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Is it impossible to cling to clarity?
Jeffrey
Veteran
I had the idea that in my walking meditation I wanted clarity on feeling connected yet calm. And no matter how many ties I tried there would never be a way to 'get' and always have it.
By clarity I mean knowing. How to help. How to be. What to value. What to say.
Grasping at a clarity that wasn't there made me angry.
By clarity I mean knowing. How to help. How to be. What to value. What to say.
Grasping at a clarity that wasn't there made me angry.
0
Comments
In the beginning, everyone wants to get something out of Buddhism -- calm, clarity, compassion, emptiness, freedom, meaning, love, an explanation, or some highly-ornate vision of what enlightenment might be. And whatever it is they want, they want it in the same way they want a raise from the boss or a piece of information they can store in their minds -- "this is mine!" All this stuff is par for the course and nothing to get your knickers in a twist about. It's what you might call the hope and belief phase.
Hope and belief put all of us on the path and encourage us, but it is experience that takes us home ... plain old walking-around experience... nothing sexy. Experience comes from an actual-factual, sit-down-and-shut-up practice. It doesn't come because anyone 'wants' it to come. It arises all by itself, like steam from boiling water.
So, begin with the wanting stuff, the belief stuff, the hope stuff ... and practice. Will it be a smooth and unencumbered ride -- some shazzam lightbulb that goes on and stays on? Nope. There will be anger and frustration and cuss words and tears and hug-me-I'm-a-Buddhist compassion and all sorts of other trip wires. Too bad ... practice anyway. A Hindu swami told me once, "If the screw took sixteen turns to put in, it will take sixteen turns to take out." Long-standing habits are a rough cob. Too bad ... practice anyway.
Find the one who insists on clarity and you can hang up your Buddhist track suit and go home.
In the meantime, practice.
In actuality if one has even a glimpse of presence/awareness, they will suffer a lot.
Why? because they will try to recreate it and not only that they will compare/contrast all experience with it.
but imho clarity is always apparent, thus it isn't something one has to try to create or manufacture. clarity is the natural presence of the 18 dhatus.
emphasizing the emptiness aspect helps with balancing the clarity aspect. clarity must always have the lack of essences as the base.
just my casual opinionated answers =].