Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Examples: Monday, today, last week, Mar 26, 3/26/04
Welcome home! Please contact lincoln@icrontic.com if you have any difficulty logging in or using the site. New registrations must be manually approved which may take several days. Can't log in? Try clearing your browser's cookies.

When your practice hits a rough patch...

Ok, I admit, I've been having some trouble lately. My motivation is at an all time low right now. It first started when I had to move, and my entire schedule was utterly disrupted, and then I also had to have my 18 yr old dog put to sleep a little over two weeks ago. That second event really did me in in terms of practice, though I don't know why specifically. I think 'gee, now that I'm all moved in to my new place, I should get back to my regularly scheduled Buddhist programming,' only I feel very ... how to put this, empty about it (and I don't mean emptiness in the Buddhist sense of the word). I don't have any big disagreement with it's teachings, I have no desire to go back to a prior religious path, I'm just having a horrible time getting myself going again. The only things I reliably manage to do is to continue not eating meat and reading on here and Dharma Wheel.

I'm assuming most people hit rough spots along the way -- what things have you guys found helpful in getting focused again?

Comments

  • DaftChrisDaftChris Spiritually conflicted. Not of this world. Veteran
    Well, I've been debating whether or not Buddhism is the right path for me...and not even a month ago I stated on a thread that it absolutely was. Other spiritual practices are calling to me and I'm not sure if I wanted to mix them with Buddhism or just drop it altogether.

    What have I done to help myself? Introspection, meditation and deep thought. What was my conclusion? Buddhism is a practice, not an absolute. Why should I limit myself? I can still be a Buddhist and explore other paths.
    nenkohairiverflowlobster
  • fivebellsfivebells Veteran
    edited April 2013
    @black_tea, what were you getting out of the practice before the slump.

    Condolences for your dog.
  • VastmindVastmind Memphis, TN Veteran
    edited April 2013
    Sounds like a little case of complacent.

    Hold your self accountable by reminding yourself.
    Post-it notes help me.
    Hang a sign on the back of the door.
    Remind yourself....right in your face why this
    practice is good for you, when to practice, and
    what to practice.
    The sign will find you, then you'll catch yourself
    finding the sign, and before you know it, your
    routine will be in place.

    Sorry about doggie. :(
    That will throw anyone off their game.
    Mine (Shelbie), 16 years old, died in our arms
    at home couple of months ago.

    Sending Metta.
    black_tea
  • Invincible_summerInvincible_summer Heavy Metal Dhamma We(s)t coast, Canada Veteran
    I'm sorry to hear about your dog. Such loyal companions, dogs are. It's hard to part with them.

    About the mediation: for me, I've found that just continually trying to sit helps. Even if it ends up being 5 minutes of totally scattered thoughts or 15 mins of zoning out, eventually I get settled into the pattern of sitting and eventually it all starts coming back.

    But from I remember, you're a Pure Land Buddhist right? So I guess my tidbit about sitting doesn't really help! :p

    You never know though - from browsing Buddhist forums/websites you might stumble upon something that re-ignites your interest. Sometimes even just forcing yourself to do something you "don't feel like" doing will spark something that will catalyze a renewed motivation.

    SabreLucy_Begood
  • I'm sorry to hear about your dog. Such loyal companions, dogs are. It's hard to part with them.

    About the mediation: for me, I've found that just continually trying to sit helps. Even if it ends up being 5 minutes of totally scattered thoughts or 15 mins of zoning out, eventually I get settled into the pattern of sitting and eventually it all starts coming back.

    But from I remember, you're a Pure Land Buddhist right? So I guess my tidbit about sitting doesn't really help! :p

    You never know though - from browsing Buddhist forums/websites you might stumble upon something that re-ignites your interest. Sometimes even just forcing yourself to do something you "don't feel like" doing will spark something that will catalyze a renewed motivation.

    No, the tidbit about sitting, does help since I used to set aside a period for nembutsu every morning -- it is in itself meditative. I probably do need to just force myself to do more, but maybe for shorter bits of time just to get back into a routine.
    fivebells said:

    @black_tea, what were you getting out of the practice before the slump.

    Condolences for your dog.

    I felt more balanced over all, and it was encouraging me to pay more attention to my behavior and not take things for granted so much.

  • MaryAnneMaryAnne Veteran
    edited April 2013
    First let me say I'm so sorry to hear about your dog. Always a sad situation to say goodbye to a beloved pet... :(

    As for the spiritual rough patch... I didn't read the other responses you got so far... I'm in the middle of cooking but wanted to let my fingers fly while the thoughts came into my head- and I only have about 6 more minutes until the timer goes off!

    Anyhow, maybe it's one of those times when your subconscious is trying to tell you its time to change things up a bit. Nothing stays the same, everything is constantly shifting and evolving.... can't seem to make yourself find time for meditation?
    Well, then perhaps you should just set that aspect of practice aside for a while.... see how you feel about it in a few weeks time. Begin a new focus for your practice. Maybe you need to work on "patience".... or maybe "compassion" or "generosity". Maybe instead of regular sit-down-and-meditate time, you can just make it a point to be mindful and calm while doing yard work, or household chores or whatever needs to be done anyhow.

