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Addiction Part II
My friends and family get frusturated with me because I am always stuck on quitting smoking but never seem to follow through with it, so be patient with me in this part two post. I already posted about addiction but I could use some more advice/insight.
I have been trying to prepare myself to quit smoking but I just can't get to the decision that I really want to do it, enough to actually quit. I have read up on a lot of Buddhist ideas, and i know it teaches a lot about compassion and loving kindness. I also read that you first have to have those qualities towards yourself, before you can truly give that to others whole-heartedly, with no intention for getting anything back or feeding your ego.
I have always had a really hard time taking care of myself. I think if I made more of an effort to be compassionate towards myself, that maybe this quitting smoking thing would be a little easier and i may be able to get to that decision faster.
How do I convince myself that I deserve loving-kindness and compassion for myself? If i truly believed that I deserve this too, I feel like I would really not want to smoke because obviously it is terrible for you. How do you cultivate these feelings and qualities for yourself and stick to them??:mad:
I have been trying to prepare myself to quit smoking but I just can't get to the decision that I really want to do it, enough to actually quit. I have read up on a lot of Buddhist ideas, and i know it teaches a lot about compassion and loving kindness. I also read that you first have to have those qualities towards yourself, before you can truly give that to others whole-heartedly, with no intention for getting anything back or feeding your ego.
I have always had a really hard time taking care of myself. I think if I made more of an effort to be compassionate towards myself, that maybe this quitting smoking thing would be a little easier and i may be able to get to that decision faster.
How do I convince myself that I deserve loving-kindness and compassion for myself? If i truly believed that I deserve this too, I feel like I would really not want to smoke because obviously it is terrible for you. How do you cultivate these feelings and qualities for yourself and stick to them??:mad:
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Comments
I am having much the same problem and struggle with a nicotine addiction. Because of this, I cannot offer much help, and would like to hear some others' advice.
This is not something which most people can fruitfully approach from a logical perspective. You won't argue yourself into loving-kindness or compassion for yourself.
If you get angry with yourself, cultivate loving-kindness for the experience of the anger. If you feel desire for something, cultivate compassion for the experience of the desire. I find this approach very fruitful.
For the first time I understand what people mean when they say "you must really want to quit". No shit, if one REALLY wants to quit, quitting is easy. Problem is I know I don't feel like quitting at all.
What worked for me in the past, and what will work in the future if I try again, is seeing it as a part of a whole.
I went to the gym 5 days of week, drank plenty more water, ate less carbs, quit coffee and later alcohol because the triggered it. Exercise is REALLY important. It makes you want to smoke less and less...and helps your body recover from the inside out.
The point is also to work on all fronts with the intent of "I want to be as healthy as I can". I mean, you're only really quitting smoking because of health issues I'm sure. So might as well take health more seriously.
The BIG problem that I foresee is that....hanging out and talking with friends is my favorite activity. Inevitably we end up in a bar for 3 hours or so. I find it difficult to not drink alcohol without smoking and smoking without alcohol....and certainly eve more difficult to quit both while I'm there with friends. What do people actually do during those long times hanging out with friends?... Maybe I need to go home earlier? But it's my favorite part of the whole week/day....I get restless and the conversation isn't ALWAYS super enticing. But the whole ritual of beer and cigarettes was the way out of it.
Anyway, exercize, water, less carbs. And I also drank a lot more tea while out. After a while it really is easy. You just need to be mindful of the triggers. For me they were just a couple of nights out where I drank a little bit more than I usually do, and it triggered the "need for a smoke".
soooo.....I had already quit for two weeks and at first I would smoke still a little bit. But then it started making me really sick so one day I just didn't miss it enough to light one up. Before this happened I had been smoking for about 40 years. Now I cant talk unless I use one of those digital talker's. Please guys don't let it get you too. Try harder.