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Acceptance and motivation
samson
New
I'm somewhat new to Buddhism, and as I'm learning more I'm finding that I am being bothered by the idea of acceptance. I feel that maybe I'm not informed enough on the matter. If we are to just accept things as they are , where does the motivation for positive change and progress come from ? Also, can anyone offer any good pointers on material that will make it easier for me to not only
learn about Buddhist philosophy, but give me ideas on how to practice it in my everyday life ? Thanks in advance.
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Comments
We're not supposed to accept "things" as they are... we're supposed to accept "the way things work", i.e. the true nature of reality and all things as being selfless & interdependent, temporary, and not the source of ultimate happiness. Meditation is the tool we use to see clearly.
Buddhism is all about bringing our minds (and so thoughts, speech and behavior) into alignment with true reality. The closer we are to that, the more clearly we see, the more effective we are at changing things for the better... and not causing unnecessary suffering to ourselves or others. That's our motivation.
I'm not sure about particular sources to help, but you could start here: http://www.buddhanet.net/e-learning/basic-guide.htm
Thank you, I think I am understanding it more clearly now.
@samson What I said is just a really broad (and scant) overview though, so you'll definitely want to follow that link and look for more stuff to read! It's one thing to say what Buddhism is about, and another thing to actually delve into specifics and apply effort toward bringing about real change in your life based on Buddhist teachings.
That is a very good question, very relevant. It's hard to articulate what acceptance means. It's more about acknowledging 'what is', and has little or nothing to do with whether or not you like it.
You can be in a situation that is 'all wrong' and be in full acceptance that it is happening while planning for a change.
I think 'acceptance' in the "Buddhist sense" is more about being HONEST and refraining from self-delusion. It can be hard to let go of wishful thinking. Sometimes we don't want to know how destructive something is, we'd rather just see what we want to see. Acceptance is accepting 'what is' no matter what we want it to be. We delude ourselves without even trying to.
It prompted me to respond in a new thread of my making. Specifically, the second post....
What @federica said in her other thread. You should actively try and change a situation with wisdom and compassion however, if you can't, accept it with wisdom and compassion!
You should accept what is here but that doesn't preclude any kind of change. Buddhism says there is no such thing that has no change!
Hello :wave: .
Suffering or Dukkha [shudder] - call me old fashioned but just don't like that stuff . . . don't find it acceptable BUT I allow for its inevitably . . . you might say I accept the 4NT (four Noble Truths) . . .
This also brings to a little divide in ideology. Some Buddhists say we are empty of character thus we can change to goodness no matter. Some Buddhists say our underlying nature is goodness (see shrimala devi and ratnogotravibhafa sutras) and we need to uncover the goodness.
In discussing acceptance, I like to consider extreme emotions. If you consider the following example:
Most of us would be absolutely terrified to find ourselves crammed into a box like this. You can feel the panic just thinking about it. Do you really believe these two girls were naturally able to deal with the panic and mental strain without practice? And the practice that would be required, means training oneself to accept the feeling of panic, and learn how to make peace with that fear.
Acceptance like that, makes one's mind incredibly resilient. The more one is able to accept adversity, the stronger their mind is. The youtube example demonstrates how practicing with acceptance gave these young ladies phenomenal strength.
Unfortunately, in Thailand the phenomenon of acceptance of what is happening in one's life is often taken to the extreme by the Buddhist culture there. It ties in with the "mai pben rai" attitude so often expressed by Thais. It has led to a retarded national attitude toward improving life (such as not improving working conditions that all too often lead to life-long disabilities, poverty, etc.).
Indeed, @vinlyn. I found my own personal attitude more in line with the Hindu attitude of "it is what it is, it's your destiny, just live with it."
That is the thought-process that has perpetuated the caste system in India, and kept many countless people in abject poverty.
A state that many, in the lower castes are now rebelling against, due to education, 'enlightenment' (via the web and information being far more readily available).
Changing my mind-set....
Buddhism is about acceptance of the things we cannot change.
But Theravada teacher Phra Prayudh Payutto has an interesting theory about wisely applying the concepts of dependent origination into our lives: if effects hint at causes, it means we can also be the cause of the effects we want to see happening in our lives.
So choose wisely what you would like your life to be like, be as proactive as you can about it, but accept stoically those adverse circumstances that don't depend on you.
Accepting things as they are is also to accept that we can effect change.
If Buddha just accepted things as they are and decided on indifference, he would have rotted under that tree.
Do not be too set on the results you want because although we can guide change to an extent, we can not completely control what we set in motion.
Be mindful and temper your compassion with wisdom and temper your wisdom with compassion. If one is out of step with the other, there is a problem.
Wowie, @ourself, that was an impressive and inspiring post.