    Speaking from my own experiences, I set aside my meditation a few years back... it had become somewhat of a 'chore' to force myself to do it. I view that as counter -productive. I know others might strongly disagree with that; and believe wholeheartedly that one should always push through the reluctance and get down to it anyhow. And that might work for them, and it might work for you, too. But then again, maybe not. There are millions of Buddhists; kind, compassionate, loving, Dharma walking Buddhists who do not meditate, and don't belong to a sangha, nor study the suttras... they just LIVE Buddhism as best as they can. And it works just fine. :)

    so maybe there's no need to 'give up' Buddhism.... maybe it's just time for some tweaking?

    riverflowlobsterVastmindLucy_Begood
  • MaryAnne said:

    !Anyhow, maybe it's one of those times when your subconscious is trying to tell you its time to change things up a bit. Nothing stays the same, everything is constantly shifting and evolving.... can't seem to make yourself find time for meditation?
    Well, then perhaps you should just set that aspect of practice aside for a while.... see how you feel about it in a few weeks time. Begin a new focus for your practice. Maybe you need to work on "patience".... or maybe "compassion" or "generosity". Maybe instead of regular sit-down-and-meditate time, you can just make it a point to be mindful and calm while doing yard work, or household chores or whatever needs to be done anyhow.

    Speaking from my own experiences, I set aside my meditation a few years back... it had become somewhat of a 'chore' to force myself to do it. I view that as counter -productive. I know others might strongly disagree with that; and believe wholeheartedly that one should always push through the reluctance and get down to it anyhow. And that might work for them, and it might work for you, too. But then again, maybe not. There are millions of Buddhists; kind, compassionate, loving, Dharma walking Buddhists who do not meditate, and don't belong to a sangha, nor study the suttras... they just LIVE Buddhism as best as they can. And it works just fine. :)

    so maybe there's no need to 'give up' Buddhism.... maybe it's just time for some tweaking?

    I really appreciate your post. When I got home from work, I started wondering whether trying to force myself to meditate and chant more formally isn't the answer. I definitely don't want to give up Buddhism, but I may need to go about it a different way -- at least for right now.

    It's nice to have someone suggest the same thing. I know that there are lots of Buddhists who do not focus on meditation, yet it's easy for me to get caught up in the idea that one must meditate in some fashion, since that's the predominate view of Buddhism in the US. There's a Shin book I've thought about downloading for awhile ("Bits of Rubble Turned into Gold"). I think I'm going to go ahead and buy it--maybe it's time to revisit Shin again.
  • Hmm, does Pure Land Buddhism have anything like death and impermanence meditation? That's probably what I would usually recommend.
  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran
    one must meditate
    :wow:

    ah the teachings of the dharma police . . .
    Mourn your dog (it's allowed), read the gold in the rubble book and be kind to the 'Meditation über alles' SS (Sangha Society).

    As I sat in meditation this morning, the thought arose, 'when are you going to start practicing Buddhism?'

    I think I may restart this course, which teaches:
    'How not to meditate', which may be just what I need . . .
    http://aromeditation.org/

    Keep up the good work and let us know what you think of the Shin book.
    I always thought shin was something below the knee . . . pay no mind to me . . .

    :screwy:
    Tosh
  • SabreSabre Veteran
    edited April 2013
    Sometimes it's best to find out why we don't want to practice. You don't have to think it through, but just feel the feeling of don't wanting to practice, and usually you can see deeply enough into it to see where it comes from. You can learn a lot from this.

    If it doesn't happen this way, I find that when I don't feel like practicing, I also don't feel like not practicing, if you get what I mean. So practicing and not practicing are similar to me. I'm a bit indifferent. I can imagine you having this feeling now. Then, I simply practice out of indifference. Not the best motivator, but hey.. Better than not practicing. But I find I have this when things go well, not when things are hard. When things are hard for me, I know doing the practice will make it easier.

    That having said, yes, I had some times with very little motivation. Motivation has been one of my key problems, but I picked up the practice anyway. I'm sure you'll also pick it back up. At least, once you've seen some fruits of the practice, there is hardly any turning back. For me at least. I know I'll pick it back up someday, so may just as well be today.

    Wish you all the best.

    Sabre
    riverflowlobster
  • lobster said:


    Keep up the good work and let us know what you think of the Shin book.
    I always thought shin was something below the knee . . . pay no mind to me . . .

    :screwy:

    LOL, it took me a really long time to get that -- talk about slow on the uptake ;)

    @Tosh they really do make apps for everything now :)

    Thanks for all the suggestions everybody as well as the condolences on losing Bridie -- I really do appreciate it. I think I needed to get what was going on off my chest. I feel like when I talk about things with other people (such as on this lovely message board) it keeps me a bit more honest, and it's harder to just walk away from something that I know is a good thing.

    I did set up my altar last night on the dresser at the bottom of my steps. Now everytime I go up and down stairs I see it, pause and bow -- not so out of sight out of mind. I will download that book when I get home (almost done with Middlemarch anyway), and work on getting myself back in a better frame of mind.
    paigeToshlobster
  • karastikarasti Breathing Minnesota Moderator
    I was going to say, set up a practice area in your home, make it conducive to your practice and your study and you might be more inspired but it looks like you already did that! It'll help. Sometimes all you can do is what you can. I got thrown off track when I hurt my knee because I always sit in the same spot crosslegged and could no longer sit crosslegged, nor even sit on the floor. I was too wrapped up in what was happening to me and feeling sorry for myself to practice, which was a mistake because it probably would have been the most benefit at that time. I started reading again, and that helped get me back in the mood. I started meditating again for shorter periods. A short retreat always helps get me back on track, too, if you have anything available in your area.
    lobster
Sign In or Register to comment.