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I am starting a new quest to regain my beginner buddhist mind. I had so much fun. Everything was exciting. I remembered what I would always tell myself: Simplify!
As I've walked the path, I think I've taken on too many expectations from buddhism. What was once an escape from stress has become in some ways another source of stress.
So now I will simplify once more. And try to ask less questions. Questions bring parameters answers must fit into. Am I a bad buddhist? Well, what is a buddhist? What is bad? I give myself headaches these days.
I am going to breathe, and listen, and be still and simple. I think more about my practice and spend less time practicing. Oh jeeze.