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Dealing with Anger? Being Mindful?

DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
edited June 2011 in Buddhism Basics
Dealing with Anger? Being Mindful?

Comments

  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    edited June 2011
    I think the first step is to recognize that you can do a lot of harm when you are intoxicated with anger. This will temper your anger and avoid the most negative situations which just mold and shape your anger more entrenched.

    Then I think I have almost a sadness and a hopelessness about my anger. Within that there is a drifting or movement to relax. With patience sometimes a warmth comes up and wisdom about the situation.

    I have practiced for ages in response to anger. As I have improved I see more and more how anger is ingrained in me and shapes me. And my life.
  • santhisouksanthisouk Veteran
    It arises, it remains, and it eventually passes. :)

    metta
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    When my anger turned to sadness and blockedness after a long time and I had worked with this a bit some genuine emotion and gratefulness in life came. Sometimes.
  • Still_WatersStill_Waters
    In meditation, we learn to be mindful of our thoughts and emotions without clinging to them, allowing them to pass. With enough practice, it is possible to deal with anger this way. Charlotte Joko Beck, in "Everyday Zen," describes this as follows:

    "I am not implying that there will not be upsets. What I mean is that when we get upset, we don't hold onto it. If we become angry, we are just angry for a second. Others may not even be aware of it. That is all there is to it. There is no clinging to the anger, no mental spinning with it."

    Alan
  • TheLastGambitTheLastGambit
    I think many of our reactions have become habbit for people. Those quick to anger are those who have let theirselves become angry in the past and continue to do so -- as habbit -- in the now. It's my belief that just as with any other habbit, being aware -- being mindful -- that your falling back on this habbit is one step closer to overcoming this anger; this theory in mind, you must also ask yourself: why am I angry right now? Am I really angry?

    Just as with any other habbit, anger is one that is difficult to break free of but gets easier with time and practice.
  • poptartpoptart Veteran
    Thich Nhat Hanh deals with this subject very well in his book Anger. He says he treats his anger like a suffering child. When you are angry turn your awareness inwards to deal with your own pain instead of directing it outwards at its cause.
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    Thich Nhat Hanh deals with this subject very well in his book Anger. He says he treats his anger like a suffering child. When you are angry turn your awareness inwards to deal with your own pain instead of directing it outwards at its cause.
    I like that!
    Thanks!
    And thanks everyone for commenting!
  • buddhacoebuddhacoe
    Thich Nhat Hanh deals with this subject very well in his book Anger. He says he treats his anger like a suffering child. When you are angry turn your awareness inwards to deal with your own pain instead of directing it outwards at its cause.
    I like that!
    Thanks!
    And thanks everyone for commenting!
    'Thich Nhat Hanh' Great teacher!
  • auraaura Veteran
    edited June 2011
    Anger creates impenetrable walls.
    Mindfulness levels impenetrable walls.

    It is a conscious choice to live within impenetrable walls,
    but some call it security.
    Others call it prison.
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    nice aura. and useful
  • BuckyGBuckyG
    When I apply sati (mindfulness) to the arising of anger I inevitably uncover fear and/or sadness. :buck:
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    When I apply sati (mindfulness) to the arising of anger I inevitably uncover fear and/or sadness. :buck:

    Fear and Sadness?
    Hmm... Why so?
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran

    'Thich Nhat Hanh' Great teacher!

    He is great!
    Thank you!
  • BuckyGBuckyG
    edited June 2011

    Fear and Sadness?
    Hmm... Why so?
    You're guess is probably as good as mine. I'm not sure it matters though, because when I'm noticing sadness and/or fear I'm already on my way to release and cessation of that sadness and/or fear. Does that make sense?
    :buck:
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran

    Fear and Sadness?
    Hmm... Why so?
    You're guess is probably as good as mine. I'm not sure it matters though, because when I'm noticing sadness and/or fear I'm already on my way to release and cessation of that sadness and/or fear. Does that make sense?
    :buck:
    It's starting too!
    But I wonder if that is due to mindfulness or due to something else?
  • BuckyGBuckyG
    Hi LeonBasin,
    If by "it," you mean fear and sadness, I still don't know or believe I need to. If by "it" you mean release and cessation, it's not due to "something else" but something more: bodhipakkhiyādhammā practice.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bodhipakkhiyādhammā :buck:
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    I meant fear and sadness.
    Thank you for the link!
    Are you practicing Zazen?
  • BuckyGBuckyG
    I meant fear and sadness.
    Thank you for the link!
    Are you practicing Zazen?
    You're welcome for the link.
    I probably don't practice zazen in what you'd consider a formal way currently, but I have. It was a key ingredient for overcoming a personal problem I'd be happy to have a private conversation with you about.
    IMO, fear and sadness, like all forms of dukkha, are always due to tanha (craving/desire) and uapadana (clinging/grasping). :buck:
  • BeachHouseGuyBeachHouseGuy
    Anger can be useful if you use it for something productive, depends.
  • BuckyGBuckyG
    edited June 2011
    :buck:
    hi girlikesam
    On Anger:
    http://newbuddhist.com/discussion/comment/205041#Comment_205041 :buck:
  • BuckyGBuckyG
    edited June 2011
    Ajahn Sundara: Untangling the Tangle Q & A: Great stuff here on Anger starting around the 7:30 mark: http://www.audiodharma.org/talks/audio_player/343.html :buck:
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