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JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
It seems to me that opinions are not of any great worth, that next to every ‘no’ there is a ‘yes’ that is equally true, which means, that not only are they without much worth, but also they are not free of danger.
— Hein Thijssen, Our Original State: Return to Natural Religion
The waters are still in the pool of our mind;
the Buddha and the moon are reflected there.
But the winds of karma stir up ripples;
Sentient beings and the Buddha become distant.
Everything comes and goes.
Pleasure moves on too early,
And trouble leaves too slow.
Just when you're thinking
You've finally got it made,
Bad news comes knocking
At your garden gate.
I wonder if fewer people would eat Rabbit Stew if instead it was called Bunny Rabbit Stew.
Bodhi Neil deGrasse Tyson
Challenge accepted! Oops think I went wrong again ...
3
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
The heart of the path is quite easy. There’s no need to explain anything at length. Let go of love and hate and let things be. That is all I do in my practice.
— Ajahn Chah
4
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
Anything which is troubling you, anything which is irritating you, that is your teacher.
"We do not have to die to enter the Kingdom of Heaven. In fact we have to be fully alive. When we breathe in and out and hug a beautiful tree, we are in Heaven. When we take one conscious breath, aware of our eyes, our heart, our liver, and our non-toothache, we are transported to Paradise right away. Peace is available. We only have to touch it. When we are truly alive, we can see that the tree is part of Heaven, and we are also part of Heaven. The whole universe is conspiring to reveal this to us, but we are so out of touch that we invest our resources in cutting down the trees. If we want to enter Heaven on Earth, we need only one conscious step and one conscious breath. When we touch peace, everything becomes real. We become ourselves, fully alive in the present moment, and the tree, our child, and everything else reveal themselves to us in their full splendor."
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
There is no way to happiness — happiness is the way.
— Thich Nhat Hanh
3
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
“When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change”
Always recognize the dreamlike qualities of life and reduce attachment and aversion. Practice good-heartedness towards all beings. Be loving and compassionate, no matter what others do to you. What they do will not matter so much when you see it as a dream. The trick is to have a positive intention during the dream. This is the essential point.
~ Chagdud Tulku Rinpoche
3
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
Unenlightenment is a game: lila.
It is a game to be enjoyed, but remember:
Death, suffering and pain are the taxes of sense enjoyments.
"Defilements were invented by the Ego to keep itself employed"
~A Meditative Thought~
1
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
First, you need to know the meaning of illusion. What is projected onto the screen is illusion. You don’t have any awareness of the projection when you are engrossed in the physical pictures of the movie theater. In these pictures some are happy and some are sad. You are so into these people on this screen that you become one with those who suffer and those who enjoy. This is the story of samsara.
When the projection is over and another show is to be shown you will see for a moment what the pictures have been played on. The screen is not tainted at all. She is not wet from the ocean and she is not burned from the fire. All of these projections are not real.
If you know you are the screen and that all the projections are illusions then only can you enjoy them. You will know that you cannot be tainted. Simply stay quiet and you will know that you have never been tainted because you have never been born. The one who is born and dies is only a concept. Knowing this you will become very happy.
— H. W. L. Poonja
5
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
The truth is within, but you always look somewhere else in order to appease your tendency to go out after sense objects. But all of this is illusion. Find where the illusion arises from. Find where this thought arises from. Then you will have found the love which always dwells within you. Then you will see the illusion of everything, including your own body.
What appears and disappears is not real.
Once you know it is illusion you will separate yourself from it and you are “the one who has gone beyond the illusion”, like a mirage of a river in the desert. The ones who try to be fulfilled by this mirage will never be satisfied. They will just get into more and more trouble.
Some people will know that this river is a mirage and they don’t go there, they know maya appears, but does not exist. When you know this you must ask where peace and happiness is. This search will bring you to Satsang.
— H. W. L. Poonja
1
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
The entire waking state is a concept just as the dream state is. When you know this you will say, “now I am looking at this in a very new atmosphere”, and you will know who is always awake, who does not sleep.
— H. W. L. Poonja
1
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
Thought is in the last moment, not in this moment. In the present there is no room for thought.
“Instead of becoming the worlds greatest expert on Buddhism..let go ..let go ...let go.”
Ajahn Sumedho.
3
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
Arrogance is not recognising this timeless moment.
