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Dump Your Negative Attachments Here

ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
edited February 2013 in General Banter
The internet, alcohol, delusional desires, nostalgic past moments, my mother, my computer and that is all I can think of a the moment.
BunksWisdom23

Comments

  • CoryCory Tennessee Veteran
    My computer, procrastination, small lies, stress. Not much I can think of, but they impact me in a serious way. Computers are so useful, but at the same time, I wish I never had one. All it does is consume my time, and in this day in age, you can't go anywhere without using one. My computer is the biggest link in my procrastination, my procrastination makes small lies like "yes I got my work done" and these small lies lead to my stress in the long run because if I would just say that I didn't get the work done, I would probably get more slack for being truthful.
  • shanyinshanyin Novice Yogin Sault Ontario Veteran
    edited February 2013
    ciggarettes
  • I think in all of these things @Cory they have attachment because we build a 'self' around them, that is not to say we think they are alive but we conceptualize them. They all are like Ying & Yang, they have pros and cons and most of them can be used by us without attachment, but that is easier said than done.

    On the flip side there is something I am sure most of us have thought about or know about, but I have not seen it spoken about and that is negative dis-attachment. That can be just as bad for yourself as attachment, again I find myself coming back to the middle way :rolleyes:
    Dandelion
  • BunksBunks Australia Veteran
    Greed, aversion and delusion..... :thumbsup:
  • vinlynvinlyn Colorado...for now Veteran
    So since a couple of you are dumping your attachment to the internet here, I assume we won't be seeing you anymore?
    NirvanaBunks
  • vinlyn said:

    So since a couple of you are dumping your attachment to the internet here, I assume we won't be seeing you anymore?

    So if somebody is rid of their attachment to enjoying a walk through the park on a summers day, does that mean they can no longer walk through the park?
    Nirvana
  • vinlynvinlyn Colorado...for now Veteran
    Of course not. But why don't you be a little more specific about what you're going to do? Or not do?
  • I am pretty non-specific guy some of the time? By 'dump here' I literally meant post what attachments you have at the moment that seem to have a negative impact on your life, simply.
  • TheEccentricTheEccentric Hampshire, UK Veteran
    Staying up late, my computer, my chickens, binge eating, weekends and holidays.
  • ZenBadgerZenBadger Derbyshire, UK Veteran
    Beer festivals, I only drink when there is a festival nearby. Unfortunately there is a festival nearby about once a month and since I am not used to alcohol I tend to overindulge and have evil hangovers. I sometimes wish there was a nice cup of tea and a sit down with biscuits and fancy cakes festival...
    Bunks
  • ZenBadger said:

    Beer festivals, I only drink when there is a festival nearby. Unfortunately there is a festival nearby about once a month and since I am not used to alcohol I tend to overindulge and have evil hangovers. I sometimes wish there was a nice cup of tea and a sit down with biscuits and fancy cakes festival...

    It's called a picnic with your friends... hehe. I am drinking right now, alcohol that is. I have only had one sip as of yet but meh. I am not exactly drinking daily but I know there is an attachment there. I think there is a deep interwoven attachment to not being sober I have had since I was 14 and alcohol is not the prime suspect. Ever feel like you are taking 2 steps forward and then 1 step back spiritually speaking? I know the phrase is 1 step forward and 2 back, but I feel like I do make progress and then back track just a little.

    One of my main attachments on closer inspection though is fantasies, I think we all have them from time to time. It could be a vacation, a person, an object, w/e it is we can be there day-dreaming about it and not even realizing that we are. To notice you are and say "hey, I am doing that crap again" is wise and the first steps to getting over it IMO. Observation, inspection, become chief detective on the self, the self is a mas murderer of wisdom.
  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran
    nice cup of tea and a sit down with biscuits and fancy cakes festival...
    Just had some home made carrot cake for breakfast, I consider it one one of my five a day
    http://www.nhs.uk/LiveWell/5ADAY/Pages/5ADAYhome.aspx

    guess I am delusional
    :bawl:

    I have a tendency to be wise without due care and attention (nearly given up on that)
    I overfeed hungry ghosts, eat carcasses and defenceless fish
    I advocate kicking monks back into the meditation hall until enlightened . . .

    Forgive me Buddha for I have unskilfully
    Sinned

    I have been bad to demons, inviting them to feed on my bad bits
    I drank a whole hobgoblin beer and dreamt of satyrs

    I am wasting my time meditating whilst sentient grass is trying to evolve . . .

    I have hope and other positive arisings. :hair:

    I make up mantras and chant them.

