Shedding Dead Religious "Form" - a poem

Dimmesdale

My Rival Religious

---

I envy you
You have it so mapped out
You, who walk the walk instead
of merely talking,
You,
That live out the truth
daily.
Who do not shirk from responsibility
but do it with a whole heart and
entirely as a not-a-insincere gesture
You, who have it sooo mapped out
and sooo naturalized, your
habitual virtues
and your
spiffy prayers
that are not puffed up
You are really the Christ sons
so talked about
or at least you are
normal people who
are attempting something
real and
admittedly non-
pretentious.
At the least,
you are not bored
but trying, and doing
and getting some sort of glint out of things
You, are really something
Some act of worth
Some act of truth
Something that's more than an act
Something that has substance behind it
Precisely because it doesn't carry about itself
An undisturbed aura of substance
I really,
Can't deny this.
This, qualitativeness
Of yourself
most truly.
You are
a People
a People of God
to which I must fall away
and slink away
apart
and know that I
am a nobody
a nobody in the sight of you
and a nobody in the sight of God
even a nobody in the sight of
the cool kids but
I have my own path
and it is my own path
and I belong to it
Because it belongs to me
And I don't Need your Rival Religious
I don't Need your sympathy
Or Condescension
I still think aspects of your religion are ridiculous
and all things considered I think Very well of Myself
as Above you, however
I will admit that
As my rival religious
You are something I do think of with Envy
And I know that in order to grow
I must cease doing that
Because it isn't Spiritual!
And I must fall apart
Because destruction is the end
For which I seek
A dismal end perhaps
But it must occur
Because the Real is coming
And I am that Real
And you are also Real
And everything is Real
Except illusion
And I will in the end be victorious
Because I am life
And Life needs no script
No spiffy prayers,
And no, Life just needs Problems.
Because Problems Test.
And in the End everything, even Spirituality
Is a Problem.
I will get something done.
I will arrive some place, some where.
It is my own place.
I want what I want.
I am hurtling
Towards that which carries my name
And I am that, which longs for
Things,
And I am a person,
Maybe without Love
Maybe without Care.
But I am
And I remain as I am
And You are my Rival Religious.
And I Envy you.
So be it.
I close my eyes and think of other things.
This is all nonsense.
Amen.

lobster

Tee Hee

Or as we say
buy reply
you weighs your
options
and pays Nothing
Bye The Way