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Need Advice!
Hi everyone! I am very new to this site, but after reading a few forums I thought that this was a great place with supportive people.
I am also new to Buddhism, I am learning about it and am just starting meditation. My next step is going to the temple and meeting with a meditation instructor so that they can help me answer any questions. The problem is that I am really nervous to take that step. I don't really know why, except that I get butterflies in my stomach and sweaty palms even thinking about it. I have tried once and didn't make it inside. I think that I am scared that the people there might judge me or think I am really dumb because of how little I know. Plus, it is a very small community and I am going to be this outsider that no one knows.
I am aware of how dumb this all sounds, but if anyone has any advice I would really appreciate it!
Thanks
~ Andrea :sadc:
I am also new to Buddhism, I am learning about it and am just starting meditation. My next step is going to the temple and meeting with a meditation instructor so that they can help me answer any questions. The problem is that I am really nervous to take that step. I don't really know why, except that I get butterflies in my stomach and sweaty palms even thinking about it. I have tried once and didn't make it inside. I think that I am scared that the people there might judge me or think I am really dumb because of how little I know. Plus, it is a very small community and I am going to be this outsider that no one knows.
I am aware of how dumb this all sounds, but if anyone has any advice I would really appreciate it!
Thanks
~ Andrea :sadc:
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Comments
You're a much stronger man than I, comic, because I was TERRIFIED the first time I went to a temple. Call it catholic upbringing, call it american ignorance, call it what you want. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life.
Welcome to the site, andreajm
I'm not stronger Brian. I just refuse to live my life in fear. Being a victim and feeling helpless is the worst feeling in the world.
You don't say what sort of temple you have locally. If they are Tibetans, my guess is that you will be overwhelmed with kindness and won't be able to stop grinning for days afterwards!
Let me put it this way. Two years after I started going to the local Thai temple, I had the opportunity to visit Wat Thai in Washington, DC. Now, by this time I am perfectly comfortable in the etiquette and motions of a normal Thai temple visit. I didn't know EXACTLY where the temple was (it happens to be in Silver Springs, MD). I was in DC on business and I had about 5 hours to kill on a Sunday, so I decided to take the Metro to the end of the Red line, and figured I'd be able to find the temple from there. Little did I know that the temple was about 4 miles UPHILL from the last metro stop, so I ended up walking quite a ways, and by the time I arrived I was flushed, out of breath, sweaty, and generally a mess.
Okay, so here's the scenario: White american stranger, sweaty, red faced, and out of breath. I show up and there are about 20 thai women standing outside. They had just finished up with lunch and were cleaning the kitchen and taking a break outside to enjoy the air. I walk up and perform a wai (traditional thai greeting) and before I can finish, I am literally GRABBED and shoved into the kitchen. This older woman sits me down on a stool at the kitchen prep table, and all of this food just starts APPEARING IN FRONT OF ME. They bring me bowl after bowl of food and offer me water and pepsi and fruit juice and just everything they had. THEY WEREN'T EVEN SPEAKING ENGLISH - they didn't ask, they just fed me
When I was done, I got a tour of the place from a woman who spoke good english. They were doing fruit carving lessons, traditional Thai music in another room, and Thai reading lessons for kids in another. It was a beautiful visit, everyone was simply lovely.
This is just how Thai people are. They are so friendly that you can barely believe it. Nobody ever asked me my name, nor why I was there, or where I was from.
A nation of Buddhists
I first visited the temple I attend roughly 6 years ago. I had been reading up on a Buddhism and had reached the point that I needed to actually speak to someone. In metro-Detroit, where I live, there are a few scattered temples -- I think there were roughly 4 in driving distance for me.
I went ahead and called all of them. Two of them didn't answer, one was a wierd hippy lady who turned me off, and one was a kind monk from Thailand who offered to talk to me that day.
Was is scary? Sure, a little. But I felt at home right away.
I've been going ever since. I'm sure you'll be fine.
Once you get there all the fears you have now should be dispelled, and you'll slowly become more and more comfortable with your surroundings. I think, in reality, we just become more and more comfortable with ourselves; the more we expose ourselves to, and the more we realize we can be adapt the most any situation so long as we try, the stronger we become.
Good luck.
Hello Andrea,
Welcome to the site! I look forward to getting to know you better. I am also relatively new to Buddhism myself. I am a Nichiren Buddhist and I am a member of a Soka Gakkai International Community Center in Indianapolis, Indiana. I live in Anderson, Indiana. This community center is the only one in Indiana. Like you, I was somewhat apprehensive about going in and asking questions but I was quickly made to feel right at home. I wonder why most of us experience such apprehension but I guess that is because we are just human beings! Who knows? LOL!
Adiana
I'd be willing to bet we did. The Zen Center in Detroit sounds hippy-tastic to me. I could never get in touch with the Korean Zen Center, and the Sacred Mountain Monestary was equally difficult to contact.
I'm glad I found the MBMC. I think we all lucked out with them.
I to am working up the courage to go into a temple. Its a little hard..:) I know how you feel.
Someone asked what kind of Temple I am planning on going to. It is Shambhala International, an international community of 165 meditation centers founded by Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, and now led by Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche. They were the only temple in San Antonio to respond to my phone calls and e-mails. If anyone knows anything about this community please let me know.
Again, Thank You!
It is tough having to reach out. I did the same with one of the local area sanghas and never heard from them. Their loss. I'm lucky to have so many sanghas around here. But again, when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. I thought that kind of silly until I met my current teacher, because he and I are alot a like in personality. And we both have the same sense of humor. But keep trying.