I am sorry all I was in wacko mode after a incident I accidentally did and I could be in trouble with. It’s a traffic incident .karma sucks then you die.
I am a good person the lesson is even a very bad person deserves compassion that doesn’t mean we forget it means we move on because someone is remorseful and responsible. As in the Japanese buddhist story of a thief and a priest back then that meant a murder cutthroat villain thief . Then the thief is reborn as a monk why. Well that’s buddhism we move on and think everyone is worth it to enlightenment. I need to learn all it is is karma shared karma. That’s all. I may have been good in this life but the countless aeons of life before means countless and a lot of screwups few saint lives. That’s the teaching I need to realize to be ready for a practice and circle teacher if that comes. Right now I need to work on my meds situation yes I am stable but stable doesn’t mean not perfect. Yes I have a therapy team but karma is harsh and the way it’s setup on my new sect of Tibetan Buddhism is that at least for basic basic basic course as theirs another intermediate course called basic , anyways it got a forum for the teachings not therapy. I don’t have a actual teacher it’s self learning with a forum of teachers and elders.
I understand this forum is not about therapy but I do point out like Christian churches members help each other every way possible. Spiritual friendship. So I do apologize I won’t do it again. Cheers and wish me luck on healing and good practice and future good teacher
Ips I am well now it hurts seeing my online behavior even if I didn’t violate a damn thing secular and religious
Oh and I am getting a empowerment on sutra golden light via a recording endorsed by the leader himself lol. Healing is coming though being a beginner I don’t think this was meant for me. I will use it to heal me and the world