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Quitting smoking.
Zayl
Veteran
I need help here. A part of me wants to quit smoking cigarettes and other tobacco products, but a part of me loves it too much to give up. I love more than just the nicotine. It is the sitting in a room after a hard day. Nothing to think about, so I smoke and enjoy the feel of smoke in my lungs as I watch the smoke cloud about type deal. I fully recognize I have an unhealthy attachment to smoking, and I am sure you have been through threads like this a thousand times. But I want to quit it. I want advice not from Buddhists, but from people who have managed to overcome smoking. It's not that I don't value everyone's opinion, but I feel that only someone who has gone through what I am going through can understand.
I meditate when I smoke, but I don't smoke when I meditate (someone from this forum brought this to my mind) However I also smoke in many other occasions. For example, I am waiting outside for someone. I have nothing to do other than sit or stand where I am. So I smoke to pass the time and help me think. That is the kind of smoker I am. Addicted to more than just the nicotine.
I meditate when I smoke, but I don't smoke when I meditate (someone from this forum brought this to my mind) However I also smoke in many other occasions. For example, I am waiting outside for someone. I have nothing to do other than sit or stand where I am. So I smoke to pass the time and help me think. That is the kind of smoker I am. Addicted to more than just the nicotine.
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I seem to recall my brother say that the first stage of quitting for him was to try to maximize the enjoyment/cigs smoked ratio. So instead of smoking all the time in response to edginess he smoked twice a day roughly.. when waking and when eating dinner. He savored those times and because nicotine is a tolerance producing drug by smoking LESS you enjoy more.
This pattern I duplicated in beating drinking. I was a binge drinker which means I didn't drink often but when I did I really put a beating on my brain. I was guilty when I drank though indulgent and partying during. My lama told me to go full force either drinking or not drinking. So I began trying to enjoy drinking every day. For awhile I drank six beers a day and I just accepted that and dropped the guilt. But I didn't binge anymore.
I would liken that to trying to enjoy a cigarette but yet modifying behaviour. The second stage a friend died of liver failure and it sobered me up. Also I embarassed myself with my sangha. I wanted to practice buddhism more than I wanted to drink and I just gave it up cold turkey.. But I think smoking is more addictive and you might have to cut back.
Other tips is oral craving things replacements like eating sunflower seeds. Or raisins.
I think you need to know why you are quitting.
But it's also wise to be mindful of why you do it in the first place. Smoking undeniably has a lot of GLAMOUR surrounding it. You feel cool when you smoke, you feel pensive, you might even open yourself to certain situations while smoking that you wouldn't otherwise....you are never "just standing there" when you are smoking...you are smoking.
It also becomes a band-aid for minor social anxieties and stressful situations. It becomes a reason to take a break while working....once....twice...thrice....
Quitting smoking can be the most empowering decision you ever make. I'm not trying to sound dramatic, but it started a chain-reaction of changes in my life. If you summon the willpower and the guile and wisdom and knowledge to quit smoking, you can change in a lot of areas in your life. And you might need to first quit smoking to even realize you wanted to change in the first place. Smoking can be a symbol of lack of control over our mind. And learning to quit can finally prove to us that our mind...was just a tool to begin with. It was just waiting for you to learn how to use it, to get what you want.
So enough propaganda....here are my tips :
- get fed up with it. for me it was the smell, the unhygienic nature of the act and its effect on my oral health, the vast amounts of money I spent on it (it never seems much until you stop spending all that pocket money) and the attempt on my pride it represented as if saying "without me you can't be pensive, you can't look cool, you can't relax, you can't even just BE by yourself")
- choose cold turkey I've tried progressively quitting, but it never worked for me.
- be mindful of the triggers! VERY IMPORTANT the first couple of times I tried to quit I managed to stay clean for more than a couple of months, but inevitably I got drunk one night and gave in to temptation. alcohol can lower your level of consciousness and make it hard to resist. also, if you always smoke after having coffee or whatever...you might wanna lower your coffee consumption
- ignore the naysayers - friends can have a powerful effects on us if we let them
Above all, understand the potential behind this seemingly isolated change in your life. Real change is ALWAYS holistic. The rules to change any other aspect of your life aren't much different. And it will prove to you everything is interdependent. You'll rediscover your sense of taste and smell, you strengthen your mindfulness skills dramatically and your levels of ENERGY will skyrocket after the initial withdrawal phase. Btw exercise helps the detoxification process, so you might want to consider that as well.
Find your motivation, don't be discouraged if you find yourself falling a couple of times...it's just like meditation...you keep gently focusing on what you want to focus and remove attention from what you don't want until it disappears. The most important thing is to never give up. Hope you can do it. Good luck
All that is pleasurable about smoking was still there....kicking back, drawing in the "smoke" and the sense of relaxation. 75% of my usage was in the car (have a long commute), and they help keep me alert in the car (no drowziness), keep me off snacking in the car, and don't stink up my car as a traditional cig would. (And that said, I just finished a great audio book, "The Naked Buddha" by Adrianne Howley, an ordained Nun, Mayahanan School, heard mostly in the car).
The jury is out on whether ECigs are "harmless", but there is no question that they are far less harmFUL than the traditional demon weed. They might serve as the crutch you need to quit, as they replicate the psychological aspect of the habit nicely.
They can be found for sale in large Malls and there are countless sources for them on line and, at least in my case, the customer service is excellent and shipments are prompt.
Triggers! Yes, you need to avoid eating/drinking/doing things that habitually led to smoking - like coffee in the morning, beer, TV etc. A lifestyle change, until you can safely take these things up again.
Cold turkey is the only way IMO. Everything else gives you the opportunity to fail.
ps. Cancer is a NASTY disease!!!!!
Try to find a substitute for smoking that fulfills a similar need. Make it special, really psych yourself for it. This may sound lame, it's just an example: start a nice tea collection. Go out and really shop for some high-end teas, explore the tea market. Make a ritual out of making the tea, and sitting and sipping, and really enjoying the flavor, the feel of the mug in your hands, the warmth. So when you have a craving to smoke, you go and make tea, and really get into the experience. Make it a tea meditation. That type of approach might help, some other example might suit you better. get creative. Good luck.
I just ordered an two days ago, maybe I'll try getting a tea collection.
If you do want to get all buddhist about it, a monk on the internet was recommending doing a mantra in the mind while smoking. "holding, holding, inhaling, exhaling, holding."
maybe something like this?
whatever gets you going
to take care of the 'habitual' problem of smoking, i would sometimes smoke nicotine free cigarettes like the "ecstacy" brand. i used to find smoking helpful for reflection while writing and this is usually when i would pull out one of these 'fake' cigs. but btw, they aren't satisfying like smoking tobacco, it tasted like i was smoking a chamomile tea bag, lol. i really doubt anyone could ever get hooked on those things, but i do think that after a while of smoking them, the memory of 'smoking' became much less pleasant, lol.