Arrogance is “I am the body”.
Remove arrogance and enlightenment is instantaneous.
“I am so and so” is the first arrogance.
And “this is mine” is the second. Look at it!
— H. W. L. Poonja
3
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
On three accounts searching and practice
are foolishness and misleading
and are only the clever mind postponing freedom.
The first is that it creates a searcher.
This reinforces the concept of an individual sufferer
That is separate from Freedom, and
That Self is something other than Here and Now.
— H. W. L. Poonja
1
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
The second is the search.
Searching is a distraction which causes postponement
and endless needless suffering.
Searching promotes religions, traditions,
And paths to be adhered to,
Which only entrap you deeper in illusion.
The Truth is only here and now,
While the search says it is tomorrow.
— H. W. L. Poonja
1
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
The third is that the search creates an object to be found,
And this can be the subtlest and most misleading trap.
As you start a search you conceptualise
What it is you are searching for.
Since it is the nature of Maya, illusion,
To become whatever is your desire;
Whatever you think you will attain it.
So because of your search you will create
And then attain whatever it is you are searching for.
— H. W. L. Poonja
0
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
A man who is born must die, that is his nature. So don’t keep him in your heart, everybody must die. You are not a graveyard where the dead are kept!
— H. W. L. Poonja
0
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
You are lucky to be sitting quiet because so many other paths turn into traps of doing which you cannot get out of. Truly being quiet will give you much more benefit than chanting the name of god.
— H. W. L. Poonja
2
Fosdickin its eye are mirrored far off mountainsAlaska, USAVeteran
The nature of the sky is originally clear
But by gazing and gazing, the sight becomes obscured.
Consciousness is afraid of Emptiness
(It sounds quite Dharma ish when one thinks of the fear the self has of non existence )
~Paul Valery...French Poet & Philosopher~
2
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
Detachment is your own nature
so the wise are not attracted to the transient.
Only the foolish cling to that which brings unhappiness,
and are thus butchered by time.
— H. W. L. Poonja
0
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
Hidden tendencies arise to leave when you are Quiet,
so it is a good thing when vasanas rise.
Do not be dismayed because they are Self.
Let vasanas arise, they do not exist.
The world is a playground for the wise,
and a graveyard for the foolish.
Let the vasanas play, they are transient imaginations,
and even the “I” to which they occur is imagination itself.
— H. W. L. Poonja
0
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
So whatever you think you will get,
Think you are fine and you are fine,
Think you are in hell and you are in hell.
Think “I am suffering” and you are suffering.
Replace the thought “I am suffering”
with the thought “I am free, I am freedom,
I am consciousness, I am not the body”.
Do not kiss your ego by saying “I am suffering”,
Rather kiss yourself by saying “I am free.”
oops don't seem to have a self to kiss ...
ah well ...
0
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
Your whole life has been a string of repeated affirmations, “I am bound”, “I am suffering”, “I will die”. These are the notions you have entertained. Simply get rid of them! Freedom is waiting within, ready to hug you, but you have turned your back. If anything is death it is turning your back on your self by taking your notions, ideas and intentions of bondage and suffering.
— H. W. L. Poonja
0
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
When a man is free from sorrow, personality and identification, compassion arises in his mind for those who suffer.
— H. W. L. Poonja
0
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
Reading books before you know the Truth will destroy you because books pollute you with so many notions which will just distract you from your self. Words are indicators only so follow the indications and forget about the words.
Thoughts come and go like a thief in an empty house.
There is nothing to be gained or lost.
~ Padampa Sangye
5
DavidA human residing in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. Ancestral territory of the Erie, Haudenosaunee, Huron-Wendat, Mississauga and Neutral First NationsVeteran
"It is true that the Buddha taught the truth of suffering but he also taught the truth of "dwelling happily in things as they are" (drishta dharma sukha viharin)
Samyutta Nikaya V,326 and other places"
Thich Nhat Hanh The Heart of the Buddhas Teachings page 23.
