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Craving stimulus? I am not entirely finding that.
I have read that we have a layer of craving to stimulus. So I assume that if I can disenchant from that craving I will be happier.
But contradicting that I have had a lot more stimulus since I befriended a girl on match.com. I feel much more happy. Though of course that can fall apart because she could die or I could lose her some how or my feelings could change to being bored of her.
So I can see she isn't a refuge, yet at the same time I am uncertain about the disenchanment from stimulus. I know renunciation is in your heart and doesn't mean that you don't consume. It's just that you are not craving that which you consume.
I think new buddhists should read this (to get a head start), but I posted it in Advanced because I think to answer the question you would have to have 'been there'.
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Don't be so certain. Being in a relationship, if that is the way things are going, can be very stabilising.
When I changed from zzz to non zzz, my partner could not cope. She felt I was a different person. Which is indicative of her perception and my defilements. If I had been better prepared she would not have noticed. No one else was too much bothered about the change but she was encouraged by me to start a relationship that matched her needs and my change. We are no longer together.
Isn't it yourTantric path that uses 'obstacles' as the very means to refuge and empowerment? You knew that right?
Some possibilities
A craving for stimulation can be as easily powered by happy feelings as unhappy ones.
This is because it's purpose is met by whichever means best distracts us from facing the uncomfortable truths of our own delusions
This makes a craving for stimulation simply our lack of acceptance for what is.
This craving for stimulation manifests as our lack of willingness to stop fiddling around with phenomena's show.
To the degree that you can allow that show to unfold on it's own, is the degree to which a craving for stimulation becomes powerless..