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An Interesting Puzzle...
Will_Baker
Vermont Veteran
in Meditation
I had a business meeting yesterday afternoon. On the drive home I felt rather odd yet I remained mindful. This odd feeling lasted until I went to sleep and was with me in the morning. I meditated on it, figured it out and thought I'd share.
It is my experience that the act of "watching" (read: identifying) emotions come allows them to go. But in this instance, this odd feeling actually turned out to be a mixture of frustration, anger and impatience almost all in equal measure. As I watched my thoughts, none of these emotions rose to a prime level. But, rather they all combined into a sort of soup that was quite indiscernible. As soon as I figured out what was going on, I laughed, the feeling vanished and that was that...
2
Comments
...Why 'puzzle'....?
The puzzle for me was in identifying what (the emotions) I was dealing with. It wasn't a case of, "wow I'm angry and frustrated and a little impatient." It was a case of "I'm feeling odd." After meditating on it, the "odd" feeling turned out to be a conglomeration of anger/frustration/impatience. For me, if, for example, anger arises in the space of my mind, I note its presence and watch it, and in doing so, it usually goes away. However, until this little puzzle was solved, the odd feeling remained...
I get you now... I had a similar experience on Sunday Morning... a feeling of...'malaise', disquiet.... it eventually turned out to be frustration due to a situation I as involved in but had no control over.... Once I 'got' it, it subsided.....
I don't think that's uncommon, emotions often do get all muddled up like that. You could just note "conglomeration".
-Yup, exactly; in this case it was the "getting it" part I had the problem with.
:-) Unfortunately, the little yellow man in my head requires specificity...
Why is the little man in your head yellow @Will_Baker?
And a more pertinent questioning requires me in my quest, to ask you, for the sake of my understanding, why does his yellow mannishness demand something so specific?
...\lol/...
I thought maybe Homer Simpson is his alter ego or sumthin'.
-We'll have to ask the Kinks why the little fellow is male and yellow ;-)
As to the specificity question: for me, the more specific my observation is of it, the more detached from the emotion I become.
:-)
My cousin was a real punk... The Kinks...
For those who don't get it or who may not get the reference:
Yes, that does seem to be the effect of mindfulness. I think of it as putting some space around the emotion, it gives a bigger perspective.
That points to a better process of mindfulness and detachment than 'big f* cking gnarly volcanic magma-bursting-through-the-surface f* cking nightmare please-kill-me".
That made me clench my teeth. Aren't words funny....?
Yeah, it makes me clench mine too, which is my first clue there's a metric ton of SELF ME ME ME getting in the way!
-With a side of Dukkha...
And Dhamma peas with fried onions...
Namo tassa, bhaji biryani podadum....