is there any thing in present moment which we can feel? i tried to feel something, but not able to feel anything. just now i am sitting in my room, with a gentle breeze going on and i hearing a song in TV - just tried to felt what it feels like in here and now - i observed that basically when we try to feel anything in here and now, it just makes some kind of tension in the face muscles near eye or ear or a slight frown type of thing - so this in a way distorts the feeling of present moment. so i tried to relax my muscles and bring my face to normal, as if nothing is happening or nothing is to be done - then i thought let me feel present moment by keeping myself relaxed, as if nothing is to be observed - then i realized while the song on TV was going on, there was just hearing of song happening. Moreover, the present moment is so small, that the moment we try to feel or make something out of it, in other words to grab it, that moment is already gone by that time.
there is nothing in present moment - just some processes happening - 'I' only comes into picture, when I try to understand something out of it. Just now, while I was thinking, when writing this post, a thought came to my mind - we are always in here and now, the only problem is we do not realize it - so when I laugh, I become angry, I cry, I am frustrated - there also I was in here and now - so this present moment has the capacity for each of these emotions to be felt and also when nothing is happening like we feeling a breeze of air on our body, that sensation is also in present moment - so the present moment has the capacity to also just feel a gentle sensation. So if present moment can align itself to feel everything, then inherently it should be nothing like space or water, which takes the shape of the utensil in which it is kept. So i think it should be empty, because if it had some inherent quality, it will obstruct in getting such a variety of experiences - happy, sad, angry, frustrated, doing nothing - to feel fully in our mind.
that is why, i think in the Hsing Hsin Ming, it is said - the great way is always in front of us - just stop liking and disliking which are the disease of the mind. But the only problem seems is the mind trying to grab everything, to make something out of it, so that the ego can say that 'I' know something or 'I' understand something.
that is why, in just sitting meditation, it is said don't do anything - because doing anything is just making more conditioning of the mind. so let all the clutter of the mind to settle down by itself and then the mind can reveal itself and then we may know, who we really are.
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Easier said then done. Should keep most of us occupied for the next few decades or at least till next week . . .
I recently watched 'The Dhamma Brothers', much better than 'Dumber and Dumber' which I enjoyed sitting with too . . . about an incarcerated vipassana retreat . . .
http://www.dhammabrothers.com/Trailer.htm
Having worked in a prison I felt its potency.
I hope the jailers will instigate a stress relieving program for themselves.
Please write us some more if you feel like it . . . hope you continue . . . in an absent, empty sort of way . . . :clap:
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.131.nana.html
my thinking (based on my theoretical understanding of the spiritual journey) says:
suffering - we consider it as bad, but it is needed, because if there is no suffering, then the motivation to come out of the suffering will not arise in the first place. earlier, what i think was that monastic life is good and worldly life is bad. but now, based on all the things which i have read till now, i can say - none is better than other. marriage is not bad, because when we live together with our partner, we come to know about our defilements - we come to know how much lust, desire to get things our way, aversion to not let things go the opposite way, trying to possess things to boost our ego saying see, this i have got. so we come to know about our defilements in this way. leading a monastic life, in a hut on a hill lonely, getting up, going around alms round for getting food to eat, coming back to hut and meditating - it helps , but the defilements inside us may remain hidden, as there is no one else to confront us to show how much we are attached to our thinking, our beliefs, our possessiveness of things.
moreover, when we come to moment to moment living, at that stage, i think there is no difference between monastic life and worldly life - because at that stage, the world may break down to just frames of vision, arising and ceasing simultaneously - so where is the time to think and distinguish that the surrounding is a hut, or a home with family members. there shall be just arising and ceasing of processes in here and now.
life is just an opportunity, given to see things just as they are - to remove the ignorance of the mind.
all the drama of life, in which we live, is created by us in our mind, which is nothing but just thoughts created by us in our mind and then we believing those thoughts.
we are usually not able to let go, but the paradox is we did not actually got anything at the first place - we just thought we have got something - and the drama starts and we make a big story of why we are not able to let go. the ego just becomes bigger and bigger - and so becomes bigger our belief in our thoughts.
we fear because we anticipate something in future will go against what we want, and we may loose something because of it - but the paradox is we have not got anything at the first place, which we may loose in future.
the biggest paradox - even though we understand the above statements, we cannot become awakened, or in other words we cannot do letting go, because that will be just another act of doing, which will boost the ego, instead of lessening the ego. moreover, since there is no entity at the first place who can do something, so nothing can be done. that is why, i think there is an importance of grace in the spiritual path, that we get help from something else, which helps us to make the final leap to end the illusion - so in a way, when the factors are ripe, the effects of the cause may bring together awakening, which will also be just a process happening, with no person doing it.
As you can see from the poignant conversation between his great lay disciple Anandapindika who is on his death bed and Sariputta. http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.143.than.html
I won't bother reading but should I give an awesome. I think it would be awesome not to . . .