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Negativity in the workplace
I need some help dealing with alot of negativity in my workplace. It is affecting some aspects of my life including my emotional states and meditation practice. This is a situation that I can't walk away from at the moment, so I have to deal with it.
Like I said there is alot of negativity in my workplace. It is prevalent in all the departments where I work. Almost everyone is angry with each other, at a group of people (department vs. department), or just being at work. Everyone is out to blame each other for problems, point out another’s mistake in a public forum, in-fighting within departments, and avoiding working with each other. There is a lot of gossip and politics involved. Every company has these problems to some extent, but this place has taken it to an extreme level. Basically, a lot of un-happy people whose only joy at work is making other people as un-happy as they are.
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So how is this affecting me? I work in one of the “lesser” (from a political standing point of view) departments so we usually get the brunt of the anger. I feel like a man with a bull’s eye on his forehead. (the co-workers in my department feel the same way) This is creating a lot of fear and anxiety for me. I am also acting more like them. I find myself getting caught up in their anger, wrongful speech, and being hurtful to others. Thankfully, the meditation has helped me recognize when this is happening and to be more mindful (only some of the time). This wasn’t much of a issue when I first started working there. But over time it has accumulated to a point where it has become very problematic. I have to deal with more and more negative thoughts along with the fear and anxiety emotions they generate during my waking hours. It is also affecting my dreams. It is requiring more mediation practice just to “make it through the day”. I already am an anxious person (I believe this is a learned behavior from my father) which I am dealing with using meditation. One particular aspect of the emotion fear that I am having to deal with is what I call ‘fear of fear’. This is very low grade, in the background, persistent and with no identifiable source. It is most prevalent on Sunday nights and weekday early mornings before my first sitting. It is a fear of something happening at work that I will have to be fearful of.
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What can I do? How do I deal with this negativity? How can I prevent it from affecting me so much? How should I deal with this ‘fear of fear’?
<o>:p> </o>:p>
Thanks
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<o>:p> </o>:p>
Like I said there is alot of negativity in my workplace. It is prevalent in all the departments where I work. Almost everyone is angry with each other, at a group of people (department vs. department), or just being at work. Everyone is out to blame each other for problems, point out another’s mistake in a public forum, in-fighting within departments, and avoiding working with each other. There is a lot of gossip and politics involved. Every company has these problems to some extent, but this place has taken it to an extreme level. Basically, a lot of un-happy people whose only joy at work is making other people as un-happy as they are.
<o>:p> </o>:p>
So how is this affecting me? I work in one of the “lesser” (from a political standing point of view) departments so we usually get the brunt of the anger. I feel like a man with a bull’s eye on his forehead. (the co-workers in my department feel the same way) This is creating a lot of fear and anxiety for me. I am also acting more like them. I find myself getting caught up in their anger, wrongful speech, and being hurtful to others. Thankfully, the meditation has helped me recognize when this is happening and to be more mindful (only some of the time). This wasn’t much of a issue when I first started working there. But over time it has accumulated to a point where it has become very problematic. I have to deal with more and more negative thoughts along with the fear and anxiety emotions they generate during my waking hours. It is also affecting my dreams. It is requiring more mediation practice just to “make it through the day”. I already am an anxious person (I believe this is a learned behavior from my father) which I am dealing with using meditation. One particular aspect of the emotion fear that I am having to deal with is what I call ‘fear of fear’. This is very low grade, in the background, persistent and with no identifiable source. It is most prevalent on Sunday nights and weekday early mornings before my first sitting. It is a fear of something happening at work that I will have to be fearful of.
<o>:p> </o>:p>
What can I do? How do I deal with this negativity? How can I prevent it from affecting me so much? How should I deal with this ‘fear of fear’?
<o>:p> </o>:p>
Thanks
<o>:p> </o>:p>
<o>:p> </o>:p>
0
Comments
It has been my task, in the past, to mediate in situations such as you describe. As I gather that you are speaking of a large organisation, what are the HR arrangements? Is there any EAP provison?
why would any of this matter?
anyhow,
yes being mindful in your work place and meditating would help much to allow you to see what happen inside of you when you react in ways that cause you to suffer from anger or stress..
So keep going, you seem to be making much progress already.
are you familiar with Ajahn Brahm?
his dhamma talk are usually focussed on "real life problems".
http://www.youtube.com/user/BuddhistSocietyWA
good luck
It sucks to be in your position as it sounds very nasty. To deal with this sort of negativity is similar in how we should we deal with all types of negativity in other aspects of our lives - recognising the 'truth', mindfulness, understanding, and compassion!
Yes I recognise that your feelings and emotions are being continually being tested daily. People being bitches, sniping, and nasty causing harm every where you look. It affects others and it affects you. What do you do? And how can we stop this feeling? And maybe how can we stop of all this negativity?
Understand that for every scenario/situation there is an underlying cause or reason. Some of these could include that these people are possibly hurting inside or even oblivious to their own behaviour. The reasons can be simple or even complicated. But once you understand that people behave badly for known or unknown reasons, you can see the situtation for what it really is - people upset/not intelligent/inconsiderate/etc. causing havoc in the workplace.
In the context of Buddhism, this is linked to the first noble truth - life causes suffering. People/scenarios will inevitably cause suffering. A lot of it is beyond our own control and it will occur with or without our presence. But how we deal with this suffering is dependant on our perception of each individual case or situation. We have the ability within to alter the perception of every scenario and therefore control the resulting emotions. But how do we do that? Through mindfulness, understanding and compassion!
When you are mindful and you understand, you no longer require mediation to "get through the day" because all those perceived negative events are no longer negative. They are just events and remain as events at a given point in time, therefore there should be no 'attached' emotions to these events. Everything in this world is impernanent. The bad deed done by an employee today was just a bad deed committed today. The resulting effect of that bad deed tomorrow will be that person's karma. But the bad deed is just a bad deed, it is what it is, nothing more, nothing less (hehehe you following???!!). Acceptance of that simple truth and understanding why that person committed a bad deed will ultimately assist you in letting go of your anguish.
As your 'power' of understanding grows greater so will your 'power' of compassion.You will develop the desire to implement positive effects on these people. However, this will require a lot of other skills too. So in the first instance, if you want to improve your environment then change must begin from within. Improve yourself by being mindful of your surroundings and the people around you. Understand why things occur the way they do and you will find inner peace. And perhaps your inner peace can potentially radiate over your workplace.
Of course, Patbb, inner peace is not situational and I was not suggesting that it is.
What I was addressing was a wider problem that Peacefull-dude was raising. What he describes appears to be organisation-wide. Simply to have inner peace whilst those around us are still suffering from an unacceptable regime appears to me to fall into the self-satisfaction and distancing that is often a criticism levelled at Buddhists. Whilst we can develop our inner peace, doing so without, at the same time, acting to clean up a 'mess' around us, does not sound too skillful.
In a bullying environment, we have a number of choices of we are to stay within it: e.g.
* knuckle under and be a 'victim';
* join the bullies;
* blow the whistle.
None of these courses of action will be comfortable and too many people are forced out of their jobs by this sort of bad behaviour. An employer has a duty of care towards employees and the psychological damage of such situations is well documented.
If it is possible, I'd suggest reading a book called "The Diamond Cutter: The Buddha on Managing Your Business and Your Life" by Geshe Michael Roach. It focuses on issues in the workplace, and is a first hand accounting of the experience of American business from a Buddhist teacher. I have read it, and found much of the advice directly applicable to business challenges I was facing in my own companies.
It sounds like a situation that you could use this kind of help on, and I hope you find peace.
With warmth,
Matt