6
DavidA human residing in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. Ancestral territory of the Erie, Haudenosaunee, Huron-Wendat, Mississauga and Neutral First NationsVeteran
@lobster said: Psychologists talk about people who are co-dependent because they don't have a sense of self. What psychologists mean when they say a person has no sense of self is very different from what the Buddha meant by no-self or selflessness. People with psychological problems actually have a very strong sense of self in the Buddhist sense, although they may not in the psychological sense of the word. Psychologically, they don't see themselves as efficacious individuals in the world, but they still have a very strong sense of "I": "I am worthless." When somebody criticizes them, they don't like it. They get into co-dependent relationships to protect or to please this "I." When they fall into self-pity, their sense of an inherently existent "I" is very strong. Thus they still have self-grasping even though they lack a psychologically healthy sense of self.
Buddhism recognizes two kinds of sense of self. There's one sense of self that is healthy and necessary to be efficacious on the path. The object of this sense of self is the conventionally existent "I." The other sense of self grasps at an inherently existent self that never has and never will exist. Within Buddhism, when we talk about realizing emptiness, we're negating the false self, this self that appears inherently existent to us. Thubten Chodron from Cultivating a Compassionate Heart: The Yoga Method of Chenrezig
Not to derail but wow, that was me in my late teens and even early twenties after I found Buddhism (to a progressively lesser degree). I remember the first time I became mindful of it. I had just started a meditation practice and was at work one day and I said something nagative about myself (probably in the hopes of receiving assurance to the contrary) and a co-worker said to me "You're so vain". I was shocked and meditated on it later. I asked myself "How could I be vain if I do not like myself?" I came to see that I was reinforcing a strong sense of self in an unhealthy way and looking for validation from external forces.
It changed everything and if I had read the above quote back then, I think the switch would have been flipped too.
The dharma is powerful when explained properly and in action with deep looking.
Listening is everything. Quotes are not trite wisdom ... when they are heard. We are not trying to provide 'sage nodding' but digestion of personal insight.
The Force is With Us
1
JeroenLuminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlandsVeteran
In every generation there are but a few who truly desire freedom.
— anonymous
1
federicaSeeker of the clear blue sky...Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubtModerator
@Kerome said:
Reading books before you know the Truth will destroy you because books pollute you with so many notions which will just distract you from your self. Words are indicators only so follow the indications and forget about the words.
— H. W. L. Poonja
And yet here you are, giving us stuff to read.... 🤭
1
federicaSeeker of the clear blue sky...Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubtModerator
@David said:... I said something negative about myself (probably in the hopes of receiving assurance to the contrary) and a co-worker said to me "You're so vain". I was shocked and meditated on it later. I asked myself, "How could I be vain if I do not like myself?" I came to see that I was reinforcing a strong sense of self in an unhealthy way and looking for validation from external forces.
It's called 'reverse egotism'.
It's good that you realised what you were doing...
Emotional Vampires/Leeches do this all the time. It elicits attention, and reassurance, and what they're actually doing, is precisely what you describe: Seeking reassurance to the contrary (they want to be talked about, principally, above anything else) and wanting validation form those outside themselves. What they actually want is confirmation of how wonderful they actually are.
Please know: I am in no way suggesting you were this, or that you even behaved that way.
You recognised pretty quickly what was at play here...
In fact, if you were to reveal to an Emotional Vampire/Leech, that this is what they're doing, they would recoil in horror, and deny everything, probably with a load of resentment and vehemence thrown in for good measure.
But that IS what it is.
It's a form of Egotism.
It's also a reason why dysfunctional children behave the way they do. They receive punishment and chastisement; but any form of attention, in their negative Mind-set, is at least some attention... Bad attention is better than none.
@Kerome said:
Reading books before you know the Truth will destroy you because books pollute you with so many notions which will just distract you from your self. Words are indicators only so follow the indications and forget about the words.
— H. W. L. Poonja
And yet here you are, giving us stuff to read.... 🤭
Yeah haha, I am always slightly amused when I read posts on Facebook about how damaging iphones and social media are!
Moment by moment consciousness makes up the event which becomes normal conscious experience....An abstraction
~Every Now & Zen~
0
DavidA human residing in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. Ancestral territory of the Erie, Haudenosaunee, Huron-Wendat, Mississauga and Neutral First NationsVeteran
The notion of death, of nothingness, is very dangerous. It makes people suffer a lot. In Buddhist teaching, nothingness is just a concept, and it is never applicable to reality.
