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Extreme tension in body

JerreJerre
edited March 2011 in Buddhism Basics
Hi, with extreme tension I mean the following:
- pounding arteries
- 'cause of the tension in my body others get extreme itches, like you do when you feel unconfortable 'cause you made the other uncomfortable with something you say. With extreme itches I mean a constantl itch.
The situations I have it are when I'm with someone and when I do things the best I can (perfectionism).
Any tips with this problem? If I pay attention to my body it helps big but than I can't focus on anything else..

Comments

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    Yes.

    Stop.

    If it feels good, do it.
    When in doubt - don't.

    I think that if you're a perfectionist, you're probably also a worrier. These hindrances come to you before practice, and you set yourself up for failure.

    Oh, hang on....


    Before I continue, are you talking about these things arising specifically in meditation? Or during the natural course of daily events....?
  • DairyLamaDairyLama Veteran Veteran
    Hi, with extreme tension I mean the following:
    - pounding arteries
    It sounds like raised blood pressure due to stress - but I'm not a doctor.;-)

    P
  • JerreJerre

    Before I continue, are you talking about these things arising specifically in meditation? Or during the natural course of daily events....?
    In everyday life: it's fear of 2 things: not performing at best (bv when I need to remember something, there is a fear not remembering things and that would mean I'm stupid..) It's really absurd 'cause I know I'm not stupid and a stupid 'memory-test' isn't going to disconfirm that. But I deny everything (before I discovered buddhism) and I took much importance in having no fear or desire and one fucked good way is to tense the body. But now I'm trying to let the emotions in but I don't feel much in my body and I'm having the feeling 'how can you notice your body constantly, I can notice it but than I can't listen to what another is saying. But when I don't listen to my body it tenses.. So..
  • MountainsMountains Veteran
    If I were stupid because I couldn't remember things, I'd be sitting in a padded room drooling right now. Your memory (which works differently in all of us) has nothing whatsoever in any way, shape, form, or fashion to do with your intelligence.

    Sounds to me like some serious mindfulness meditation is what you need. If you're experiencing headaches, blurred vision, tingling sensations, or anything else 'not normal' you should *definitely* see a doctor. Your overactive stress response could be doing dangerous things to your body. I don't know how old you are or what, if any, other medical problems you might have, so seeing a doctor is a good idea for you regardless. If you smoke cigarettes STOP NOW!! Cigarettes are the most toxic thing ever invented by mankind. One can make all kinds of arguments in favor of all kinds of substances like marijuana, alcohol, etc. There is not a single solitary good thing you can say about tobacco. It has zero redeeming qualities. Well, just one - as a nurse, it means job security for me.
  • JerreJerre
    Yeah I agree with you that I need SERIOUS mindfull meditation! Thanks for you reply! Funny thing that I say the same thing to many people: SMOKING DOESN'T DO ANY GOOD! IT'S SO ABSURD! Back to my 'problem': I know see it clearly, it ALWAYS goes like this: heavy emotion (only when I -> tension body instead of feeling the pain/fear/desire. Especially fear is killing me. I always want to control the fear/pain/desire (I'm a controlfreak about happiness/good feeling, and I found half a year from now how, by tensioning the body. And the thing is, I got fucking good in it. Too bad it gives the most unfree feeling ever and more pain than the original pain but I don't have to explain here what controlling emotions does. It takes serious awareness, and constant adjustment to undo the conditioning of tensioning. Any suggestions to get my control-habit under control or any specific mindfull meditation you recomand? Thanks for your reply once again, I SERIOUSLY appreciate it and even if your aware of my suffering, you still have no clue what this means to me.
  • JerreJerre
    Or any book that could help me? I'm seriously into books
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    I have noticed some things I have in common with you. Your stream of writing is awesome how you are guiding me through your understanding. Do you know why I say that? Because it was interesting to read. I think I feel heavy emotion sometimes too but I don't know what emotion is. Don't take this the wrong way. I have heard that smoking is very addictive and you should clap your hands for recgnizing that you don't want it. Then I always make associations with a good feeling. But I know that I am clapping. What books have you read before?
  • JerreJerre
    What books have you read before?
    I've just finished reading Radical Acceptance, from Tara Brach. Excellent book to heighten your awareness! It gives you awareness about the cause of things you do and how to get enlightened by suffering. She references to Western psychology. The overall message is how to connect and belong (instead of feeling seperate self and alone) and that suffering isn't bad! I like to add: Levinson (top psychologist) has done major analysis of people's life and her conclusion was: no good times without having gone through bad! So it's confirmed. Hope this helps you :)

    Too bad my problem is just that I have this thing that I want to fully commit to an activity and let anything else out, but that leads to even my emotions, which are blocked by tension. The tensioning is soo dam hard :( I sometimes even feel it's gonna cause serious damage to my body :( It's even that hard that lights start flickering off-on! I would do anything to release this bad habit!
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    edited March 2011
    Its a little bit difficult. For example I had said to myself that I would take a 3 month break from this site for silly things I had said and having a bad body feeling. But thinking about the incident I thought well how can I learn about this? If I take 3 months off I might not ever come back! So I decided it would either be 3 days or 3 weeks.

    And now here I am. I saw someone I could relate to and I wanted to offer my experience to you.

    With that perhaps I am making a bad decision in breaking my promise to 'myself'. If you are having physical problems you can explore them. Remember what sets off a condition in your body and take note of that. Just sit with it for awhile. There are others on the forum who understand the body better than I. But when I have a pain I get a little blue and worried about it. Kind of squishes my normally upbeat seeking behaviour.

    I didn't get that one about the lights? Are the cycles of the lights becoming irregular or spotting the alternating current? That doesn't make sense because the brain normally interprets the lights as simply 'light'. Are you letting out some emotion?

    What I noticed in your third post was that you might be having trouble expressing your experience in words. I have this problem mostly in the morning when I am not relaxed and the environment is very busy. At that time it is good therapy to practice with forming an understanding even though it may not be perfect.

    But like I said I don't understand about the flickering lights.
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