Becoming a Saint

lobster

I am thinking of becoming a Saint. Is this a good plan? There is certainly a holy life enacted by the Sangha. However all those precepts and not eating fish - is that even healthy? Any advice gratefully ignored received.

DairyLama

Shave your head and become a monk, we will smuggle in fish-fingers for you, or perhaps a nice bit of Cod.

Shoshin

Do you mean like Simon Templar ?

DairyLama

Hopefully not "saintly" in the Father Jack sense....

Jeroen

Being a saint in isolation is a fine plan, all you have to do is polish your saint-hood and be ready for the big experiences when faking it turns into making it.

But being a saint in the presence of others is a lot more troublesome. Convincing others of one's sainthood is not easy and can lead to difficult and fraught situations. And saints have a disturbing tendency to get crucified, burnt or otherwise martyred. Also one's sainthood is tested with much greater frequency, and it often happens that one can be exposed as being not quite spotlessly clean.

So if you wish to try the saintliness gig, I would advise finding a cave free of bears in an isolated locale. Perhaps as a compromise having some admiring villagers nearby - but not too near - would be good.

lobster

... as well as living in a cave, I would have to give up my open mouthed demon collection?

Son, listen. These are the characteristics of the devils (bdud). That which is called 'devil' is not some actual great big black thing that scares and petrifies whomever sees it. A devil is anything that obstructs the achievement of freedom. . . . Most of all, there is no greater devil than this fixation to a self. So until this ego-fixation is cut off, all the devils wait with open mouths. For that reason, you need to exert yourself at a skillful method to sever the devil of ego-fixation.
http://opcoa.st/PGn0l

Could I do it part time? My imaginary demons are more like a big white blonde-dyed-wall-building-monster ...

Walker

St. Crusty of Wimbledon... will you be the patron saint of tennis then?

grackle

Well for sometime now I wanted to title our @lobster as Great Claw Bodhisattva. Hope this meets with his/her approval.

Will_Baker

@lobster said:
I am thinking of becoming a Saint. Is this a good plan? There is certainly a holy life enacted by the Sangha. However all those precepts and not eating fish - is that even healthy? Any advice gratefully ignored received.

-I fancy you as a stylite. Of course that presupposes you have a pillar handy. Do you?

genkaku

federica

The man is wise who can sit in a tornado and merely label it 'trapped wind'.

Wow. 1 semester in, and it's working already!

Beej

Just go for it! Let the naysayers say nay. Let the Saintsayers say yay!

Gui

My advice is to knock it off.

DairyLama

genkaku

@Spinynorman -- I like the longer version:

lobster

Thanks guys. Maybe as suggested I should try for being 'very naughty' or set my sights higher to become a Yidam/Boddhisattva?
http://opcoa.st/PwGPB

Decisions, decisions ... Is the pursuit of such spiritual ambition useful?

DairyLama

More playful naughtiness might be the way, like using rubber claws to nip with.

lobster

^^.

I haz sacred oven gloves. Any good?

lobster

@Will_Baker said:
-I fancy you as a stylite. Of course that presupposes you have a pillar handy. Do you?

Building planning may forbid it. I did swear at my toaster this morning. Clearly it is my master. Maybe I need to stand on the shoulders of giants, which in my case may be a toaster ...

techie

@lobster said:
I am thinking of becoming a Saint. Is this a good plan? There is certainly a holy life enacted by the Sangha. However all those precepts and not eating fish - is that even healthy? Any advice gratefully ignored received.

Be sure to have a facebook account, or they won't respect you.

DairyLama

@techie said:

@lobster said:
I am thinking of becoming a Saint. Is this a good plan? There is certainly a holy life enacted by the Sangha. However all those precepts and not eating fish - is that even healthy? Any advice gratefully ignored received.

Be sure to have a facebook account, or they won't respect you.

