Tong len is usually translated as "giving and taking" but actually (I learned this yesterday), the practice is to take first, and then give.
What do you take? Pain, and bad karma. What's bad karma? Future pain. So you take present and future pain from someone, dissolve it/destroy it/make it shatter into light and love inside you, and you give them the goodness, the virtue, the joy and the love.
I wanted to share that I've started listening to these lectures on Tonglen
http://www.acidharma.org/aci/online/practices/practice3.html
So far they are really wonderful. Recommending them to anyone who is trying to learn skillful ways to grow their compassion and steadfastly practice toward Enlightenment.
May all the barriers that put up a false distinction between "me" and "you" or dissolve.
Comments
yes sova, Tonglen is a beautiful and powerful practice indeed I think it was Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche that introduced it to the west, could be wrong though. This is something that Pema Chodron discussed extensively in her Noble Heart 12 session retreat. This practice really does bring great joy and peace to your heart.
Namaste