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Wrong to get 'warm fuzzies' from doing something good?
Jainarayan
Veteran
Here's the thing...
I'm going to be alone for Christmas, which is just fine by me. I like down-time. Husband is going to the family, a ride I can't make (leg and back problems). This is understood by all involved. I've said for a while that I would like to volunteer at a shelter or church dining hall or someplace like that for a holiday. Holidays don't mean that much to me, but they do to a lot of other people, especially people who have no one or nowhere to go. To that end, I know it will make me feel really good inside to help make someone's holiday a little less lonely. Is that a bad thing, to feel good about doing something? Do I just do it and suppress any feeling or emotions about it? Is it un-meritorious or selfish to have the warm fuzzy feelings? I know it probably sounds kind of ocd.
I'm going to be alone for Christmas, which is just fine by me. I like down-time. Husband is going to the family, a ride I can't make (leg and back problems). This is understood by all involved. I've said for a while that I would like to volunteer at a shelter or church dining hall or someplace like that for a holiday. Holidays don't mean that much to me, but they do to a lot of other people, especially people who have no one or nowhere to go. To that end, I know it will make me feel really good inside to help make someone's holiday a little less lonely. Is that a bad thing, to feel good about doing something? Do I just do it and suppress any feeling or emotions about it? Is it un-meritorious or selfish to have the warm fuzzy feelings? I know it probably sounds kind of ocd.
6
Comments
IMO - Nothing wrong with feeling good about what you do for others, as long as you don't expect some sort of "pay back" - its all good.
Being kind and generous to others and reacting to THEIR happiness is a human response. :thumbsup:
Wrong to get 'warm fuzzies' from doing something good?
Jainarayan Member
9:24AM in Buddhism for Beginners Flag
Here's the thing...
Hi Jain: I think warm fuzzy feelings are fine. They are natural pride from doing right action. You should enjoy and have pride in accomplishing something fine. When you go home and start bragging about your generous heart that is a little different. Even then, Pride from right action is not bad karma-still karma forming but so is an eager breath. Emptiness is not a statement that we shouldn't take joy in our work and life or presence.
If we don't develop the grasping after the self in the mandala then the attachment to right action is all good. A Bodhi is not a rock. A suffering attitude in the midst of all of this glory is just out of place and misplaced holiness. Well done on your good heart. Best, Dennis
Yes, my concern was in harboring a feeling of pride. I don't like to broadcast what I've done or what I'm going to do. I think that ruins the karma and merit. Sometimes it comes up in conversation, but I keep my comments about it to a bare minimum. Usually I shrug and say "meh, I have a lot to make up for" and leave it at that. I'm glad to know there's nothing wrong with smiling inside. I will find out if there is a place in my area that does this, and if so I will offer to help. I hope there is.
Short version: Sambhogakaya = "warm fuzzies," so it's all good.
Him: "So what, you want to feel bad about helping? Would that be right?"
Me: "Well, no. That wouldn't be right."
Him: "Then you want to feel nothing at all when observing other's pain or happiness?"
Me: "No, that wouldn't be right, either."
Him: "So it makes you happy when you try to help someone. That's not ego. It's the ego that insists on applause for helping. An example. Metta is helping to build a hospital where one is needed. Ego is what makes you put your name on the side of the building."