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Something I've come to realize
This was posted in the lotus loung in one of the sticky threads, but I thought I'd share it with you here in more depth.
I've come to realize that your insight into life can be much more wise by seeing everybody as a teacher. All interaction with people can teach you something, if you know how to look at it. When somebody wants to educate you, to help you understand soemthing, they're your teacher (obviously). but, when somebody wants to attack you, put you down, get angry with you, these people are just as much educators too. I realized this when a few days ago I was in an argument and thought of a good snappy comeback, though an attacking one. but I decided it would be wisest to bite my tounge. after about 10 seconds the urge to make this argument-winning comment subsided and I was looking at the situation much more clearly. Rather than getting angry and "winning" the debate, I analysed the attacking comments that were directed at me and thought of the ignorance of mind that had created such an interaction. I also realized that all this person was doing, and all I would be doing, is reinforcing the negativity and bitterness within. the argument would be won, but winning the argument would bring about no change in opinion, and both parties would walk away only with bitterness. Innevitably, arguing solely for the purpose of proving you're right has no bennefit and exists only to satisfy the ego.
Hence, by stepping back and looking at the cause of the mindset of the opponent, I was able to gain much more insight than simply winning a conflict.
I hope that all came out making sense to everybody else lol, but this is what I mean when I say everybody is a teacher, since there are 2 ways of learning how to overcome the obstacles one creates for their self, that being by learning from an instructor, or observing and understanding the ignorance in someone else that created such illusion.
I've come to realize that your insight into life can be much more wise by seeing everybody as a teacher. All interaction with people can teach you something, if you know how to look at it. When somebody wants to educate you, to help you understand soemthing, they're your teacher (obviously). but, when somebody wants to attack you, put you down, get angry with you, these people are just as much educators too. I realized this when a few days ago I was in an argument and thought of a good snappy comeback, though an attacking one. but I decided it would be wisest to bite my tounge. after about 10 seconds the urge to make this argument-winning comment subsided and I was looking at the situation much more clearly. Rather than getting angry and "winning" the debate, I analysed the attacking comments that were directed at me and thought of the ignorance of mind that had created such an interaction. I also realized that all this person was doing, and all I would be doing, is reinforcing the negativity and bitterness within. the argument would be won, but winning the argument would bring about no change in opinion, and both parties would walk away only with bitterness. Innevitably, arguing solely for the purpose of proving you're right has no bennefit and exists only to satisfy the ego.
Hence, by stepping back and looking at the cause of the mindset of the opponent, I was able to gain much more insight than simply winning a conflict.
I hope that all came out making sense to everybody else lol, but this is what I mean when I say everybody is a teacher, since there are 2 ways of learning how to overcome the obstacles one creates for their self, that being by learning from an instructor, or observing and understanding the ignorance in someone else that created such illusion.
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Comments
You are absolutely right about this. Thanks for reminding me. Amitabha.
You're very right. And you've shown that you are one, too!
thankyou dharmakitten (and everybody else for you kind comments), I think we've all learned a lot from each other here. heh, actually I was just in some other forums and got into a big debate with somebody, and we both got a bit adversarial, but it turns out he was a buddhist too! so we both took a step back and put this very philosophy into practice and certainly learned a lot from each other.
I wish other faith families would behave as well. Mind you, I've come across some pretty nasty debates on Buddhist boards. We are, I think, in a bit of a minority.
I've spent/wasted a great deal of time wandering around bulletin boards, discussion groups and so on. When I started, I was horrified by the level of abuse and 'flaming'. I always hoped - and still hope - that the "soft answer that turneth away wrath" is better than a sharp, even witty, attack.