Intuition

Pollyanna83

I've noticed that I have very intense (negative) emotions before and after hanging out with a particular person. This person has a beautiful heart and mind, but I have great uneasiness/stress associated with them though we get along wonderfully. I'm not certain if there is just an attachment and strong clinging to this person that creates these feelings or if it's my intuition telling me to maintain distance. How would I know? (This person is a potential romantic partner).

RebeccaS

Is it just nerves? I always trust my gut about stuff, and it seems like something is definitely up, you just have to figure out if it's this person or you. Do they do anything at all that makes you uncomfortable, or that just seems a little off? Or are you doing anything that might make you feel guilty (trying too hard too impress, that kind of thing)? It could be both, of course, but getting into specifics with yourself might help you figure it out.

Zero

Pollyanna83 said:

I've noticed that I have very intense (negative) emotions before and after hanging out with a particular person.

This person has a beautiful heart and mind, but I have great uneasiness/stress associated with them though we get along wonderfully.

I'm not certain if there is just an attachment and strong clinging to this person that creates these feelings or if it's my intuition telling me to maintain distance.

How would I know? (This person is a potential romantic partner).

Sounds like you two gel - you like their heart, mind and you get along... sounds great.

Perhaps the uneasiness / stress is linked to something else other than his attributes etc - perhaps it has more to do with the issues you are facing in considering dating than anything the potential partner has done or is.

Can you be more specific on the desire to keep the person at a distance?

Pollyanna83

Hmm...could be a lot of things I guess. This is the first person I've met in years that I could actually see myself dating. It's either nerves associated with that or the feeling that I am some how not worthy of this person's attention-which I'm struggling to face.

Zero

Pollyanna83 said:

Hmm...could be a lot of things I guess.

This is the first person I've met in years that I could actually see myself dating.

It's either nerves associated with that or the feeling that I am some how not worthy of this person's attention-which I'm struggling to face.

It's natural to be nervous when starting out with someone - that's half the charm of a new relationship... butterflies in the belly and all that...

Feeling you're not worthy can't be great for you - it sounds like you're torturing yourself - if he's hanging out with you and you are enjoying eachothers' company then there is mutuality.

It's easy to say but everyone is worthy of anothers' attention - only you can believe that about yourself - torture or nurture...? Be kinder to yourself...

Sounds likely that in this instance, your intuition is highlighting certain issues about you that you may benefit from resolving.

I wish you luck in your adventure - take it slow and don't be afraid to do stuff despite the voices nagging you in the opposite direction - everyone deserves and is worthy of love - sometimes, to cease nagging doubts, one just has to go for it - equally though take it with a pinch of salt as change is inevitable.

MaryAnne

@pollyanna83

I believe everyone has a sense of intuition. Some have a weak sense, some a strong sense. Whichever they have, some are vaguely aware of it, some are highly aware of it.
I have a very strong sense of intuition, to the point that I can 'read' people when I want to. I've been aware of it since I was a little kid- before I even knew what it was or how to express what I felt (about people or situations).

All that said, what is your own impression of your "intuition", Pollyanna83?
Do you have any history you can fall back on when it comes to your sense of intuition and its reliability? If you do and its reliability is pretty good, then by all means, take things slow until you figure out WHY you are getting this uneasy feeling...

Maybe it is just 'nerves' - because you are interested in this person romantically? Could be. But if your intuition is usually right ON, and you feel like this is something else ... take it slow. Good luck - and let us know how things go!

RebeccaS

Come to think of it... I don't really believe in nerves. I think if we're nervous about something it's because something is off, usually within us. Like, we don't believe we are good enough (like OP alluded to) or we're hiding something and we're afraid of being caught, that kind of thing. If we're nervous, something is definitely off and it's worth looking at.