Negative Office Energy and a Christmas Party

Dreadgurl

Hi! My office environment is incredibly "negative", and I work hard everyday to maintain my composure, my calm, and a peaceful loving frame of mind. This place has been my biggest life test learning to deal with very strong personalities. In a typical day here, someone will get yelled at by one of the aggressive outside sales people, another guy who sits right near me will curse and swear, and pretty much everyone is badmouthing every chance they get. Rarely is anything positive said. I get paid well here, and I need to help take care of my family financially, so quitting isn't really an option right now. I'm finishing up my yoga teacher training, and then will be enrolling in a Holistic Nutritionist program, but that will take me two years. Does anyone have any advice to give me to try not to absorb any of the negative energy? And I really don't want to go to the staff Christmas party since I try to be selective of what kind of energy I am around in my spare time. How do I tell them this without offending or hurting anyone, and more importantly without lying?

Peace,
Melissa

Hubris

Simply tell them that you have another commitment that day. Granted the commitment need only be to yourself and sanity, however that is none of their business. Not a lie exactly.

Have you considered addressing your concerns with a human resources officer or management? Morale in an office is very important because you spend a great majority of your time there, and to be steeped in negativity on a constant basis is wearing. Especially if you dread going there and get ill when you are there.

Part of the responsibility must fall on the employer to foster a pleasant working experience for their employees, and that means being aware of and correcting low morale. They may not be aware.

Good luck.

Dreadgurl

Hubris, thanks very much for the response. Unfortunately my Branch Operations Manager is a big part of the negativity issue. I brought all of this up with my regional manager in the past, and he tried to make some changes but it doesn't seem to work. Unfortunately some of the people here are incredibly valuable to our branches success, and they will not remove them or we could lose sales. I would think that morale would be more important, but my views are not the same as corporates. They give the salesmen whatever they want to shut them up so we can keep the sales. A couple of the people display serious Sociopathic characteristics.

It's a very old school mentality in this place as some of the people have been here 30+ years and will just refuse to change. There's really not much they can do in terms of repairing or increasing office morale. I am quiet most of the day, and try to ignore the negativity going on. It's really all i can do is focus on myself and getting through the day without any chips in my armour.

I often include these people in lovingkindness meditations, to try to cultivate compassion... and I do have compassion for them, it's just hard to get through the work day without if affecting my energy. I feel exhausted when I leave here in the evening.

Dreadgurl

Oh and P.S. thanks for the idea on telling them I have a prior committment. You are right, I have a commitment to myself Thanks for that!

Mountains

Do you have a little Buddha statue or image in your office/cubicle? That can do wonders.

Hubris

Sad that a company will sacrifice the morale of their workers to make the almighty dollar, especially when both are obtainable.

person

Does your work allow you to wear earbuds? If you can listen to teachings throughout the day that should help keep the energy positive. Spending a few minutes in meditation once you get home can help clear some of the energy away as well.

zombiegirl

in my experience, people just like to complain. good jobs, bad jobs, everybody seems to have this "damn the man!" mentality until they become 'the man'. you can get caught up in gossip, agree with them, even join in if you wish to... or, you can stand up for yourself and have none of it. personally, i always felt better when i stood up for my convictions instead of just staying silent. true, people probably won't like you much if you challenge their negativity, but at least you'll feel true to yourself.

i think i shall have to reference an extremely overused quote, but a good one, nonetheless... "be the change you wish you see in the world." this applies to even small things like staying positive about a workplace instead of useless bitching.

Dreadgurl

Does your work allow you to wear earbuds? If you can listen to teachings throughout the day that should help keep the energy positive. Spending a few minutes in meditation once you get home can help clear some of the energy away as well.

Hey this is a great idea thanks. I'm in customer service so I have to answer the phone, but I'm sure I would hear the phone overtop of my recordings. I will give this a shot next week. Do you know where I can find some audio teachings on cd? or that I can download (not illegally haha)?

Thanks,
Melissa

Dreadgurl

Sad that a company will sacrifice the morale of their workers to make the almighty dollar, especially when both are obtainable.

Hubris, I totally agree it is very sad. I don't plan on staying here longer than I need to, but until I leave I'll take this as a great learning experience

person

Here's a few places from the Tibetan tradition, there are loads of free teachings available online though with just a few quick google searches. I'm pretty sure theres at least one thread on here with links as well.

The Dalai Lama, these are all available in mp3 form. http://www.dalailama.com/webcasts/category/1

Thubten Chodron http://www.thubtenchodron.org/AudioLibrary/index.html

My own lama, Abong Rinpoche http://gyuto.us/index.php/teachings-menu