    I subject turn harmless computers into objects of veneration


    Bad, bad crustacean . . .

    chela
  • SabbySabby Explorer
    In all seriousness, Girls..
  • NirvanaNirvana aka BUBBA   `     `   South Carolina, USA Veteran
    I don't understand the request/question. Take off the word negative and I could go on and on with my encumbering attachments.
    Top of the list would be my nieces and nephews, and my grand nieces and grand nephews. I'm way too crazy about them and spend inordinate amounts of time and money with things concerning them.
    lobsterInvincible_summer
  • I'm with you on that Nirvana. I'm pretty happy with most of the things I'm attached to.
    Family of course. They are all amazing, especially the young ones. So accomplished.
    I'm attached to this iPad, but I really like it. It's a great device for sure.
    Boats too. Their shape draws my eyes to them.
    And the vehicles I have right now. I know they will soon be piles of scrap but I'm enjoying them while they last.
    lobster
  • This website... Namaste.
    lobsterInvincible_summer
  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran
    Live more. Love more.

    Don't have a cow.

    You want to end suffering? Good luck with that. Develop your good habits. Listing bad habits and we will be here for ever - and that is just me . . . :o
    MaryAnneWisdom23
  • robot said:

    I'm with you on that Nirvana. I'm pretty happy with most of the things I'm attached to.
    Family of course. They are all amazing, especially the young ones. So accomplished.
    I'm attached to this iPad, but I really like it. It's a great device for sure.
    Boats too. Their shape draws my eyes to them.
    And the vehicles I have right now. I know they will soon be piles of scrap but I'm enjoying them while they last.


    So you are fine being attached to things? I guess it comes down to what you exactly define as being attached. I refer to what the dharma points to which is a negative way to relating to external phenomena in our lives. If you have no negative attachments then you must be very very close to liberation.
  • ZendoLord84ZendoLord84 Veteran
    edited February 2013
    Some very angry frustrated folks on this website.
  • robot said:

    I'm with you on that Nirvana. I'm pretty happy with most of the things I'm attached to.
    Family of course. They are all amazing, especially the young ones. So accomplished.
    I'm attached to this iPad, but I really like it. It's a great device for sure.
    Boats too. Their shape draws my eyes to them.
    And the vehicles I have right now. I know they will soon be piles of scrap but I'm enjoying them while they last.


    So you are fine being attached to things? I guess it comes down to what you exactly define as being attached. I refer to what the dharma points to which is a negative way to relating to external phenomena in our lives. If you have no negative attachments then you must be very very close to liberation.
    Why would you include your mum as a negative attachment?

    I would say that dharma points to attachment to every sensory input that I experience when I get out of bed each morning.
    Good or bad, if I dont realize its empty nature, I'm attached.
    So technically I am attached to my aches and pains as well, which I don't really care for. I am also attached to the sometimes painful mental feelings that go along with growing older. Parents gone. Children grown. Body showing undeniable signs of old age around the corner. On the downhill side of life.
    But, being older I have had the benefit of experience that helps me to make fewer painful mistakes.
    Also, I have found a way to balance my income with my expectations so I am not often surprised or disappointed by sudden uncontrollable changes in my situation.
    Closing in on retirement, I have no grand dreams only some modest hopes.
    Also, I have been through relationship hell including legal and financial trials by fire. That's history now, not to be repeated. You can be sure I was attached at that time.
    So, far from liberated, I have a small degree of contentment. I guess you could say that I am fine with being attached to things. Take the bad with the good.
  • robot said:

    robot said:

    I'm with you on that Nirvana. I'm pretty happy with most of the things I'm attached to.
    Family of course. They are all amazing, especially the young ones. So accomplished.
    I'm attached to this iPad, but I really like it. It's a great device for sure.
    Boats too. Their shape draws my eyes to them.
    And the vehicles I have right now. I know they will soon be piles of scrap but I'm enjoying them while they last.


    So you are fine being attached to things? I guess it comes down to what you exactly define as being attached. I refer to what the dharma points to which is a negative way to relating to external phenomena in our lives. If you have no negative attachments then you must be very very close to liberation.
    Why would you include your mum as a negative attachment?

    I would say that dharma points to attachment to every sensory input that I experience when I get out of bed each morning.
    Good or bad, if I dont realize its empty nature, I'm attached.
    So technically I am attached to my aches and pains as well, which I don't really care for. I am also attached to the sometimes painful mental feelings that go along with growing older. Parents gone. Children grown. Body showing undeniable signs of old age around the corner. On the downhill side of life.
    But, being older I have had the benefit of experience that helps me to make fewer painful mistakes.
    Also, I have found a way to balance my income with my expectations so I am not often surprised or disappointed by sudden uncontrollable changes in my situation.
    Closing in on retirement, I have no grand dreams only some modest hopes.
    Also, I have been through relationship hell including legal and financial trials by fire. That's history now, not to be repeated. You can be sure I was attached at that time.
    So, far from liberated, I have a small degree of contentment. I guess you could say that I am fine with being attached to things. Take the bad with the good.
    I can only speak from my own experience but I have a negative attachment to my mother for sure. Of course I love her but I also have an attachment. I can feel it when I met her for the first time in 3 years not long ago, I saw her aged and sad and I could feel a glimpse, an insight into how I would feel when she is gone totally. That is a negative attachment and sorry if you don't understand that or acknowledge that, but to me it seems pretty simple and obvious..
  • The tendency to let myself wallow in negative emotions, my current living situation (which must soon change), my tendency to be very day dreamy, and procrastination are all current big ones for me.
  • BunksBunks Australia Veteran
    Good looking girls with nice bums......

