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Self-consciousness
thumbs07
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what is buddhism wisdom of self-consciousness?
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@thumbs07 , exactly what do you mean by Self-Consciousness'? Being embarrassed, timid, self-critical and as if under scrutiny, or Being Conscious of the Self (which by any standards, is associated with 'Not-Self)..?
(I take it you will engage in some dialogue? three posts in little over a year's membership is a little sparse.... )
Could you explain what you mean by "self-consciousness"? Do you mean reflexive awareness of thoughts and feelings, or do you mean awareness of self-view, the sense of "I"? Or something else?
Yeah, that's what I meant. An answer would be welcome before we venture further response, @thumbs07 many thanks.
Yeah federica former type, rather than latter.
It's interesting you have put all those categories together- embarrassment, timidness, self criticalness, under scrutiny. Thats probably accurate.
Ok, thank you for coming back to this!
Well, let's get back to the preliminary basics.
The 4 Noble Truths.
Life is dukkha because we cling and grasp at certain things, in a desperate effort to either keep hold of them, for ever, please, or because actually we recoil form them and wish they didn't exist. That is a form of desire, an attachment toan ideal of perfection.
One of the things we cling to is the gratification of our own Ego.
I have heard it said that a constant feeling of self-consciousness is a form of inverted Ego.
"I'm not good enough, everyone is judging me, I can't do it, I'm embarrassed, I feel scrutinised, I'm not as good as everyone else"... is still a form of 'feeding the Ego'.
It's still drawing attention to yourself, because any from of attention is better than none.
Please don't take this as a poke, or as criticism. it's just an observation of what Self-Consciousness is. Being conscious of yourself. In whichever way - positively, OR negatively - you are holding yourself up to some form of attention.
The Buddha did not address the question of the existence of Self/Not-Self, indicating that such views are dualistic and hamper progress. Anyone who does not understand this, needs to drop any idea of either.
As Thanissaro Bhikkhu says,
"the questions that occur to the mind are not "Is there a self? What is my self?" but rather "Am I suffering stress because I'm holding onto this particular phenomenon? Is it really me, myself, or mine? If it's stressful but not really me or mine, why hold on?" These last questions merit straightforward answers, as they then help you to comprehend stress and to chip away at the attachment and clinging — the residual sense of self-identification — that cause it, until ultimately all traces of self-identification are gone and all that's left is limitless freedom"
(If you can, work your way through this.)
Cliche as it may be, there's a lot of truth in the saying "You are unique - just like everyone else."
If you could but know how many people quietly and secretly suffer the same insecurity.
Develop Compassion for others who are undoubtedly, experiencing the same train of fearful thought. They have been, and are, in precisely the same boat as you.
mindfulness-based CBT
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mindfulness-based_cognitive_therapy
metta bhavna practice
http://www.wildmind.org/metta
dealing with shame
http://newbuddhist.com/discussion/7447/dealing-with-shame
Hope those are helpful.
Inverted ego, that is interesting.
Thank you federico and lobster.
Definitely a different take. I was looking the fear and assertiveness lines.
The inverted or projected ego, 'people are ultra conscious of me' - when in fact we may be ultra sensitive/conscious. ...
Assertiveness is interesting because it is about giving oneself permission to be. Part of that being may impact on others comfort zone. What about our comfort zone?
Fear is interesting too, it is the root conflictive emotion of my anger. So @federica is right about how common innapropriate/damaging/self conflicted thoughts and emotions can be.
In Buddhism we gradually train the mind to be calmer in more challenging situations. For example on my imaginary/visualised trips to hell, I regularly stand in the middle of a hell realm and shout, 'OK DEMONS COME AND GET IT - OM MANI PEME HUM' and before I know it I am surrounded by hungry ghosts and others in a feeding frenzy.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ox-Head_and_Horse-Face
As I relax, they are given a feast of fear, anger, negativity, shame, worry, anxiety anything they love and I don't need.
This message sponsored by Lobster Picnics in Hell inc
I can't tell if you're being compassionate with the demons or not.
I can only hope some of their needs are seen through and they have demons of their own to pass the buck to.
Very interesting visualization technique!
I just may have to try it if you don't mind. Don't worry, I won't tell them you sent me.
This might prove of interest @David
https://jessicadavidson.co.uk/2016/04/18/embracing-darkness-how-to-feed-your-demons/
The more you think about the happiness of others, the happier you get.
Self consciousness comes from self consciousness.
Life has a great big joke and the punchline is: you are only happy when you care about the happiness of others.
Great article my crusty friend
Yep.
All happiness comes from wishing others to be happy.
All suffering comes from wishing ourselves to be happy.