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What can successfully counteract doubt?

lotuspadmalotuspadma
in Buddhism Basics
It seems fear of the realities that living the Dhamma show us, and a stupid longing to live the common, mundane life has made me disturbed by doubt. In actuality, I do believe that the Dhamma works and it leads to Nibbana, but I do question if that is the meaning of life, if its something to be done. I'm just not very happy letting go of things that used to be delightful. I hate to deprive myself. If Nibbana meant blissful heaven, that would be more motivating to me. Still, in anyway, regardless of this hindrance, I'm still practicing, but I feel so lost! The passion for the teachings is withering away. What can I do to get it back?

Comments

  • MaryAnneMaryAnne Veteran
    Can you be a little more specific?
    Can you tell us exactly what kind of things that once provided you with "delight" which should now be forbidden - in pursuit of NIbbana....

    Are we talking about things like "love" "sex" "relationships" or money in the bank, a nice car, a big house, drinking on the weekends ....what?

    And can you explain to us how and why each of these delightful things (you name) will keep you from walking the path of the Middle Way and observing the precepts and/or 8 fold path?

    A little more information would be helpful :)
  • lotuspadmalotuspadma
    Yes, that's it. Love, beauty, money, nice clothes, nice house, entertainment, the whole nine yards... I know the problem isn't in the things themselves, but how you relate to them, as in 'being attached or aversed to". But most of those things I would have to pursue, and should I get them, I'd be overly infatuated with them. My spirituality would stagnate. I prefer just thinking that what I have is good enough. And only work for what is actually valuable, such as health, family relationships, a career and naturally the Dhamma. The other things I don't actually need. But it's hard to release myself from that wanting, and then I start to think this path is dry and dull.
  • RodrigoRodrigo São Paulo, Brazil Veteran
    But the buddhist path is not an ascetic path. Isn't odd that the path that should release you from suffering is actually causing your suffering?
    Jeffrey
  • lotuspadmalotuspadma
    edited December 2012
    I have a hard time understanding that. I feel that releasing myself from such worldly pursuits would make it a lot easier. Or maybe I'm wrong... But it isn't extreme asceticism, I think.
  • taiyakitaiyaki Veteran
    Then be overly infatuated.
    If that isn't a problem well then you can skip Buddhism.
    If its a problem well then there is a path that will help you towards freedom.
    Not freedom from these things but freedom for these things.

    But its a curious thing.

    On the ultimate playing game of life we cannot really say what life is the better life. The one of extravagance, playing in samsara. Or the one of freedom, centerless nirvana. The illusion is that there is a dichotomy.

    Yet there is a confidence in the heart. No money chasing, women, nor really any vaulted vision of paradise stands up to this freedom straight in the boundless heart.

    The only way to taste the nectar is to plunge nakedly and directly into this moments arising. There we will find an abode where our thoughts mean absolutely nothing. And from there a freedom and rest.

    Doubt is countered by looking at the world. Looking at those you love. And really is there anything else you'd do with your short life span? If so do it.
  • genkakugenkaku Northampton, Mass. U.S.A. Veteran
    @lotuspadma -- I think everyone who practices passes through a variety of self-made hoops. Just about the time you think you have a handle on things -- perhaps, nirvana is good and samsara is bad or a life without the precepts is meaningless but a life with the precepts is no picnic either -- the rug gets pulled out from under you and things seem gloomy indeed.

    This is the usefulness of practice -- the actual-factual, sit-down-and-pay-attention stuff that meditation consists of. Practice brings experience, but practice requires determination and patience ... and doubt. On the cushion, no one is 'good.' On the cushion, no one is 'bad.' On the cushion -- as time passes -- is just on the cushion.

    This understanding gains a footing with actual-factual practice. On the cushion is on the cushion ... just as any other circumstance is just that circumstance. Yeah-but-I-want-to-get-holy is just yeah-but-I-want-to-get-holy. Yeah-but-I-want-to-feel-relief is just yeah-but-I-want-to-feel-relief.

    Given the habits anyone might have, there is no skipping over the determination and effort. Anyone can talk the talk, but walking the walk is a bit harder ... and worth the effort perhaps.

    Best wishes.
  • CittaCitta Veteran
    edited January 2013
    lotuspadma said:

    It seems fear of the realities that living the Dhamma show us, and a stupid longing to live the common, mundane life has made me disturbed by doubt. In actuality, I do believe that the Dhamma works and it leads to Nibbana, but I do question if that is the meaning of life, if its something to be done. I'm just not very happy letting go of things that used to be delightful. I hate to deprive myself. If Nibbana meant blissful heaven, that would be more motivating to me. Still, in anyway, regardless of this hindrance, I'm still practicing, but I feel so lost! The passion for the teachings is withering away. What can I do to get it back?