    (I hope my wife doesn't read this!)
    ThailandTomlobsterTheEccentric
  • NirvanaNirvana aka BUBBA   `     `   South Carolina, USA Veteran
    edited February 2013
    This thread is WAY over my head. In Other Words, what is meant by negative attachments? Are you talking about unprofitable/unhealthy/dead-end attachments —or just attachments period?

    I'm far from liberated, but I don't think I have any negative attachments at all. I'm not attached to anything negative.

    Are you wanting to hear some personality quirks such as disdain for tailgaiters and loud people? The way I see it I'm ATTACHED to sufficient space behind me when I'm motoring and am ATTACHED to just a little bit of peace and quiet. And every now and again I'd just like to hear a few kind words. :)
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    Negative thoughts in general, my emotions...Need to have more control and more focus. Mindfulness needs to be my middle name!!!
    ThailandTom
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    edited February 2013
    Nirvana said:

    This thread is WAY over my head. In Other Words, what is meant by negative attachments? Are you talking about unprofitable/unhealthy/dead-end attachments —or just attachments period?

    I'm far from liberated, but I don't think I have any negative attachments at all. I'm not attached to anything negative.

    Are you wanting to hear some personality quirks such as disdain for tailgaiters and loud people? The way I see it I'm ATTACHED to sufficient space behind me when I'm motoring and am ATTACHED to just a little bit of peace and quiet. And every now and again I'd just like to hear a few kind words. :)

    From where I am looking from there are maybe two-three options here, one you have totally broken free from all forms of attachment (attachment in itself is negative), two you do not understand what I am talking about as I have never worded it correctly, or three you are delusional.

    How can you be attached to something and it not cause you suffering some time along the way in some shape or form? "Oh I love my new computer, it is great, I am attached to it." Two weeks later somebody steals it and how would you feel if you were attached to it?

    Maybe if we go back to basics here Nirvana, the 4NTs, read this.

    1. Life means suffering.

    To live means to suffer, because the human nature is not perfect and neither is the world we live in. During our lifetime, we inevitably have to endure physical suffering such as pain, sickness, injury, tiredness, old age, and eventually death; and we have to endure psychological suffering like sadness, fear, frustration, disappointment, and depression. Although there are different degrees of suffering and there are also positive experiences in life that we perceive as the opposite of suffering, such as ease, comfort and happiness, life in its totality is imperfect and incomplete, because our world is subject to impermanence. This means we are never able to keep permanently what we strive for, and just as happy moments pass by, we ourselves and our loved ones will pass away one day, too.

    2. The origin of suffering is attachment.

    The origin of suffering is attachment to transient things and the ignorance thereof. Transient things do not only include the physical objects that surround us, but also ideas, and -in a greater sense- all objects of our perception. Ignorance is the lack of understanding of how our mind is attached to impermanent things. The reasons for suffering are desire, passion, ardour, pursuit of wealth and prestige, striving for fame and popularity, or in short: craving and clinging. Because the objects of our attachment are transient, their loss is inevitable, thus suffering will necessarily follow. Objects of attachment also include the idea of a "self" which is a delusion, because there is no abiding self. What we call "self" is just an imagined entity, and we are merely a part of the ceaseless becoming of the universe.

    3. The cessation of suffering is attainable.

    The cessation of suffering can be attained through nirodha. Nirodha means the unmaking of sensual craving and conceptual attachment. The third noble truth expresses the idea that suffering can be ended by attaining dispassion. Nirodha extinguishes all forms of clinging and attachment. This means that suffering can be overcome through human activity, simply by removing the cause of suffering. Attaining and perfecting dispassion is a process of many levels that ultimately results in the state of Nirvana. Nirvana means freedom from all worries, troubles, complexes, fabrications and ideas. Nirvana is not comprehensible for those who have not attained it.

