I am deeply philosophical :(

leahnc

I am deeply attached to searching for meaning, truth in life (Mainly philosophical)

I ask the big questions & search obsessively for answers (mainly in books and online) I try to find answers to philosophical questions of all types! Language, creation, knowledge, reason!

Its not enjoyable & causes me great anxiety. I feel anxious by the questions themselves, but the answers usually add to the anxiety! Ugh!

This is quite contrary to where I was about a month ago. A month ago I was learning about Buddhism & had started to apply the 4 noble truths/8-fold path to my life. That is until I experienced emptiness & became very anxious. For a moment in that emptiness life seemed meaningless & this thought of course led to extreme anxiety! It was just a thought but my thoughts are generally rigid & demand answers? Uncertainty in life is difficult for me

If you read some of my other posts you will see that I am an anxious person. Im on medication, but my mind never stops racing, questioning? I just want to accept everything but find it difficult!

I just needed to vent. Thank you for reading!

federica

Have you come across the Buddha's teachings on unconjecturables?
Sometimes you have to ask yourself:
How conducive is this question, to enhancing and improving my current practice, now?
How conducive is the answer to this question, to enhancing and improving my current practice, now?


if the response is 'it would make little or no difference whatsoever', then chances are that it is actually detrimental, because it is making you falter in your progress, diverting you from your objective, and providing a distraction to what you should be doing.

Here is a link to the 4 Unconjecturables.

As you can see, the Buddha had an idea this problem would arise, a long time ago - !

http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an04/an04.077.than.html

'Philosophical' is good. But over-doing it - isn't!

Jason

This is quite contrary to where I was about a month ago. A month ago I was learning about Buddhism & had started to apply the 4 noble truths/8-fold path to my life. That is until I experienced emptiness & became very anxious. For a moment in that emptiness life seemed meaningless & this thought of course led to extreme anxiety! It was just a thought but my thoughts are generally rigid & demand answers? Uncertainty in life is difficult for me

I have the same problem. I generally take it day-by-day, and try to simplify things as much as possible, focusing on what's important in the here and now and whether my choices cause happiness or suffering. It's not always easy, though, and I tend to wander off into nihilism on my worst days. But emptiness, when used correctly, isn't about nihilism; it's about the freedom of seeing through illusions with wisdom and apprehending what truly matters.

zen_world

My friend, I had the same problem for a long time...
I can only tell you what worked for me...What you have discovered is a scary state. It will get better. As you contemplate more and more, than you will realize there are more subtle levels to it. It is suchness and lifeless so it scares many people at first. I really had hard time with it. Then I find the solution. Open your hearth chakra and be in emptiness single pointedly - as you progress it will bring more and more exctasy and bliss. Without bliss, it is not something easy to handle but with bliss it is quite enjoyable.
I am not recommending bliss as an attachment but it is a tool that you can use to ligten up your mind and body until you reach a point where you start appreciating emptiness with its true potential.
Don't get discouraged because your path is not ended yet. Build the wisdom that will give you the right insights.

Iktomi

Philosophy is the love of wisdom. Don't let anyone fool you, Leahnc.

Bekenze

Welcome to my world...

patbb

perhaps just read the "Daily Dhamma Drops" thread.

it may quench your thirst


Vipassana people like me may simply suggest to practice and get to the bottom of it.
also it is possible that you might be stuck in something called the dark knights.

especially possible since "experienced emptiness & became very anxious. For a moment in that emptiness life seemed meaningless"

it would require someone to analyze your practice and experience properly to make such diagnostic tho... but if this was the appropriate diagnostic, again if you were a vipassana meditator, it would be a great sign of progress and the advice would be the keep practicing.

In any case, just notice those feelings. those too are impermanent.
try to see them inside, try to see which thoughts they trigger...

genkaku

@leahnc -- Philosophy is the love of knowledge or wisdom. I practice, it is also a means of separating things, one from the next. Loving things in a philosophical way may sooth the intellect and con the emotions, but it doesn't ease the uncertainties in life. Philosophy and its realms are simply tools. No carpenter in his right mind falls in love with his tools. He simply uses them.

Using philosophy to address uncertainty or unsatisfactoriness in an actual-factual life is like using a screwdriver to pound a nail. It may work, sort of, but it isn't as efficient as a hammer.