    Well you might start by considering that there is no difference between common mundane life and Dhamma..its just a matter of perspective.
    If you have a teacher that helps immeasurably..put your concerns to her/him.
  • CinorjerCinorjer Veteran
    @lotuspadma what ever makes you think being Buddhist means we have to "give up" what brings delight into our lives? Mistaking unattachment for rejection is probably the biggest mistake of people trying to follow the Middle Way. If you're not a monk, then stop trying to live a monk's life. The Buddha preached relief from suffering, not rejection of the world. If you're not happy, then sit down and take a long look at your practice.
    CittaDavid
  • Wisdom23Wisdom23 Veteran
    The buddha spoke of the middle way. if you enjoy something dont give it up life will become boring then i myself love quizzes and reading lol but u merely need to reckognise that everything is imperminent and what u look for to bring u happiness is only temporarily going to do so.

    I hope this helps and happy new year
  • misecmisc1misecmisc1 I am a Hindu India Veteran
    edited January 2013
    there is a constant struggle between our defilements and the path. if defilements win, path is destroyed. if path wins, defilements are destroyed. in the end, there is one winner, yet no one wins as there is no one there - nothing is attained as there is no attainer. samsara continues till ignorance exists. samsara ceases when ignorance ceases.
  • ZeroZero Veteran
    lotuspadma said:


    What can I do to get it back?

    Perhaps this is an issue to ponder - what is that you are seeking to get back? If its absence has led you here then examine where here is... in relation to there - and see what it is that you are striving towards and away from.
  • DavidDavid A human residing in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. Ancestral territory of the Erie, Haudenosaunee, Huron-Wendat, Mississauga and Neutral First Nations Veteran
    I don't think it's so bad to want an enjoyable existence while we are here. The problem is when we try to get happiness from external sources or get self worth from things that decay and don't last.

    It's like that biblical understand/misunderstanding. Money isn't the root of all evil, it's the love of money.

    The more we give of ourselves, the richer we become.
  • DavidDavid A human residing in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. Ancestral territory of the Erie, Haudenosaunee, Huron-Wendat, Mississauga and Neutral First Nations Veteran
    Look at your fears and/or discomforts that arise because of what you percieve as a lack.

    Facing fear is the only way to counteract doubt.

    Once you've examined that, whether or not Buddhism is for you will be clear.

    I still think preferences are ok as long as they are not transformed into attachments.
  • footiamfootiam Veteran
    lotuspadma said:

    It seems fear of the realities that living the Dhamma show us, and a stupid longing to live the common, mundane life has made me disturbed by doubt. In actuality, I do believe that the Dhamma works and it leads to Nibbana, but I do question if that is the meaning of life, if its something to be done. I'm just not very happy letting go of things that used to be delightful. I hate to deprive myself. If Nibbana meant blissful heaven, that would be more motivating to me. Still, in anyway, regardless of this hindrance, I'm still practicing, but I feel so lost! The passion for the teachings is withering away. What can I do to get it back?

    I suppose it is healthy to go on questioning but the quality of the question is important. There probably are silly questions with no answers and I read once that, Buddha never answer all questions. There are questions that need elaboration, a yes or no answer or just a silence. If your questions cause so much doubt, seek someone who can clear that doubt. If not stick to what you are sure off. Never mind if there is Nibbana. Why get so worked up and attached to the idea? We are supposed to let go. Let go off Nibbana.
  • DeepankarDeepankar
    Your doubt over dhamma and your personal preferrence is understandable. To a certain extent dhamma in pure bliss is quite scary for some because it may be so silence, lonely and it may be very activities exciting. Usually, the truth is not really understooded in its actual value. As pointed out be @footiam seek someone who can clear your doubt, approach dharmic seniors and venerable in the monastery for assistance.
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    Doubt can arise when you conceptualize self to something that is non-self.
  • driedleafdriedleaf Veteran
    I would say that meditation and experience clears the doubt(s).

    When doubt is present, he knows, "There is doubt in me," or when doubt is not present, he knows, "There is no doubt in me." He knows how the arising of the non-arisen doubt comes to be; he knows how the abandoning of the arisen doubt comes to be; and he knows how the non-arising in the future of the abandoned doubt comes to be.

    http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.010.nysa.html
    Deepankar
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