Still not able to observe natural breathing
misecmisc1
I am a HinduIndia Veteran
Hi All,
I am still not able to observe my natural breathing - may be I am a totally hopeless case at anapanasati breath meditation or zazen just sitting. I sit cross-legged in normal sitting position with eyes closed.
Actually whenever I try to observe my natural breathing, I cannot help but manipulate it - even though I wish not to change it or I wish not to cautiously breath, but still when I observe my natural breathing it does get changed. When I try to see something else say like a wall or anything, then after sometime I can feel my natural breath, but at that time I am just seeing the wall, so then when I try to observe the natural breathing, by turning my focus on my breathing, then it start getting changed or turn into cautious breathing.
So asking you all that is proceeding in this way by trying to observe cautious breathing any helpful or a totally waste of time? Anapanasati sutta says to observe natural breathing. So does observing cautious breathing any helpful or is it just like doing something in the external world - a doing and not just observing? Please suggest. Thanks in advance.
Comments
Please suggest.
Is it any easier with eyes open?
What you could try is deliberately regulating the breath for a short period, and then relaxing - like you would with muscles, tensing and then relaxing.
Generally you need to be relaxed to do a practice like this, so that might be something to look at. Alert but relaxed.
Alternatively, you could just stop fretting about it and making yourself tense.
Please suggest.
I'm not sure, but isn't your controlled breathing... natural? You could observe whatever happens, even that, noticing how your mind creates an expectation and judges your practice. And it's ok.
Well, I have tried always with closed eyes when I sit because whenever my eyes are open, I cannot help but get disturbed by the movements of the eyes or some motion happening in front of me - then other things crop up like are my eyes strained or relaxed - ultimately the objective of observing natural breath gets lost in the way. So I usually always sit with eyes closed.
Sometimes, I noticed one thing - may be it is a just a coincidence, but this thing happens to me - in the normal course of the day, when I just try to relax, then somehow when I observe my breathing (not sure whether the natural breathing is getting manipulated at that moment), but sometimes a small smile comes to my face. I am not trying to smile or laugh, but something happens which brings a small smile on my face - this happens rarely, so it can be just a coincidence somehow that my lips moved at that moment of observing breath that i felt a small smile on my face.
One more thing happens that somehow when I try to relax myself and then try to observe my breathing, then the ringing starts in my ears - may be due to tinnitus in my ears. So I let that tinnitus ring going on for sometime, and when my body moves that ringing stops - anyways nothing is happening in my meditation, not even observing of breath, so sometimes i let tinnitus ringing go on for sometime in my ears.
When I get entangled in my thoughts, I notice that my shoulders have dropped slightly and my face has also moved slightly. Anyways, usually there is some discomfort when I try to keep my spine erect, so I try to sit with that discomfort for some time, so that at least the body position would be ok - leave about observing breath as that is anyway not happening properly.
May be I am a totally junk case to do meditation, even though theoretically I understand a little bit that meditation is about letting go and not achieving anything.
Any suggestions, please. Thanks in advance.
You could do a little metta bhavana at the beginning of a sit, particularly the first stage of wishing yourself well. Create a kind and accepting space for your practice.
And do focus on being relaxed, it's very difficult to let go of anything if you're tense.
Try treating the practice as a relaxation exercise for a while, you might be surprised what happens.
@misecmisc1 I spent most of my life holding my breath. So uptight that my breath was shallow and high - almost non existent. It was only unnatural breathing in pranayama, martial training, yoga and qi ong that allowed some deeper breath.
So natural breath was not natural for me. I used to sigh a lot without realising it, this was the body forcing an relaxed out breath.
There are some areas where the breath is more natural. Sex for example, dance, fast walking or strenuous exercise. If you don't breath, you die. Laughing is also a move into natural breath.
As you are working on the breath in meditation I would humbly suggest learning 'salutations to the sun' or full prostrations as a precursor to your meditation. If even that is impossible than chanting, though a forced breathing will create the muscle memory associated with a lengthened breathing.
Natural breath is now with me but without meditation I would be shouting at the toaster every morning . . .
Try to bring the awareness into the space the air intake is entering. In other words you are in the centre of the breath rather than in its connection to the body . . .
Hope that gives you some help.
Make of breathing your personal practice in mindfulness.
Make it a point to notice in your every day life when you tend to hold your breath, and promise yourself to consciously ground yourself back in reality with a couple of deep breathings.
I experience the same thing. I takes years to develop that kind of breathing so don't be discouraged. Stay at it.
I gotta say that shouting at the toaster thing is funny, @lobster.
It's always helpful to share one's own anecdotes when trying to help someone because it makes them see that they don't have to be perfect and they can relax just a little more. 
I forget where I read this, and it helped me out a lot...When you feel like you're trying to control when to inhale, you pretend that you're a cat watching for a mouse to come out of its hole and in using this in my mindfulness and meditation practice, I've noticed that I have much longer breaths. It helps you observe instead of 'decide' when to inhale again! I love this visualization tip.
Sure that might help with mindfulness off the cushion, but I don't see how it helps the OP with the problem which is being described.
...you pretend that you're a cat watching for a mouse to come out of its hole and in using this in my mindfulness and meditation practice,
Nice one, I was just visualising Tom and Jerry there for a moment!
But it does make the point that it's all about paying attention to whatever is going on in that moment. Doesn't matter what it is, just pay attention to it.
Good that you notice your unnatural breath. Make the 'noticing' natural instead of trying to naturalize the breath.