The hammer in Buddhism, the tool that directly addresses uncertainty and dis-ease, is sometimes called meditation. This is a literal sit-down-shut-up-straighten-the-spine-and-focus-the-mind activity. This practice offers a realm in which to express our complete life -- thought, word and deed. Separation is given the opportunity to evaporate. There is nothing sexy or holy about it since your life and mine are already complete, but meditation provides the opportunity to express without reservation or discomfort what we already know.

From this standpoint, philosophy is OK ... just like Ritz crackers. Separation is OK and so-called oneness is OK.

A little meditation stands a better chance of answering the real questions in a living, breathing life than all the 'profound' questions in the world.

Or anyway, that's my take.

seeker242

You would LOVE my teacher and his lineage teachings, ha! They are zen masters and he always said things like:

"Don't know mind is your true nature"

"Only keep don't know"

"Human beings know how to know, but they don't know how to don't know, therefore they suffer"

Lady_Alison

My two cents is that it helps to have a good foundation... With an open mind read plato and the fathers of philosophy. Then have a good understanding of the three faiths judaism, christianity and islam. I mean really pursue the study and realize that it will take time.

Follow with archeology and history... Answers will become fewer to all your questions the deeper you get... What do they all have in common? This also includes buddhaism...btw.

I.ve learned that the golden rule applies accross the board and belief in god.

Spaceless

You are same as Buddha who has been searching truth in life since 19 years old until he finally rest himself under a fig tree at the age of about 30 years old, and truly awaken on the ultimate philosophy of life

Zero

In your unadulterated state, enjoyment is just as illusionary as non-enjoyment... if you feel that youre an anxious person then your responses to life will be anxious - you should consider varied methods to assist you with this (e.g. spiritual practice combined with say talk therapy - find a combination that works for you).

The first exprience of emptiness can be daunting - appreciating insignificance is challenging.

Dont be put off - continue naturally and see where it takes you - there are two sides to every coin! emptiness is nothing and everything - though you feel initially that your insignifance leads to nothing, you are also a part of the overall equation and no matter how insignificant a factor, it is still significant to the whole as without it the whole wouldnt be just so. (i.e. a part is as important as the whole)...

A neat analogy is drumming rhythem - there is alot of emphasis on when you strike a beat but when youre more advanced you learn the significance of a silent beat (i.e the spaces between the beat) - by intergrating silence into your rhythem you can dramatically change a beat and make it richer...

Dont be afraid of the silence... it means you no specific harm!!

You may benefit from being with a teacher - those with more experience can help guide you when you face challenges that seem insurmountable.

shanyin

I may be in the same boat. Once in a while when I meditate and my incenssant thinking/anylzying and negative thinking seems to go away for a bit.

The Daily Dharma Drops suggestion is something I have indeed tried myself because of I think similar mental habits as you that's why I gave it a like.

Lots of good advice here maybe. Fed is straightforward as usual

shanyin

One friend I have when asked if she meditates she said "yes, that's why I'm not negative". That's something I think I find myself sometimes, my analyzing and negative mental thinking habits seem sort of useless and the (not to sound like Eckhart Tolle) here and now seems more complete.

Maybe this ties into the bliss advice someone mentioned but perhaps yes maybe find a mindfulness meditatin like mindfuless or breathing or counting. Reiki aparently helps to open all of your chakras but if you are interested in opening your heart chakra maybe look it up or I could ask my Shamanic Reiki healer friend how you can focus on opening it if your into that.

shanyin

The Buddha taught that when mindfulness of breathing becomes a foundation in our life that one can expect the blessing of knowing yourself.

leahnc

Wow - Thank you for the great advice everyone!!!

I appreciate it so much!

maarten

My take is that only your ego is threatened by emptiness. The one night in which I had really (I mean: really!) bad anxiety I felt my ego was about to be squashed. Probably, it is also ego that is searching for a sense of certainty by trying to find answers in philosophy ("if only I can find the answers to the great questions, there will be peace and tranquility"). What might help is to focus on relaxation. If you have sensations of emptiness, but can relax a little (the more the better of course), you might find that nothing bad happens, and emptiness is not so threatening after all. And if you can find good company, that will have a reassuring effect as well. The more often you do this, the easier it will become, in my experience.