Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Examples: Monday, today, last week, Mar 26, 3/26/04
Welcome home! Please contact lincoln@newbuddhist.com if you have any difficulty logging in or using the site. New registrations must be manually approved which may take up to 48 hours. Can't log in? Try clearing your browser's cookies.

In what ways does one not yet enlightened but following the path conduct themselves? [Relationships]

FleaMarketFleaMarket Newbie, not Veteran
edited March 29 in Buddhism Basics

I fear I may have missed a lecture or two on relationships growing up. I am having difficulty narrowing down my focus.
I did not phrase these questions as seeking that of an enlightened point of view as I do not yet have confidence in my ability and would like to establish a base from which to cultivate deeper understanding.

  • In what ways does one not yet enlightened but following the path conduct themselves within friend-circles and family?

  • In what ways does one not yet enlightened but following the path conduct themselves when determining a friend?

  • When building a friendship?

  • Establishing healthy boundaries?

  • In what ways does one not yet enlightened but following the path conduct themselves when a loved one desires more than one can provide and in not providing to the loved one, the loved one is hurt?

  • In what ways would one not yet skillful in these methods of conduct become aware of such ignorance and how might practice take shape?

Shoshin1

Comments

  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran
    edited March 29

    In a nutshell answer to all the questions

    I guess one would conduct oneself in a Sati, Metta and Karuna manner, that is, being mindful, using loving kindness and compassion to overcome difficulties and to connect with others and this from what I gather comes from ongoing practice...

    Tis said that 'Love' conquers all ...


    “The time of our delusion does not obstruct the time of our realization. Our practice is not in order to attain realization. Practice itself is the actualization of realization."

    ~Dogen~

    FleaMarketlobster
  • BunksBunks Australia Veteran

    Can I suggest you're perhaps over thinking this?

    Just try to be nice to people.

    But if they're not nice in return then it probably depends on the relationship as to how you respond. I have a tweenage daughter who can be a right little s**t at times but she's my daughter so I stick it out and love her regardless. However, if it were a friend behaving in such a way I'd give them a few chances (apparently the Buddha suggested 7) then kick 'em to the curb......I've had to do this once or twice before.

    But that's just me.

    Shoshin1FleaMarketlobsterKotishka
  • FleaMarketFleaMarket Newbie, not Veteran

    @Bunks said:
    Can I suggest you're perhaps over thinking this?

    You may. I am.

    I overthink because I suffer.
    I suffer because I overthink.

    As it pertains to relationships, this may be a knot a step or so ahead of where I perceive myself capable of untangling.

    Shoshin1Bunks
  • Shoshin1Shoshin1 Veteran

    I overthink because I suffer.
    I suffer because I overthink.

    (In time) this too shall pass @FleaMarket ....

    FleaMarketBunks
  • lobsterlobster Veteran

    In what ways does one not yet enlightened but following the path conduct themselves? [Relationships]

    Well!
    As well as we can.

    You, I and every sentient existence is not perfect. Just so you know. Oh you did know …

    BunksFleaMarket
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    The way you conduct yourself is up to you. Be Mindful, and practise Right Compassion, not Idiot Compassion.
    How others conduct themselves is up to them. You cannot ever hope to change anyone. The best you can do is to be an inspirational influence.

    "Measure it twice lad; you'll only cut it the once."

    FleaMarketBunks
  • lobsterlobster Veteran

    @FleaMarket said:
    As it pertains to relationships, this may be a knot a step or so ahead of where I perceive myself capable of untangling.

    For now.

    We do increase in ability, qualities, capacity. As we learn to observe, listen, experience arisings without judgement, so too does this stillness activate outward.

    BunksFleaMarket
  • DavidDavid A human residing in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. Ancestral territory of the Erie, Haudenosaunee, Huron-Wendat, Mississauga and Neutral First Nations Veteran

    @FleaMarket;

    There is a book by Franz Metcalf my first wife got me years ago called "What Would Buddha Do?"

    May sound funny but it has quite a few scenarios and I found it very insightful.

    FleaMarketBunks
Sign In or Register to comment.