Things are better than people?

betaboy

Namaste,

You play music on the keyboard, for instance. It gives you a lot of happiness. You don't experience such happiness with people; far from it, you find people annoying and useless. Is it wrong to feel that way - to see things as more valuable than people?

Thanks,
BB

Cloud

We find value in what we find pleasing. Some people find people more pleasing than things, some people the opposite. The phrase "you don't experience such happiness with people" isn't a truism, it would only apply to some people.

Mr_Serenity

Good relationships with people are the best things life has to offer. But they're rare. They take work, lots of work to create and to maintain. While things like a keyboard for instance may bring you a lot of joy unconditionally. If it does then play that keyboard, play it well, own it. It might be a talent. And through talents like that, nice relationships may come your way.

When you're alone you're the most important person in your life. When there is someone else there with you, they're supposed to be pretty important. It's up to you how much importance you give them.

Gui

Namaste,

You play music on the keyboard, for instance. It gives you a lot of happiness. You don't experience such happiness with people; far from it, you find people annoying and useless. Is it wrong to feel that way - to see things as more valuable than people?

Thanks,
BB

It was a person who created the keyboard. It was a person who taught you to play it.

poptart

The thing to bear in mind is that happiness originates within YOU. It doesn't come from things, or other people. We grasp at the world around us mistakenly thinking that our happiness depends on this thing or that person but it doesn't. You already have all you need to be happy, you only have to make that choice.

tmottes

@betaboy if you look at the history of humans, we basically have spent our entire existence pursuing pleasure and avoiding suffering. We build houses to stay out of the elements, we farm to make our acquisition of food easier, we invent technologies to control everything about our environment, we use technologies like radio, TV, foods, drugs, etc to distract us from that nagging wanting feeling, etc. All these things are "material" things. They are things that we have built to have some feeling of permanence and external control, when in reality we only have impermanence and an ability to have internal control (thoughts, focus, actions). When it comes to other humans we are forced to face something we can't control, no matter our level of technology.

There was a time in my life when I said I hated everybody. They were all annoying and stupid. They would let me down or worse do things out of malice. Then I had an awakening of sorts (which has been going on since then). I didn't hate the world, I hated myself. My viewpoint on the world was merely a reflection of my feelings about myself. Now when I feel annoyed, defensive, angry, etc, I have to ask myself what part of me is causing this. Indubitably, I can always find it and see it for what it is, my ignorance. At first I found it annoying that all my suffering was "my" fault. As I started to practice buddhism and learned that I could have control over my thoughts and actions, I realized that what was once annoying is actually quite liberating. As I slowly release my clinging to these impermanent things (my feelings, perceptions, even consciousness), I begin to realize they are not me. As I realize these things are not me, I release my clinging to these impermanent things.

I suggest you take a really long hard look at why you find other people to be "annoying and useless". This will be your answer to your question.

vixthenomad

Namaste,

You play music on the keyboard, for instance. It gives you a lot of happiness. You don't experience such happiness with people; far from it, you find people annoying and useless. Is it wrong to feel that way - to see things as more valuable than people?

Thanks,
BB

I wouldn't say it's 'wrong' as such - but (and this is NOT a medically qualified opinion) it is a possible indicator of Asperger Syndrome.

riverflow

Is it wrong to feel that way - to see things as more valuable than people?

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being introverted or simply not a very gregarious person.

I wouldn't put it in terms of more or less "valuable" but simply where your own natural inclinations lie. There;s nothing wrong with that and you shouldn't have to force yourself to be someone you aren't.

As for myself, I prefer two or three friends I can be honest with rather than have dozens of people I can't even talk about things of substance. Quality over quantity. Less is more.

riverflow

A funny article, but with some truth too:

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2003/03/caring-for-your-introvert/2696/

genkaku

Things and pets are easier than people. They don't talk back. This is probably one of the reasons we revere the dead ... they can't talk back.

Floating_Abu

It can be an opportunity for practice, I guess, betaboy. I also find it much easier to be kind when no-one is pulling my strings

Namaste.

zen_world

People are not useless...On the contrary...they are your teacher. You learn more about yourself when you are around people. A lot of the problems you see in other people are actually your own projections and your own problems. People are great teachers if you can manage to accept yourself as a student.

DhammaDhatu

You play music on the keyboard, for instance. Is it wrong to feel that way - to see things as more valuable than people?

Music offers very sublime pleasure, just as deep meditation offers more sublime pleasure than music. In relation to pleasurable feelings, what you said can often be true. Music can offer more pleasure than people.

But having regarding to the question of "what is more valuable"...this is different than what offers greater pleasure. People may be more "valuable" than music.

driedleaf

It's really just our sense consciousness that decides whether something is pleasurable or not. Thinking that something is pleasurable or not pleasurable that is outside of our sense consciousness will lead to attachment. I guess that's fine if you are happy with that attachment, and it doesn't hurt you.