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A hypothetical on prosperity and honesty

ClayTheScribeClayTheScribe Veteran
edited January 2012 in Buddhism Today
So, let's say, I were to win the lottery tomorrow, a significant amount. Obviously, I would want to keep that a secret from a lot of people accept trusted friends and family, at least at the start. How would I explain myself if people asked where I got things or why I was dressed so good without telling them the direct truth that wouldn't lead them to asking more questions? How does a rich man be safe and smart about his assets, but also be an honest Buddhist?

Comments

  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    Tell them you don't discuss money.

    I have a story. I was suffering from very bad bipolar disorder and I was scheduled with a moving truck to move in with my friend from the chemistry department.

    Another guy, an aquaintence of mine, was moving out so that I could move in. He called me and changed when I could move my stuff when I had a moving truck scheduled. I told the guy at the moving trucks what the situation was.

    I can't explain how the truck owner was but he was more salt of the earth I guess you could say. What he told me was to say I DONT DO DAT.

    You just draw a line in the sand and don't cave in. So you tell them you don't discuss money. If they don't like it then that's their problem.
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    My father once told me:
    three rules:
    Never criticise someone's driving
    Never criticise someone's children
    Never discuss their salary/finances with them.

    And expect them to hold the same for you.

    it's still considered frightfully vulgar to discuss personal wealth....
  • Invincible_summerInvincible_summer Heavy Metal Dhamma We(s)t coast, Canada Veteran
    My father once told me:
    three rules:
    Never criticise someone's driving
    Never criticise someone's children
    Never discuss their salary/finances with them.

    And expect them to hold the same for you.

    it's still considered frightfully vulgar to discuss personal wealth....
    I think it depends on one's culture. However, the fact that discussing one's earnings is not taboo in some societies doesn't mean that it's not still used as a method of appraising one's "worth."
  • patbbpatbb Veteran
    I know you were only half joking so i hope you wont mind me adding to your post federica
    And expect them to hold the same for you.
    expecting others to do something like this is setting ourselves up for disappointment ;)

    people do this all the time with more serious stuff, it is very common and cause many people much unnecessary stress...

    to spot this in real life is really simple.

    Every time someone says something along the line of "why did she have to say this? why can't he mind his own business?..."
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    If someone asks you to divulge something of a sensitive nature you's really rather not discuss, ask them conspiratorially....
    "Can you keep a secret?"

    When they eagerly reply "yes", then say -
    "... so can I!"
  • ClayTheScribeClayTheScribe Veteran
    But doesn't having secrets conflict with having a truly open heart and being honest in all endeavors?
  • JasonJason God Emperor Arrakis Moderator
    edited January 2012
    You could always say, 'It's none of your business,' and leave it at that. Or, if you wanted to be a bit more polite, you could simply shrug and remain silent, and eventually they'd get tired of asking. Nobody's required to tell everyone everything simply because they ask.
  • vinlynvinlyn Colorado...for now Veteran
    Good luck if you ever move to Thailand! The Thais will ask you almost anything, even if they don't know you well. How much did that shirt cost? How old are you? How much do you earn? And they will make statements, that are just statements, with no judgment attached: You are fat. You are hairy.

    Of course, it is also accepted that when they ask you something too personal, you are allowed to give a vague answer.

    All part of multiculturalism.
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    whoa, vinlyn, that's different! When in Thailand do as the Thai do I guess?
  • vinlynvinlyn Colorado...for now Veteran
    whoa, vinlyn, that's different! When in Thailand do as the Thai do I guess?
    For me, yes, it was go with the flow. But a lot of Westerners have a hard time with it.
  • compassionate_warriorcompassionate_warrior Veteran
    But doesn't having secrets conflict with having a truly open heart and being honest in all endeavors?
    This is setting yourself up for trouble. Knowing when to keep facts to yourself is important for survival. What if someone heard you say you bought some nice new tech toys, and a week later you arrived home to find it burglarized? There's nothing in Buddhism that says you have to divulge intimate details about yourself, whether financial or otherwise.

    You got an unexpected windfall or inheritance. End of story. Besides, when you win big in a lottery, they usually publicize it, so the whole world knows. As long as we're on the subject, could you help me out with some bills?

    :lol:
  • driedleafdriedleaf Veteran
    If it came down to it, nobody would hesitate to break the fourth precept at this point. In the end, it's all pointless to cling to. Really.
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