Good advice, though the challenge here I think is how to be natural.
Becoming negative about not having a natural breath will only assure that you never have a natural breath.. Struggles and negativity in sitting breath meditation is what caused me to quit meditation years ago before i was a Buddhist.
The first time i truely noticed that the breath really was on auto pilot and i was not cpntrolling it, that was an amazing experience... You know when you aren't controlling the breath, and you get there by negating the hindrances and becoming calm and peaceful in your meditation.
One of the most difficult things I've found with meditation is non-judgement. Not beating myself up about not being able to sit for an hour and fully focus on the breath or whatever the meditation object may be.
The same goes for the OP's issue. As @Jayantha states above, it doesn't matter. There are plenty of great teachers out there (Thanissaro Bikkhu included) who actually encourage us to control and use the breath in different parts of the body. If we continue to do this then over time the breath will breathe itself (if that makes sense!)
Hi!
I had the same problem and every now and again it comes back for a second.
What really helped me with natural breathing was to allow your breath to flow out and WAIT for the inhalation. It comes after a second of anxiety.
Let go and trust the breath will come. It does. Tell yourself I'm going to wait for the next breath. Don't hold it. Just wait .
Then it gets easier to watch.
Also pay attention to the SENSATION of the breath. As small of an area you can manage.
It will be just like watching that wall of yours. Your watching the sensation. Then the breath goes by itself.
Just a couple of things that worked for me.
Don't stress either!
Just watching the breath without interfering is the practice. You are learning to let go of being the controller or doer and just being the knower.
You are learning to let go of being the controller or doer and just being the knower.
Of course but that's easier said than done. Any practical tips here?
Hi All,
Thanks for your replies.
Actually I try to do metta meditation before I sit, but I think saying those lines of metta meditation has become a daily routine activity for me, as even though I say those lines in my mind, but I do not feel anything for those lines. May be I am doing the metta meditation in wrong way. Any suggestions here, please. Thanks in advance. If anybody wants, then I can write here the lines of metta meditation, which I say in my mind before sitting.
"There is the case where a monk, having gone to the wilderness, to the shade of a tree, or to an empty building, sits down folding his legs crosswise, holding his body erect, and setting mindfulness to the fore.[1] Always mindful, he breathes in; mindful he breathes out.
"[1] Breathing in long, he discerns, 'I am breathing in long'; or breathing out long, he discerns, 'I am breathing out long.' [2] Or breathing in short, he discerns, 'I am breathing in short'; or breathing out short, he discerns, 'I am breathing out short.' [3] He trains himself, 'I will breathe in sensitive to the entire body.'[2] He trains himself, 'I will breathe out sensitive to the entire body.' [4] He trains himself, 'I will breathe in calming bodily fabrication.'[3] He trains himself, 'I will breathe out calming bodily fabrication.'
The instructions couldn't be any simpler. Go to a quiet place where there is no disturbance.
If anybody wants, then I can write here the lines of metta meditation, which I say in my mind before sitting.
The lines themselves are not so important as the feeling, but it's worth spending a little time on this. Simple is probably best, but do what works for you. "May I be well, may I happy, may I free from suffering" is one version. Or just send yourself loving vibes!
A smile helps too.
It's a way for him to learn to relate to his breathing in a natural, non-fuss, non-nonsense way, till it becomes second-nature.
You relate to your breathing naturally off the cushion, it will come naturally on the cushion.
Apparently OP and @lobster understood what I meant.
Great advice from everyone. The above is one of the tactics I was taught and found useful. The out breath physically is associated with relaxation and letting go. In breath with focus and concentration.
Learning to smile at the breath can be done by doing breath attention in yoga postures. Holding five postures for a minute each will provide a five minute pre-meditation.
I've found that a smile appears naturally when the practice is "working".
I tend to have the same problem, the second I think of my breath, I cannot just observe, but I go to manually controlling it.
I have found that simple props work really well. I started using candles and focused on the flame. Eventually, the candle scent had made a connection with my brain well enough that I could stay focused (or not focused, lol). Visualizations help some, too, which is something my teacher encourages us to use. The one that worked best for me was to imagine a feather at the tip of your nose, and when you exhale, the feather floats off, and when you inhale it comes back. It's still related to your breathing but allows a single point of concentration that isnt solely the breath. After that, you will find it comes more naturally to not seek to manually control the breathing.
Natural would suggest peace and comfort for the most part. Unnatural is when we try too add or do something that isn't necessary.
I agree. That's why I was focussing on being relaxed earlier in the thread.
My teacher offers alternatives too.
You have focus on pure objects, such as the bindu on the forehead of an image of the buddha. There are impure objects, such as a spot on the the flooor or shrine. Color visualizations are useful, especially if you want to reduce execess conceptualization. The feather technique you mention is very common. Sometimes, counting breaths get a little too conceptual, so visualizing the number, rather than saying/thinking one, two three to yourself, can be helpful as well. You can also move towards vipassana and use the sensations of breathing as a focus.
I sometimes use the glowing tip of an incense stick or a candle flame.
Lots of ways to meditate.
Hi,
This is normal to a certain extent
. You're meditative awareness is not yet strong enough - just keep going and you will get it 
Oh absolutely. Everyone goes through it.
I call it "observer's dilemma" - by observing something you alter it.
I presented this little "dilemma" to my meditation instructor once. "How do I deal with this?" was the question. His response was classic and spot-on:
It's just another thought.
Changed everything.
Brilliant haha