@David said:... I said something negative about myself (probably in the hopes of receiving assurance to the contrary) and a co-worker said to me "You're so vain". I was shocked and meditated on it later. I asked myself, "How could I be vain if I do not like myself?" I came to see that I was reinforcing a strong sense of self in an unhealthy way and looking for validation from external forces.
It's called 'reverse egotism'.
It's good that you realised what you were doing...
Emotional Vampires/Leeches do this all the time. It elicits attention, and reassurance, and what they're actually doing, is precisely what you describe: Seeking reassurance to the contrary (they want to be talked about, principally, above anything else) and wanting validation form those outside themselves. What they actually want is confirmation of how wonderful they actually are.
Please know: I am in no way suggesting you were this, or that you even behaved that way.
You recognised pretty quickly what was at play here...
In fact, if you were to reveal to an Emotional Vampire/Leech, that this is what they're doing, they would recoil in horror, and deny everything, probably with a load of resentment and vehemence thrown in for good measure.
But that IS what it is.
It's a form of Egotism.
It's also a reason why dysfunctional children behave the way they do. They receive punishment and chastisement; but any form of attention, in their negative Mind-set, is at least some attention... Bad attention is better than none.
It certainly felt like that is what I was doing but I was the one my friends always came to for advice and I had way too many friends. I had a birthmark taken off my face when I was little and the scar is still quite noticeable so I got the nickname "scarface" in like grade 1, lol. That gave me a complex that I didn't understand until my coworker said what she said. That I was attracted to her probably made it hit home harder.
Comments
It seems to me that opinions are not of any great worth, that next to every ‘no’ there is a ‘yes’ that is equally true, which means, that not only are they without much worth, but also they are not free of danger.
— Hein Thijssen, Our Original State: Return to Natural Religion
The waters are still in the pool of our mind;
the Buddha and the moon are reflected there.
But the winds of karma stir up ripples;
Sentient beings and the Buddha become distant.
Vinaya Master Tansheng
Stress is caused by being here but wanting to be there
Eckhart Tolle
Be a hollow bamboo, and God will come and play on you.
— Osho
Regard this phantom world
As a star at dawn, a bubble in a stream,
A flash of lightning in a summer cloud
A flickering lamp - a phantom - and a dream.
Shakyamuni Buddha
Everything comes and goes.
Pleasure moves on too early,
And trouble leaves too slow.
Just when you're thinking
You've finally got it made,
Bad news comes knocking
At your garden gate.
—Joni Mitchell, Down to You
I wonder if fewer people would eat Rabbit Stew if instead it was called Bunny Rabbit Stew.
Bodhi Neil deGrasse Tyson
Challenge accepted! Oops think I went wrong again ...
The heart of the path is quite easy. There’s no need to explain anything at length. Let go of love and hate and let things be. That is all I do in my practice.
— Ajahn Chah
Anything which is troubling you, anything which is irritating you, that is your teacher.
— Ajahn Chah
With mindfulness as one's tool
one won't become mind fool
~Just a thought~
"We do not have to die to enter the Kingdom of Heaven. In fact we have to be fully alive. When we breathe in and out and hug a beautiful tree, we are in Heaven. When we take one conscious breath, aware of our eyes, our heart, our liver, and our non-toothache, we are transported to Paradise right away. Peace is available. We only have to touch it. When we are truly alive, we can see that the tree is part of Heaven, and we are also part of Heaven. The whole universe is conspiring to reveal this to us, but we are so out of touch that we invest our resources in cutting down the trees. If we want to enter Heaven on Earth, we need only one conscious step and one conscious breath. When we touch peace, everything becomes real. We become ourselves, fully alive in the present moment, and the tree, our child, and everything else reveal themselves to us in their full splendor."
Thich Nhat Hanh.
“The miracle is to walk on Earth.”
Linji Yixuan.
https://www.lionsroar.com/beyond-birth-and-death/
Something for the weekend sir?
Bodhi barber
https://wisdomquotes.com/buddha-quotes/
There is no way to happiness — happiness is the way.
— Thich Nhat Hanh
“When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change”
— Thich Nhat Hanh
I grew lettuce this year and it was too early. It was limp lettuce. Should have tried to be hardier. Bad useless lettuce ... all dead ...
"Wherever you go, there you are."
Also a well-known song...
All the Buddhist monks I have seen have been dry because Buddhism doesn’t teach love very well. You need love.
