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Wow, what a burden. I'm so sorry. It's all too easy to offer advice, because we're all distant, and you being close, related, emotionally tied, and available give your situation some walls. You are remarkably patient and loving, which she perceives and manipulates. I can't add much to the advice already offered. I can certainly tell you that many, myself included, would respond less patiently. If she pulled the stunt about calling another relative and crying over the eggs with me, it would be a very long time before I got her eggs again, and I'd make that very plain. Admirable that you can resist that. Your aunt may have just achieved a similar result though and saved you the trouble. Were you able to be open with her in your response?
One thing I can say is that you needn't worry about becoming like her. Your family might have those tendencies, and you might even have them a little bit, but if you are selfless and loving now then that's your true nature. Lucky for those around you.
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federicaSeeker of the clear blue sky...Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubtModerator
@SpinyNorman said:
OK, but in practice if we feel good will to someone we like them, don't we?
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Not necessarily no. Ask any doctor if he likes every life he saves....
Fortunately nothing is permanent - so in that respect my view of another will change. The change ,for me ,comes from within- my perspective. Every time I am disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something "wrong" with me ,my perspective. Bob
Comments
Wow, what a burden. I'm so sorry. It's all too easy to offer advice, because we're all distant, and you being close, related, emotionally tied, and available give your situation some walls. You are remarkably patient and loving, which she perceives and manipulates. I can't add much to the advice already offered. I can certainly tell you that many, myself included, would respond less patiently. If she pulled the stunt about calling another relative and crying over the eggs with me, it would be a very long time before I got her eggs again, and I'd make that very plain. Admirable that you can resist that. Your aunt may have just achieved a similar result though and saved you the trouble. Were you able to be open with her in your response?
One thing I can say is that you needn't worry about becoming like her. Your family might have those tendencies, and you might even have them a little bit, but if you are selfless and loving now then that's your true nature. Lucky for those around you.
>
Not necessarily no. Ask any doctor if he likes every life he saves....
Fortunately nothing is permanent - so in that respect my view of another will change. The change ,for me ,comes from within- my perspective. Every time I am disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something "wrong" with me ,my perspective. Bob
"I do not like that man- I must get to know him better."
Abraham Lincoln