Fear of disconnecting with ourself.

Denkatsu

So I tried to let go of some of my addictions in my life just to look i guess. This sense of fear or disconnect kept coming up.

weighted

I think it's normal to feel fear or anxiety when you let go of addictions. The addictions become habits and we are habit-loving beings. When the addictions aren't there, you may have time to fill or nothing to do when you'd normally be resorting to those addictions and that addictive/cyclical behavior.

I think trying to really look into why you feel fear and a sense of disconnect is well worth it. Why are you so attached to these addictions? Can you replace them with something healthier and less harmful? Can you perhaps meditate when you feel the fear or anxiety arising to see if it then lessens or the cravings subside?

Denkatsu

I think somehow i make them apart or associate them with who i am and that is where the fear comes from I believe.

taiyaki

who you are is also to choose new paths and choices that lead to better states and opportunities in life.

another part of you is kindness and courage.

sit through the fear (which is yours) and bring kindness to yourself and be with the fear. with mindfulness sit with it and embrace it. then slowly inquire into it. why am i scared exactly? am i really these things? maybe i was these things but now i want to be something else.

see with mindfulness we move totally with acknowledgment, acceptance, embracing, seeing through, attaining wisdom, and then realizing what must be done.

there is an energy that constantly moves us. it fluctuates from suffering to happiness.

with the power of mindfulness one can actively plant seeds of mindfulness and move towards happiness.

your addictions are not to be abandoned. they are to be accepted and then with the creative nature that we all have...we are to envision a new path which is more wholesome.

you already have the power to be mindful. the power to be courageous. the power to be kind. the power to see clearly and to identify. the power to change. the power to see that change is not only better for yourself but better for all those around you.

we all need you.

genkaku

This sense of fear or disconnect kept coming up.

@Denkatsu -- A determined meditation brings can nourish a fear of loss and a willingness to lose. Bit by bit, what others call courage becomes the norm. If there is nothing to lose, being afraid to lose it simply ceases to make any common sense.

Patience, courage and doubt are our allies.

Jeffrey

who you are is also to choose new paths and choices that lead to better states and opportunities in life.

another part of you is kindness and courage.

sit through the fear (which is yours) and bring kindness to yourself and be with the fear. with mindfulness sit with it and embrace it. then slowly inquire into it. why am i scared exactly? am i really these things? maybe i was these things but now i want to be something else.

see with mindfulness we move totally with acknowledgment, acceptance, embracing, seeing through, attaining wisdom, and then realizing what must be done.

there is an energy that constantly moves us. it fluctuates from suffering to happiness.

with the power of mindfulness one can actively plant seeds of mindfulness and move towards happiness.

your addictions are not to be abandoned. they are to be accepted and then with the creative nature that we all have...we are to envision a new path which is more wholesome.

you already have the power to be mindful. the power to be courageous. the power to be kind. the power to see clearly and to identify. the power to change. the power to see that change is not only better for yourself but better for all those around you.

we all need you.

:bowdown:

This sense of fear or disconnect kept coming up.

@Denkatsu -- A determined meditation brings can nourish a fear of loss and a willingness to lose. Bit by bit, what others call courage becomes the norm. If there is nothing to lose, being afraid to lose it simply ceases to make any common sense.

Patience, courage and doubt are our allies.

:bowdown:

Denkatsu

I have this great sense what we are doing is benifiting no one and there is no sense to it at all.

Jeffrey

Maybe your doing things for the wrong reasons? Do you think that addictions deliver what they promise? What happens before the disconnect? It can be an opportunity.

Denkatsu

a lurching gut feeling u thru the middle of my chest.

Denkatsu

when th craving for the object hits

Denkatsu

Id say before the disconnect a mental battle between me and it.

Denkatsu

My mind always seems to make a good excuse everytime it seems.

Jeffrey

I vow to practice hard till I can understand how to help. Breath in the feeling, and breath out letting go as the feeling expands.

Denkatsu

These things make me wanna meditate and give myself fully to practice.

weighted

These things make me wanna meditate and give myself fully to practice.

You should!

Lady_Alison

Listen to the koala, little one.

genkaku

I have this great sense what we are doing is benifiting no one and there is no sense to it at all.

That's a good start.

bdchrist

My advice is to focus on having the right thought. This sense of fear with disconnecting from yourself is you relating these attachments to being part of you. First, it would be worth exploring the 'self'. Learn about the ego and the illusion of the self.

I repeat. You are not your addictions. In fact, there is no you. There is no you without addictions and there is no you with addictions. Simply, neither exists.

However, for someone without a true realization of this understanding, you may still find difficulty in ending your addictive habits, so I will help you come up with a real solution for this:

You must replace your negative habits with positive habits. For example: Do you smoke cigarettes? Replace this habit with brushing your teeth. Now, instead of thinking negative thoughts such as "I need a cigarette", think positive ones such as "My breath smells good, my clothes smell good, I'm saving money, I'm feeling good". The negative thoughts will come, but you must recognize them and take action.

The truth is, addictions are one of the hardest things to overcome in our life. Sometimes we are filled with physical and mental attachments. Realize that if you do overcome this obstacle, you will have not only improved your spiritual studies but you will have acquired great wisdom and insight when you have completed your journey through this struggle. Most of us who pick up a great understanding of Buddhist concepts such as suffering, are those who have been through great moments of suffering.

zenff

Voice Dialogue is a method to come into dialogue with our inner voices. These voices belong to the various parts of our personality: our selves. Each of these selves has its own way of thinking, feeling, behavior and observation. Often we identify with one or more sub-personalities, our so-called "primary selves", while other parts of us try to let themselves be heard in vain. In Voice Dialogue the various selves are invited to speak freely, to manifest themselves with all their energy. Freely means without interference of the ego, which often identifies itself with critical sub-personalities, like the "controller" and the "critic".
http://www.en.voicedialogueworld.com/index.php?cmd=page&id=13

I learned from this Voice Dialogue approach.
It helps me to see this longing energy as a “partial-peronality” or whatever you like to name it.
It has this craving for what it is addicted to and has its own logic about it. It feels very strong about it.
But other inner voices get space to speak out too. They understand and they care; they’re just not the addict. They’re not the ones with the twisted reward-system.

It may all sound weird but it’s as if the leadership is taken away from this longing/addicted fellow inside, on occasions where he should really not be the one who is in charge. The rest of the folk (inside) understand him and care for him, but help him to gradually find other, healthier kinds of joy and reward.
The Voice Dialogue worked for me to solve inner conflict and to find some inner harmony and gives me a model for making some better (in my case healthier) decisions.

If this all seems insane to you or soft or whatever ignore it!
I’m just saying it helps me.