What would the Buddha do?

broomhill

I find myself being interrupted when trying to speak in a social setting at times. I feel like people aren't that interested in what I have to say and they don't seem to listen to me. I sometimes feel like i'm just being silenced.
I want to be social but what do I do when people just won't ever let me add to the conversation or if when I do they are constantly interrupting me or talking over me. I'm new to Buddhism and i'm trying to learn new things but...i'm fully human. Advice?

vinlyn

First, I don't see what your topic title has to do with the question you ask.

But, find new friends.

Yishai

If there are multiple conversation happening. Say... 8+ people in the group. Then it's likely that people will get distracted. Don't be offended when that happens.

If you are talking to just a couple people, and they are still ignoring you, then like vinlyn said. Get new friends.

lobster

Speak louder and continue speaking.
Try not to be so boring.

. . . social tips for Buddhists? m m m . . . people do interrupt . . . I do it. I suppose people do not interrupt what they want to hear. What are you saying?

pegembara

If you have nothing interesting to say, don't say anything. If people are not interested in what you say, they are not interested in you. You have 2 choices: Change yourself or change the people you mix with.

robot

Watch and listen. Is anyone else being heard? What's their secret? Why is it working for them?
Most people don't really listen to others story unless they are trying to find a way to make it about their own story.
Maybe just say things that get people talking about themselves. Then they might listen to you.

how

Most social conversations with practicing Buddhists that I know are deliberately inclusive of all the participants. The social conversation is just another meditation practice.
That means holding your speech until there is a room for it, being mindful that what you say does not foster greed/hate or delusion/ avoid monopolizing the conversational space, don't split off the focus or the sharing of the the conversation by pairing off with another person, remembering that the social interaction is not about you but is about everyone.
It is not as easy to do in the world where self centerness is king but it still has great value as a reminder of why you are practicing.

lobster

I'm new to Buddhism and i'm trying to learn new things but...i'm fully human. Advice?

The Buddha might say:
'Thank you for interrupting. I will contemplate my response!'
and then say nothing about it . . .
. . . however 'being Buddha' is not always applicable . . .

You could say something from the 'crazy Buddha' tradition:
such as, 'do you mind if I dance while you talk over me?'

The truth is we don't really know you or what is appropriate for you. My social skills involve snoring when people bore me . . . so probably not the best person to ask or give advice . . . sorry! :buck:

vinlyn

Lobster is correct. I know whenever I read his posts I don my CPAP head gear and turn on the oxygen full blast.

Bunks

I work with a colleague who does this to me.

After a pang of irritation, I silently bow down to her when she ignores me and thank her for the teaching.

Your issue isn't that people ignore you, it is that you're letting your ego get in the way.

Billyboy

What do you think broomhill ? as there are moments when your own Buddha nature will reveal the answers. Just sit and meditate.