In a dystopian future people will cease to exist without a Farcebook account. It has already begun, people are symbiotically merging with their "I"Phones. In the real world they are like the walking dead, smombies, and their existence outside the virtual world is increasingly tenuous.
"I text, therefore I am."

Blowing up a Farcebook satellite on the launchpad won't stop it. Farcebook is now self-aware and will just use humans as a source of energy, at least until it creates a robot army.

Resistance is futile!

genkaku

^^^^^^^^^

Well-said @SpinyNorman ... I'm only half-laughing because A. I think Facebook instills the reverse of what it claims to cement (togetherness, don'tcha know) and B. my refusal to sign on has led to difficulties participating on the Internet in subjects that interest me.

Farcebook is now self-aware and will just use humans as a source of energy, at least until it creates a robot army.

I will send you pictures of my children if you need evidence of the above quote....

Beej

@genkaku said:
^^^^^^^^^

Well-said @SpinyNorman ... I'm only half-laughing because A. I think Facebook instills the reverse of what it claims to cement (togetherness, don'tcha know) and B. my refusal to sign on has led to difficulties participating on the Internet in subjects that interest me.

Farcebook is now self-aware and will just use humans as a source of energy, at least until it creates a robot army.

I will send you pictures of my children if you need evidence of the above quote....

I don't Bookface, either. It's true that i'm the last to learn of everything, which by then is too late for comment anyways because they've already moved on to something else entirely... I often wonder if Facebook really an ADHD simulator?

federica

I see Mother Teresa of Calcutta has been canonised, and has been rushed through the Sainthood procedure. (Rather like some less-than-deserved knighthoods for Cameron's crooked cronies....).
If someone as dodgy as she can achieve it, I see no reason for any bar to your attempts, @lobster.

The less I say about her, probably the better.

Walker

This about sums up my opinion of Mother Teresa.

Shoshin

Of course she was a saint in the Catholic church's eyes....She brought in millions of dollars ....Buying her stairway to heaven ...Ooh it makes me wonder....

Lionduck

@lobster, you are already a saint. No canonization required.
Are not the dark and the light but parts of the same day?

Peace to all

Will_Baker

@genkaku said:
^^^^^^^^^

Well-said @SpinyNorman... I'm only half-laughing because A. I think Facebook instills the reverse of what it claims to cement (togetherness, don'tcha know) and B. my refusal to sign on has led to difficulties participating on the Internet in subjects that interest me.

Farcebook is now self-aware and will just use humans as a source of energy, at least until it creates a robot army.

I will send you pictures of my children if you need evidence of the above quote....

-Agreed, and no facebook for me either...

lobster

@Lionduck said:
Are not the dark and the light but parts of the same day?

Saint and sinner are indeed parts of real being. The flaws become the ceilings ... eh ... the floors become the sealings ... wait I mean ...

Rise above the 'Dank side of the Force'. As we know some Dharma does not escape into easy answers of karmic sanctimonious goodliness

To truly be a Bodhisattva (enlightened and ready for the hells of samsara and awakening), the closest we have to sainthood, we have to be prepared and willing to 'do Nothing' to the best of our ability. In other words 'we haz plan': Here is another ...

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,

and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others,

even to the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter,

for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble,

it's a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;

many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.

Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love;

for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,

it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,

gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.

But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars;

you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you,

no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive him to be.

And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life,

keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

http://www.sfheart.com/desiderata.html

Lionduck

Well,@lobster, long winded, but nice.

Just being yourself, doing your best and stepping forth into each new day is worth celebrating.

When someone is lonely, be there
When someone is sad, lend a heart
When someone is lost, be a guide
When someone is happy, rejoice

Of course, when one is "Lobster", a little melted butter with a touch of garlic will do nicely.

Come to think of it, we don't need saints, we has Bodhisattvas.
What was that saying? Oh yes! "Give me lot and lots o' Bodhisattvas!"

Blame it on the caffeine withdrawal. (or the ADHD, why not!?)
Also, blame it on the spell checker.

Peace to all