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Grasping and rejecting
misecmisc1
I am a HinduIndia Veteran
What exactly is meant by grasping and rejecting, when in the teachings we see things written like - mind grasping at phenomena is mind in birth and death. mind not grasping at phenomena is mind in suchness.
Is it something like when I see a chair in my house, then I say that - It is a chair - is this grasping (as I call it as a chair and not as a table)? Or saying - It is my chair - is this grasping?
0
Comments
Seriously?
Yes. Also how can a lay person living a family life become free from grasping? And can a lay person live a family life after becoming free from grasping?
Nutshell answers....
Yes
Yes
.....And how this is done..... is up to YOU to find out
through experiential understanding...
It's quite clear that after all the time you have been a member (8 years) and after all the threads you have created, and all the questions you have asked, and all the responses you have received - you haven't really grasped anything.
Here - Read, mark and inwardly digest.
Then, go away and practice.
You have to find in your own experience what grasping is. You start with a vague idea and then presumably because your own mind has by nature clarity and sensitivity you can work on that rough idea what grasping is. So first step is to find it in your own experience. Nobody can do that for you.
Also presumably nobody on this forum has a perfect unshakeable understanding what grasping is but we have over time tried to improve from whatever vague initial idea we had to start out with.
Are you doing regular (consistent) meditation?
I can answer that.
No.
The basic practice is to start with something. Start small and follow through doing whatever you say you will do.
Then keep doing it. Whatever it is.
If you stop your practice then reassess and start over again.
Keep starting over again and again and keep reassessing.
It's similar to when you forget about the breath or whatever method in meditation. You just come back to it and start again.
Well, after my last job ended in Nov last year, after that I did a 10-day vipassna Goenka retreat and in the last 2 months, my sitting had been on and off, but not daily, sometimes in morning and sometimes in evening. For the last 1 week, I think I sat daily at least once or may be both afternoon and evening - mornings I have not been able to sit, because of my laziness of not getting up earlier in the morning.
Coming back to the first question in this thread -
In addition to the above question, is both calling as a chair and my chair are grasping?
So on the question with the chair. Are you asking if naming things and going by conventional names is an example of grasping? Like everything has a name: chair or table and so forth?
I don't think so because that is the nature of having 'language'. Language is actually very great. Imagine trying to teach any skill without language. How would a tribe teach hunting and tanning hides if they had no language? Wouldn't it be that much harder to teach dharma without describing and naming things?
I think where it could be grasping is if you don't understand that language labels things and is a useful tool to be more efficient in communicating.
Is this not so?
If you say "this is my chair". What are you feeling there? Are you angry that someone could take your chair from you? Or are you clarifying to someone that it is your chair that you are responsible for and has been your belonging you either purchased or were given.
Off the topic of this thread, I wish all of you a very happy Holi.
happy Holi. It falls on a full moon equinox this year. Is Holi always the same time of year (equinox 21st?). Or is it always the full moon of March? I hear people wear bright colors.
The equinox is determined by the Sun I think, and our relation to it. Not sure about Holi.
Also, I think @Jeffrey has the right understanding. It’s not the verbal act of naming something; it’s the mental act of making an assumption about it, or placing expectations on it.
How did the retreat go? Did you gain any experience that can help bring your practice into your daily life?
Well on an overall level for me, the retreat was interesting. It was mainly to do with sitting meditation, but I actually did not followed the instructions, rather I was trying to sit in zazen, but I got the overall idea of what is the technique of doing Goenka vipassana insight meditation, though I did not followed it during that retreat nor after that retreat. Currently I try to sit in zazen as per Dogen's Fukanzazengi's instructions.
CONTROL OVER APPEARANCES
Khenpo Tsultrim Gyamsto Rinpoche
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"Student: Why does it seem like everybody's somewhat under the control of appearances, instead of controlling the appearances?
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KTGR: Actually, having control over appearances does not mean jumping off buildings and flying. Rather, it means that you do not cling to appearances as they seem to be in the usual worldly way of relating to them. Such appearances will not cause you suffering or tie you up once you have gained mastery over them through not clinging.
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It is prajna realizing selflessness that frees you from samsara. Through knowing appearances to be inseparable from emptiness, you have mastery over them. It is not necessary to engage in behavior that is contrary to a mundane way of seeing things."
They are the two sides of the same coin....
In other words to perform one action eg grasping means that one is having to reject something else and if one is rejecting something, one is grasping something else...
You can't have one without the other...So by accepting neither, one is blending both options...well something like that..
If you don't objectify a chair ie. "chair is empty" then claiming that the so-called 'chair' to be yours makes no sense. You are referring to a non-existent thing. That also includes 'living beings'.
You cannot grasp emptiness - similar to grasping water or sand.
Both subject and object are empty.
By whom was this living being created?
Where is the living being's maker?
Where has the living being originated?
Where does the living being
cease?
What? Do you assume a 'living being,' Mara?
Do you take a position?
This is purely a pile of fabrications.
Here no living being
can be pinned down.
Just as when, with an assemblage of parts,
there's the word,
chariot,
even so when aggregates are present,
there's the convention of
living being.
For only stress is what comes to be;
stress, what remains & falls away.
Nothing but stress comes to be.
Nothing ceases but stress.
https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/sn/sn05/sn05.010.than.html