... and now the good thoughts ...

lobster

From a less charitable thread:

I'd certainly be interested in hearing some of your own uncharitable thoughts, as long as you don't direct them at me.

It is sometimes true that being uncharitable is a choice, an inclination or a polarity . . .

Personally prefer to be inspired by your charitable thoughts. For example today ... nope can not think of anything ... over to you for kindly inspiration ...

Shoshin

That's very sweet of you @lobster ......(how's that )

federica

I actully don't like the term 'charitable'... For some reason, to me, it sounds (in a theistical sense) religiously patronising and condescending.

"Uncharitable" - as per Nirvana's thread, has a different ring. It is in itself an admonishment for a lack of virtuous, kindly, compassionate feeling, and an unskilful intention we should be ashamed of...

But the word 'Charitable' conjures up images of the well-heeled, dainty, entitled and affluent young victorian lady, in her silk and satin and ample petticoats, with her ermine muff and fur-lined bonnet, leaving a few copper pennies in the metal cup of a child beggar, dressed in rags, bare-footed and freezing (Think traditional 'Victorian-style' nostalgic christmas cards - Oh my goodness, look what I found! )

Even in its well-intentioned goodness, there is a ring of 'look at how kind I am'....

So for me, the essence of 'Good Thoughts' lies in Mindfulness and Skilful Actions.

lobster

Quite right @federica, I perhaps should have asked for 'kind' thoughts. Totally understand the problematic connotations of charitable. Kindness I would suggest is more a gift or bestowing whereas as charitable as you point out is trading. One gets 'heaven', self esteem, feeling superior etc. Not really kind or genuine at all . . .

Today I helped a tourist take a pic of himself against the Houses of Parliament. I would probably not even merit that as kindness, it is just common courtesy. Still awaiting others inspiration ...

genkaku

As a matter of practice, I think both "charitable" (sorry @federica) and "uncharitable" thoughts bring with them snares worth attending to. Yes, it's nice to be nice and it has a better feel to it, perhaps, but have you ever noticed how drip by drop that niceness can become codified and turned into a virtue used to lash those who are less nice? How nice/kind/charitable/compassionate is that in fact?

I guess everyone figures it out on their own terms and in their own time, but the touchstones I tend to refer back to are, "Do not be too virtuous. Too much virtue makes people crazy" (one of the old guys said that, I don't remember which) and "The hard stuff is easy. It's the easy stuff that's hard."

I'm not suggesting that everyone be as crabby and cranky as I can be. Rather, I just think it's worth keeping an eye on.

lobster

thanks @genkaku for that reminder.

The 'my little pony' dharma ultra spirituals. So kind, so considerate, so self effacing, so sickingly sweet ...
They are not real. They are often passive aggressives in denial.

I would suggest real kindness does not have an agenda, it is an expression of wisdom. Perhaps being covertly kind rather than being labeled 'good' for reasons of esteem is a way found in crazy wisdom ... This is one of the attributes of the malamatiyya school of heretical dharma. In fact so heretical it belongs to another religion

and now back to the inspirational kind ...