— H. W. L. Poonja
Always recognize the dreamlike qualities of life and reduce attachment and aversion. Practice good-heartedness towards all beings. Be loving and compassionate, no matter what others do to you. What they do will not matter so much when you see it as a dream. The trick is to have a positive intention during the dream. This is the essential point.
~ Chagdud Tulku Rinpoche
Unenlightenment is a game: lila.
It is a game to be enjoyed, but remember:
Death, suffering and pain are the taxes of sense enjoyments.
— H. W. L. Poonja
"Defilements were invented by the Ego to keep itself employed"
~A Meditative Thought~
First, you need to know the meaning of illusion. What is projected onto the screen is illusion. You don’t have any awareness of the projection when you are engrossed in the physical pictures of the movie theater. In these pictures some are happy and some are sad. You are so into these people on this screen that you become one with those who suffer and those who enjoy. This is the story of samsara.
When the projection is over and another show is to be shown you will see for a moment what the pictures have been played on. The screen is not tainted at all. She is not wet from the ocean and she is not burned from the fire. All of these projections are not real.
If you know you are the screen and that all the projections are illusions then only can you enjoy them. You will know that you cannot be tainted. Simply stay quiet and you will know that you have never been tainted because you have never been born. The one who is born and dies is only a concept. Knowing this you will become very happy.
— H. W. L. Poonja
The truth is within, but you always look somewhere else in order to appease your tendency to go out after sense objects. But all of this is illusion. Find where the illusion arises from. Find where this thought arises from. Then you will have found the love which always dwells within you. Then you will see the illusion of everything, including your own body.
What appears and disappears is not real.
Once you know it is illusion you will separate yourself from it and you are “the one who has gone beyond the illusion”, like a mirage of a river in the desert. The ones who try to be fulfilled by this mirage will never be satisfied. They will just get into more and more trouble.
Some people will know that this river is a mirage and they don’t go there, they know maya appears, but does not exist. When you know this you must ask where peace and happiness is. This search will bring you to Satsang.
— H. W. L. Poonja
The entire waking state is a concept just as the dream state is. When you know this you will say, “now I am looking at this in a very new atmosphere”, and you will know who is always awake, who does not sleep.
— H. W. L. Poonja
Thought is in the last moment, not in this moment. In the present there is no room for thought.
— H. W. L. Poonja
“Instead of becoming the worlds greatest expert on Buddhism..let go ..let go ...let go.”
Ajahn Sumedho.
Arrogance is not recognising this timeless moment.
Arrogance is “I am the body”.
Remove arrogance and enlightenment is instantaneous.
“I am so and so” is the first arrogance.
And “this is mine” is the second. Look at it!
— H. W. L. Poonja
On three accounts searching and practice
are foolishness and misleading
and are only the clever mind postponing freedom.
The first is that it creates a searcher.
This reinforces the concept of an individual sufferer
That is separate from Freedom, and
That Self is something other than Here and Now.
— H. W. L. Poonja
The second is the search.
Searching is a distraction which causes postponement
and endless needless suffering.
Searching promotes religions, traditions,
And paths to be adhered to,
Which only entrap you deeper in illusion.
The Truth is only here and now,
While the search says it is tomorrow.
— H. W. L. Poonja
The third is that the search creates an object to be found,
And this can be the subtlest and most misleading trap.
As you start a search you conceptualise
What it is you are searching for.
Since it is the nature of Maya, illusion,
To become whatever is your desire;
Whatever you think you will attain it.
So because of your search you will create
And then attain whatever it is you are searching for.
— H. W. L. Poonja
A man who is born must die, that is his nature. So don’t keep him in your heart, everybody must die. You are not a graveyard where the dead are kept!
— H. W. L. Poonja
You are lucky to be sitting quiet because so many other paths turn into traps of doing which you cannot get out of. Truly being quiet will give you much more benefit than chanting the name of god.
— H. W. L. Poonja
The nature of the sky is originally clear
But by gazing and gazing, the sight becomes obscured.
Consciousness is afraid of Emptiness
(It sounds quite Dharma ish when one thinks of the fear the self has of non existence )
~Paul Valery...French Poet & Philosopher~
Detachment is your own nature
so the wise are not attracted to the transient.
Only the foolish cling to that which brings unhappiness,
and are thus butchered by time.