    4. The path to the cessation of suffering.

    There is a path to the end of suffering - a gradual path of self-improvement, which is described more detailed in the Eightfold Path. It is the middle way between the two extremes of excessive self-indulgence (hedonism) and excessive self-mortification (asceticism); and it leads to the end of the cycle of rebirth. The latter quality discerns it from other paths which are merely "wandering on the wheel of becoming", because these do not have a final object. The path to the end of suffering can extend over many lifetimes, throughout which every individual rebirth is subject to karmic conditioning. Craving, ignorance, delusions, and its effects will disappear gradually, as progress is made on the path.
  • No room for attachments when you hear persecutory voices all day. Every day is just getting through the day. Thank God I have diversions and I still do my meditation.
  • Here they are.
    Nirvana
  • NirvanaNirvana aka BUBBA   `     `   South Carolina, USA Veteran
    edited February 2013
    I am positively attached to my iPad, but feel very negative about its abysmal photo albuming capabilities. I spent many hours arranging a recent Rome trip album on iPad, but they all disappeared today when I synced 25 art museum photis from iPhoto.

    I am attached to my attachments. Does that count, @ThailandTom?
  • Nirvana said:

    I am positively attached to my iPad, but feel very negative about its abysmal photo albuming capabilities. I spent many hours arranging a recent Rome trip album on iPad, but they all disappeared today when I synced 25 art museum photis from iPhoto.

    I am attached to my attachments. Does that count, @ThailandTom?

    Yes it does, any form of attachment leads to suffering which is of course a negative outcomes. Once you are re leaved of your defilement's then you can go on and experience Buddha-nature. Craving, clinging, attachment, it's all the same shizzle. You can even be attached to being a Buddhist and doing good things, again with the middle way. Buddhists can become so engrossed in doing good that they get attached to the feeling and outcomes that they suffer eventually.
  • Rock bottom low self esteem and anxiety lol although i am learning lol awesome thread though
    NirvanaThailandTom
  • DandelionDandelion London Veteran
    chocolate, cheese, cats, procrastination, anger, hating rude people (really working on improving that one)... these are the ones that feature most prominently in my life.
  • Such a list would be too long! But one's that seem particularly obvious to me at the moment, which I am slowly working on (with greater or lesser degrees of success): phone calls from work when I am at home, a variety of unexpected situations at work, pizza (my 'stress food').

    More deeply rooted (but related to the above): an attachment to (a dualistic sense of) peace and tranquility, procrastination, and music.

    /\
  • DandelionDandelion London Veteran
    @riverflow I am with you on the pizza. What is it that goes into takeaway pizza's that make them sooo addictive? I am never addicted to my own home made ones :p !!
    riverflow
  • howhow Veteran Veteran
    My partner specializes in making irresistable gourmet pizzas. They just appear in front of me. I tear apart those attachments with my teeth and call my partner Mara.
    riverflowDandelionThailandTom
  • DandelionDandelion London Veteran
    how said:

    My partner specializes in making irresistable gourmet pizzas. They just appear in front of me. I tear apart those attachments with my teeth and call my partner Mara.

    if they just appear in front of you then what can you do. It would be rude not to accept

    :D
  • GuiGui Veteran
    I truly don't understand the question.
    But, that said, I will dump at this moment
    attachments to Buddhism
    and that which is not Buddhism.
  • GuiGui Veteran
    edited February 2013
    I have to ask.
    What is a positive attachment?
    riverflowNirvana
  • Gui said:

    I have to ask.
    What is a positive attachment?

    OKOK!! When I made the thread I did not think about the title well enough, shoot me down right here for it lol. I have actually said myself that all attachment is negative in this very thread, if I could still change the title I would, so sorry..
    Nirvana
  • GuiGui Veteran
    No bother at all. I thought I was missing something. I usually am.
  • NirvanaNirvana aka BUBBA   `     `   South Carolina, USA Veteran
    edited February 2013
    MY Feelings Exactly.

    One of my attachments is NewBuddhist.com. Am also attached to those thread-creators that push the meanie ones down to the bottom of the pile.
    LOL
  • Sleep, good food (although I'm really working on that one), my laptop, possibly my cat. I'm sure there's more but those are easily the most prominent. It feels good to get that out in the open!
  • The way to deal with attachments is to be there fully undivided. Not one side knocking the other. Fully embrace your attachment full force. If it is hurting you then eventually you will have a clarity to stop it. Either you or the negative attachment will die. Crucify yourself in getting off of the attachment. But don't knock yourself.
    ThailandTom
  • I throw out my attachment to non-boredom. I could see the spaciousness of boredome but I choose to worry about if I am doing something wrong or if I am something wrong.
  • Jeffrey said:

    I throw out my attachment to non-boredom. I could see the spaciousness of boredome but I choose to worry about if I am doing something wrong or if I am something wrong.

    Boredom is one of the attachments I am feeling a lot at the moment, if I am not working I find myself feeling empty and as if I am 'missing something', tossing and turning in dukkha and being an ignorant jerk basically. Have to work on that one.
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