Feeling that i am doing it wrong!

Nutkins

Hello,
I have been meditating for about a year now and at the beginning i didn't think much about it and had some good experiences whilst meditating. Now that i'm am trying to meditate 'offically' i am finding it hard. I usually like to meditate lying down before i go to sleep but most of the books i have read states that you shouldn't lie down, otherwise you may fall asleep. I have never fallen asleep whilst meditating. So i have bought myself a meditation stool! I also feel that watching a candle instead of trying to watch the breath helps (as i suffer from rhinitis and find it hard to breath).

I feel that i am not meditating properly.

Does any of these questions resonant with anyone?
Godbless Nutkins

jll

Trust you own feeling.
If you think its wrong, it probably is.
Find a teacher.

person

You seem to be doing fine. Sitting up does help in developing the proper mental states. Focusing on an object instead of the breath is perfectly fine. An image of the Buddha (or an image from another religion if thats your cup of tea) is usually recommended though since its a virtuos object where as a candle is neutral. And as @jll says a good teacher is a plus.

daemyo

Hi, Nutkins. It's wonderful that you are practicing. Don't worry about not meditating "properly". If the candle flame helps you to pay attention, then that's fine for now. Proper meditation is simply to pay attention. JUST NOW... this moment... what is this? What are you doing just now? - without analysis, without judgement, without making anything, without naming anything. As you are reading this, feel the temperature of the air, notice the sounds that you hear, notice, notice, notice. Come back, again and again, each time your attention wanders off. Do this on the cushion, or lying down. You're doing just fine.

gassho,
DM

ddrishi

I too have been into meditation for over five years now.
2. Initially many times I had the feeling that I may not be doing it the right way till I realized that there can't be wrong way at all so far meditation is concerned. Learning meditation involves a lot of experimentation with oneself and it is difficult to classify any method as 'right' or 'wrong'. But I do believe that after about two years, the meditational practice starts settling down.
3. Having tried all conceivable methods at meditation, I found that (a) watching your breath, and (b) mindful physical exercise/yoga, and (c) walking meditation are most easy to handle.
4. Regarding falling asleep during sitting meditation, I was told, and now I believe it to be true, that it hardly matters if you fall asleep. Start it again when you get up. If there is a shortage of time, try this - make a oval or a circle with the tips of your thumb and index finger touching each other - one hand or both, and hold it that way while sitting in meditation. The moment you are going to fall asleep. thumb and index finger will fall apart and wake you up.
Try it. It worked for me.

upekka

I usually like to meditate lying down before i go to sleep but most of the books i have read states that you shouldn't lie down, otherwise you may fall asleep. I have never fallen asleep whilst meditating.

if you are trying to concentrate the mind there is a 'probability' that you 'might' sleep

'you may' or 'you might', but not 100% you will

but

you can investigate the 'Dhamma Teaching' you have heard or read before you go to sleep

this can be called 'investigation Buddha's Teaching' (dhamma vicaya) which never make you sleepy

again this can be called 'Insight meditation' which leads you to gain Insight