— H. W. L. Poonja
Hidden tendencies arise to leave when you are Quiet,
so it is a good thing when vasanas rise.
Do not be dismayed because they are Self.
Let vasanas arise, they do not exist.
The world is a playground for the wise,
and a graveyard for the foolish.
Let the vasanas play, they are transient imaginations,
and even the “I” to which they occur is imagination itself.
— H. W. L. Poonja
So whatever you think you will get,
Think you are fine and you are fine,
Think you are in hell and you are in hell.
Think “I am suffering” and you are suffering.
Replace the thought “I am suffering”
with the thought “I am free, I am freedom,
I am consciousness, I am not the body”.
Do not kiss your ego by saying “I am suffering”,
Rather kiss yourself by saying “I am free.”
— H. W. L. Poonja
oops don't seem to have a self to kiss ...
ah well ...
Your whole life has been a string of repeated affirmations, “I am bound”, “I am suffering”, “I will die”. These are the notions you have entertained. Simply get rid of them! Freedom is waiting within, ready to hug you, but you have turned your back. If anything is death it is turning your back on your self by taking your notions, ideas and intentions of bondage and suffering.
— H. W. L. Poonja
When a man is free from sorrow, personality and identification, compassion arises in his mind for those who suffer.
— H. W. L. Poonja
Reading books before you know the Truth will destroy you because books pollute you with so many notions which will just distract you from your self. Words are indicators only so follow the indications and forget about the words.
— H. W. L. Poonja
Thoughts come and go like a thief in an empty house.
There is nothing to be gained or lost.
~ Padampa Sangye
"It is true that the Buddha taught the truth of suffering but he also taught the truth of "dwelling happily in things as they are" (drishta dharma sukha viharin)
Not to derail but wow, that was me in my late teens and even early twenties after I found Buddhism (to a progressively lesser degree). I remember the first time I became mindful of it. I had just started a meditation practice and was at work one day and I said something nagative about myself (probably in the hopes of receiving assurance to the contrary) and a co-worker said to me "You're so vain". I was shocked and meditated on it later. I asked myself "How could I be vain if I do not like myself?" I came to see that I was reinforcing a strong sense of self in an unhealthy way and looking for validation from external forces.
It changed everything and if I had read the above quote back then, I think the switch would have been flipped too.
The dharma is powerful when explained properly and in action with deep looking.
Thanks @Bunks and @Lobster and all.
Thanks @David
Listening is everything. Quotes are not trite wisdom ... when they are heard. We are not trying to provide 'sage nodding' but digestion of personal insight.
The Force is With Us
In every generation there are but a few who truly desire freedom.
— anonymous
And yet here you are, giving us stuff to read.... 🤭
It's called 'reverse egotism'.
It's good that you realised what you were doing...
Emotional Vampires/Leeches do this all the time. It elicits attention, and reassurance, and what they're actually doing, is precisely what you describe: Seeking reassurance to the contrary (they want to be talked about, principally, above anything else) and wanting validation form those outside themselves. What they actually want is confirmation of how wonderful they actually are.
Please know: I am in no way suggesting you were this, or that you even behaved that way.
You recognised pretty quickly what was at play here...
In fact, if you were to reveal to an Emotional Vampire/Leech, that this is what they're doing, they would recoil in horror, and deny everything, probably with a load of resentment and vehemence thrown in for good measure.
But that IS what it is.
It's a form of Egotism.
It's also a reason why dysfunctional children behave the way they do. They receive punishment and chastisement; but any form of attention, in their negative Mind-set, is at least some attention... Bad attention is better than none.
Yeah haha, I am always slightly amused when I read posts on Facebook about how damaging iphones and social media are!
Ah derrrrrrrr.....
Moment by moment consciousness makes up the event which becomes normal conscious experience....An abstraction
~Every Now & Zen~
The notion of death, of nothingness, is very dangerous. It makes people suffer a lot. In Buddhist teaching, nothingness is just a concept, and it is never applicable to reality.
Thich Nhat Hanh.
It certainly felt like that is what I was doing but I was the one my friends always came to for advice and I had way too many friends. I had a birthmark taken off my face when I was little and the scar is still quite noticeable so I got the nickname "scarface" in like grade 1, lol. That gave me a complex that I didn't understand until my coworker said what she said. That I was attracted to her probably made it hit home harder.