3 gates of right speech

paska

How do perform this when need a so called zen slap back into reality by bad people ie harsh speech as being blunt and mean. I realize I need to work on speech and behavior before I be a Buddhist chaplain

Jeroen

This part of the Abhaya Sutta always comes to my mind when thinking about right speech:

Now at that time a baby boy was lying face-up on the prince's lap. So the Blessed One said to the prince, "What do you think, prince: If this young boy, through your own negligence or that of the nurse, were to take a stick or a piece of gravel into its mouth, what would you do?"

"I would take it out, lord. If I couldn't get it out right away, then holding its head in my left hand and crooking a finger of my right, I would take it out, even if it meant drawing blood. Why is that? Because I have sympathy for the young boy."

"In the same way, prince:

[1] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be unfactual, untrue, unbeneficial (or: not connected with the goal), unendearing & disagreeable to others, he does not say them.

[2] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, unbeneficial, unendearing & disagreeable to others, he does not say them.

[3] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, beneficial, but unendearing & disagreeable to others, he has a sense of the proper time for saying them.

[4] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be unfactual, untrue, unbeneficial, but endearing & agreeable to others, he does not say them.

[5] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, unbeneficial, but endearing & agreeable to others, he does not say them.

[6] In the case of words that the Tathagata knows to be factual, true, beneficial, and endearing & agreeable to others, he has a sense of the proper time for saying them. Why is that? Because the Tathagata has sympathy for living beings."

Where are you from @paska, is English not your native language?

paska

So it’s a learnt subject for speech and behavior. Right time right notion. Oh boy being chaplain and being someone without tact could get me fired and sued wow. But if I am trained right shouldn’t be a problem

federica

@paska said:
So it’s a learnt subject for speech and behavior. Right time right notion. Oh boy being chaplain and being someone without tact could get me fired and sued wow. But if I am trained right shouldn’t be a problem

Thus have I heard:

"Even the swiftest horsemen, on the speediest chargers, in the Emperor's Private Army, are unable to retrieve the word, once spoken."
Where do words begin?
In the Mind.
As it is, the Zoroastrian Motto, is -

Think Good Thoughts
Say Good Words
Do Good Deeds

The most difficult of these, is the first.

So, speaking harshly is easy to avoid, if you succeed in eliminating all harsh thoughts first.
If you cannot eliminate harsh thoughts, it little matters whether you put them into words, or not.