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Fear of causing harm
slowmichael
Explorer
I have been meditating since a few years and reading a lot about buddhism, visited some local sanga's. Well i consider myself a beginner but i try to walk the path. I must say this has been benificial for me but also for my children my wife.... . I am very grateful for that.
Since i was young i suffer from OCD, luckily i had some great therapists and also i met somebody that is a yoga teacher but is very interested in all things spiritual, this man opened my eyes. My OCD is still there but it has diminished much.
The trigger for my OCD is the idea that i could have done something in a way that this could cause harm other people. Example i mounted something to the ceiling (a light), oh did i do it good enough.... maybe somebody could get injured or killed !! Well as i said these days i am mostly able to let it be.
However basically my brain is like always scanning for these kind of possibilities, causing a constant flow of mild fear and guilt. That is what i found when meditating, and i sit with this undercurrent when meditating feeling what it does inside my body. Sometimes it get's to me and i have a lot of anxiety.
Well a big part of buddhism is not causing harm to other beings. OK this is within the range of what a "normal" person would consider as taking enough precautions in order to cause no harm. Anyway i never found a buddhism quote on that one could exaggerate in this "causing no harm".
Any input is welcome.
Michel
Since i was young i suffer from OCD, luckily i had some great therapists and also i met somebody that is a yoga teacher but is very interested in all things spiritual, this man opened my eyes. My OCD is still there but it has diminished much.
The trigger for my OCD is the idea that i could have done something in a way that this could cause harm other people. Example i mounted something to the ceiling (a light), oh did i do it good enough.... maybe somebody could get injured or killed !! Well as i said these days i am mostly able to let it be.
However basically my brain is like always scanning for these kind of possibilities, causing a constant flow of mild fear and guilt. That is what i found when meditating, and i sit with this undercurrent when meditating feeling what it does inside my body. Sometimes it get's to me and i have a lot of anxiety.
Well a big part of buddhism is not causing harm to other beings. OK this is within the range of what a "normal" person would consider as taking enough precautions in order to cause no harm. Anyway i never found a buddhism quote on that one could exaggerate in this "causing no harm".
Any input is welcome.
Michel
0
Comments
I don't know if there is a Buddhisdt quote, but here is one from Ralph Waldo Emerson;
"Don’t be squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment.”
In terms of practice, perhaps you can get a compulsion to practice a certain number of mantra? In other words use the tendency - this might not be appropriate, discuss with therapist or use your own wider judgement. I do know that some tantric practitioners make use of our negative traits and other impediments as a means to enhanced practice.
http://spiritualocd.blogdrive.com/
Happy to hear that you are recovering. I must say i had it really bad, started when i was 19 years old now it is a shadow of what it used to be, although it can still hurt me badly. I used to try and escape from it by working and sporting very hard, basically i was burning myself up but i avoided my emotions that actually worked for a long time. But it did not last. I had a burnout and i was broken emotionally but i also got quit ill physically . Looking back it was the best thing that could happen to me. I changed. I have twins and they where 4 years old when that happened. I met this great spiritual yoga teacher and he made me do all kinds of stuff. I started playing and building things with my kids i now have a very good relationship whit my kids. Before i was never at home. He showed me the path of meditation and some spiritual insights that helped me a lot.
Well you gave me a quote, i read a lot of books one of the best was written by Jeff Bell
"when in doubt make belief". It helped me a lot funny but deep and practical.
“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” – Buddha
Ah ok yes that is so true. I just feel i am not worthy enough to treat myself this way, i understand that this quote is spot on and necessary but something in me labels it as selfishness. I was raised this way, conditioned this way. That is a big part of the problem.
Thank you for the link never seen such an approach.
It's just the best I can figure.
A disciple of the Buddha had stopped walking and stopped breathing. The Buddha asked him why he was doing that?
He answered that he realized he was killing living being in his breathing process and through walking.
The Buddha told him to stop doing that! You can't think like that!
Buddhists talk alot about compassion, it also means having compassion for yourself.
I had similar issues in my late 20s and early 30s. Obsessing constantly about my fears of causing harm to others. Thankfully, these anxieties receded after a few years and they don't bother me much now, although I'll probably always be vulnerable to OCD to some degree. Meditation and breath exercises helped a great deal, as well as learning more about how the brain produces these fears and anxieties. It sounds like you are getting the kind of advice and therapy that you need.
If I understand your question rightly, you're asking whether Buddhism encourages us to obsess anxiously about the harm we could be doing to others. I don't think that's the case. Another Indian religion known as Jainism is more like that. The Buddha, by contrast, taught the "Middle Way" which is about gradual progress towards enlightenment by means of a path and practice. This involves sila (discipline), samadhi (concentration) and panna (insight).
"Causing no harm" is part of sila, but no one's asking us to be perfect. The Buddhist approach, as I understand it at least, is to undertake precepts -- the five precepts taken by most laypeople, or the more comprehensive set which applies to monastics (or really dedicated lay practitioners). Also, as others have mentioned above, Buddhism emphasizes intention -- i.e. what's important are volitional acts of body, speech or mind.
I assume you're seeing a therapist if you're as badly affected by OCD as you say, so talk to him/her about CBT and adhere to Buddhist thinking and you could be in the way to improving your life. I made a little joke about OCD as the Zen side of my recovery involves humour.
I wish you well Michel
Namaste
Chinese saying
Quit usefull.
Regards
Michel