Post "Ego Death"

GeminiVI

Ego Death - Wikipedia.org

It's been over a year since I had the experience which is known as "ego death".

After several month of intensive meditation practice I read "A Still Forest Pool" by Ajahn Chah and began Vipassana practice. The island of self began to dissolve. The inner monologue was the last thing to go, immediately giving rise to the experience known as "ego death". Upon seeing how "my" thoughts just appeared out of no where the process of association ceased by reason that "I" was not actually creating them, and the phenomena known as ego death was experienced. Since then "I've" somewhat been adrift.

I would not describe the experience in the same terms as the Wikipedia citation does. I believe it to be a less refined view of the experience. There is a lingering feeling that I need to enter into a process of reconditioning

I was wondering if someone out there has had the same experience and if they could offer guidance. I'll elaborate more, questions are welcome, but I'm quite tired at the moment.

zenff

None of us can undo your meditation.
You shouldn’t have done it. Ha!

So maybe if you explain in what sense you feel “somewhat adrift”, someone around here can give a more practical advice.

Cloud

Yeah the conditioning you need is called the Noble Eightfold Path.

Whoknows

Hi @GeminiVI ,

If you have a teacher then talk to them. Irrespectively, I strongly suggest that you read "Mind at Ease" by Traleg Kyabgon.

Do not consider experiences that you have as particularly good or bad. The experiences themselves do not cause us problems but our value judgments that attach to these experiences. What you may be missing is a conceptual framework for your experience. What is your motivation (answer to yourself not here in the forum, its none of our business! ), personal liberation, universal liberation? Formulating your motivation and keeping it clear in mind before meditation can help a lot with achieving right direction.

If you read Mind at Ease you should be able to recognise certain concepts that can help you in relation to ego death, though such a term is not used. To me it appears to be the experience of the spontaneity of thoughts. From a practical point of view if your having trouble following through with actions that you believe you should perform, then when an idea comes to mind that you think is worth following through with, write out a reminder to yourself, pop it on the fridge or computer or somewhere useful, very low tech but very effective. If you're not already then practise tranquility meditation, after that follow those spontaneous thoughts and look for the gaps in between them. Remember what you describe as Ego Death is neither good nor bad.

Finally, act as ethically as you can irrespective of the cause of your thoughts, that will create a positive reflection on your meditation and your mental well being. There are a few deviations that you should know about and avoid, they are listed in the book as well.

Cheers, WK

ravkes

i experienced the same thing.
you don't really need any sort of reconditioning, now that you've seen reality for what it is.. just see thoughts as thoughts, emotions as emotions and so on..
let it all be and go with the flow..
even if there's no sense of self anymore in that experience over there, there's still this body/mind mechanism which if used correctly can help a great many people who are still attached to a sense of self which causes them suffering.

i remember, before i tripped and woke up from the dream.. i didn't even question reality or who i was. it was only until i was thrown into the void so to speak did i even begin to realize what was going on

Jeffrey

The feeling of adrift must feel important