well shucks!
genkaku
Northampton, Mass. U.S.A. Veteran
Elsewhere on NewBuddhist there are various people who use cuss words. I thank the stars above that I am not alone. But now and then, a more proper person than I will insert a symbol for one of the cuss-word's letters. For example, "bullshit" is apparently too no-no, but "bullsh!t" passes muster.
My own aging bones are too cranky to pull those sorts of shenanigans. If "bullshit" is considered wrong speech how can "bullsh!t" be any different, since any reader past the age of five knows precisely what is intended? If everyone knows, then why play the goodie-two-shoes card? I always thought one of the nice things about Buddhism was that it was straightforward so ... why mess about?
For all I know, there are NewBuddhist rules about using cuss words ... some fine print I probably OK'd without reading terribly attentively in order to post here. I try not to overdo it, but any virtue I once had has long since moved to Saskatchewan so ... aw heck! ... I goof, from the pure-of-tongue point of view.
Leaving the rules aside for a moment ... what's your feeling about what I think of as having "cute" written all over it? Those who refrain altogether should feel free at this juncture to take the high seat and orate for the rest of us. But I'm more interested in the views that hold that "bullshit" (to stick with that example) is out of bounds but "bullsh!t" is not.
I'm not trying to make a federal case out of it ... just playing Curious George.
Silly and serious answers appreciated.
Comments
Sh!t is shit. I wish I could make that sound prettier, but, that's kind of how I see it. I think it's a way of not taking responsibility for what you are saying.
Just me though, I'm still new at this.
Long ago I made a point about cussing on this site and was told there was no rule against it by one of the main moderators.
Welcome @ajhayes. Hope you find something useful here.
And if you don't mind, I want to co-opt the encouragement used on your profile: "If you don't know where to start, go back to the beginning." When I grow up, I hope I can say something like that ... very nice.
I prefer not to see words like fuck and cunt. They're really expressly quite vulgar, and I think, wholly unnecessary on this forum. Quite how one would incorporate those into a standard post without considering appropriate/right/skilful speech., I'm not sure.
It's hard to imagine anyone using those words without some kind of insult being involved.
Rules on this forum are not written anywhere, because it is expected that people will conform to societal norms of polite, courteous and generally acceptable behaviour.
It will not have gone unnoticed, I am sure, that when members resort to insulting, belittling and provocative posts, I have never hesitated to bring such attitude to an abrupt halt.
(I have to at this point as a matter of courtesy, given that the matter is pertinent, express gratitude to all members for abstaining from subsequent comment when I perform certain unpleasant but necessary tasks in suspension or banning of members. It is rare indeed for me - or even other Moderators - to have to field questions, comments or remarks regarding Moderator action.
I would also add that I do not take this restraint on your [collective] part, to be an automatic agreement of my actions. I take it as the courtesy and respect kindly afforded me, while I try my best to perform my duties mindfully.)
Back to profanities: To summarise -
In jest, they can be apposite, suitable and funny. ( who 'dafuq' woulda thunked it...?!)
As insults, or when purposely directed at other people as a form of attack, they are entirely unacceptable, and will be dealt with accordingly.
I'm pretty sure I was a man more often than not in my many past lives - if there is such a thing - because I truly enjoy cutting loose -- but I restrain myself most of the time. I'm not sure I'll get the hang of this woman gig -- maybe in a few more hundred lifetimes or something. I don't even know why I do the bullsh*t thing, but it's a habit I've gotten into.
Reminds me of a friend's distaste for my use of "frickin" in speech, and "effing" in writing. But I kind of like them. Feels like I'm getting the emphasis across sans the aggressive shock factor. But maybe it's just "cute"? hmm.
When I first entered the business world many decades ago, I was amazed at the number of male VPs and managers who used the F word with aplomb at formal meetings and presentations. Women were a distinct minority in my field then and I wonder if there was a connection.
As for the site, it seems (via observation) to me that in general discussion it's not against the rules, but directed at a member it can get you in trouble.
I occasionally do it. Not here much, just in general. Why? I don't know. Certainly not to avoid actually using the non-censored word. I guess in some way it is a more gentle way to express the same thing, as some people are inherently offended at cuss words so it's kind of a compromise. I don't use any of the "biggies" but I swear on occasion in writing and verbally. Mostly when I am driving, lol. I am better than I used to be, and I don't usually do it in anger, but more a way to get the frustration out in a more humorous way. So perhaps that carries over a bit as well, to take some of the sting or edge out of a naughty word while still utilizing it. I rarely direct swear words at people. They are just an expression of my frustration (or whatever). Things like "Ass biscuits!! I forgot my mail key!" and my kids think it's hilarious. But then the 6 year old yells "ASS BISCUITS!!" from the back seat and I have to tell him he can't say that at his age, lol.
Language, written especially, is always curious. There is so much attached to it in perception that never comes across. Even something so simple as clicking a "like" button on Facebook is met with questions and criticisms when people don't understand that you don't actually like the content but are liking the post to acknowledge you read it.
Anyhow, for me it's not about avoiding the actual word, or even playing cute by it. It's just an expression that isn't quite so "in your face" as the fully spelled, actual word.
"Ass biscuits" -- I like it.
And it reminded me of the time when my kids were little and, like all kids, testing the waters of cussing. Here's a column I wrote some time ago that includes my own experiment with my two then-young sons. Sorry, I haven't got the energy to reprise it here... a bit of fun.
We all know, I'm a cusser. I cuss...BUT...I don't when I'm mad, and I don't cuss AT anyone.
Theres a skill to it, what can I say.. hahahaha
I iz H!nayanist! [sorry for any offence - off to eat soap]
I have cut and pasted the following from an an old thread
In John Wilson's book called "Language And The Pursuit Of Truth" ( he is an English philosopher- I think he wrote it back in the 1950s)
He writes about the 'unmentionables' such as blasphemy and obscene words...
"Perhaps the most interesting example of this comes from the last century(he's referring to the 18th century)when what we now call 'trousers' were not supposed to be mentioned.Unfortunately the practical usefulness of referring to the garments was too great to be overcome. Yet the taboo against the word 'trousers' still held. What happened was that the word was replaced by the word 'unmentionables' which as precisely the same meaning. This sort of taboo still exists in a rather lessened form today. It is still injudicious and impolite, when in certain circles, to refer directly to articles of 'ladies' underclothing by their standard name "
"He goes on to say that we regard those words as magical which refer to things that have a great emotional appeal to us, or that are regarded as private and sacred in some special way...Hence most 'unmentionable' words are either religious or sexual "
Yesterday I heard someone shout "Fuck Scunthorpe" for no reason whatsoever! People are strange... (doo doo)!
I can empathise.....
I think the symbols such as bullsh1t or lmbo (instead of lmao) are just an optional vibe. Why do people say 'pardon my french'?
I post on a video game forum with wonderful people who are funny and we discuss the game and socialize. I am part of a 'clan' (in game) on that forum. But the two founders who I know from both the posts and in game chat have made the decision not to allow swear words on their forum for whatever reason. If you type 'wtf' it will be edited to 'holy hanah'. I could not care less about whether swearing is allowed though.
Was this in Scunthorpe?