Compassion languages?
person
Don't believe everything you thinkThe liminal space Veteran
Some of you may be familiar with the notion of love languages, I'm wondering if there could be something similar in how we feel or express compassion.
For example, I seem to be more likely to be moved by stories or efforts that help empower poor people, focusing on things like teaching financial literacy, job training or parenting skills more than I am things that are focused on taking care, like providing food or shelter.
Or someone might be more moved by larger social or systemic suffering where another might be more moved by the suffering of individuals. I'm thinking of my Aunt who is always sharing things on Facebook about missing kids or how someone went above and beyond to help someone in distress, but never anything about the state of the world.
I can understand the need or use of all of them, but some are more salient to me. And I would assume that is how most people are.
Comments
The word for 'Compassion' in Maori is "Arohanui" ...Aroha means 'Love' and Nui means 'Big'...So...Compassion... the language of Love...Big Love...
In work we focus on the individual client's needs ......and there are many individuals with many different needs to focus upon...
I love the Maori language. I love listening to my cousins when they speak it.
???
On first seeing the topic I was thinking about how certain languages encourage love and feeling emotional. French for example is very much a heart language, while German is much more practical in nature. Which makes me wonder, is there a language which when you speak it encourages you to express your compassion more?
Italian.
Virgilio, Dante, Manzoni, Veneziano...
To hear their words, and read their poetry is to be transported to a place before your heart beated, and feel the pulse of passion...
is our eyes made for tears?is our tears multifacet ? tears of joy,tears of gratitude,and tears of compassion.our eyes has lived through theese tears.our tears can be our companion through compassion.
which leads to the subject of soft and strong in our emotional intelligence with regard to compassion.
Poetry, tears, humour.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Language_of_the_birds
Music has its cymbals
poets symbols
There are so many. Freemasons use ritual and symbols as their language.
Some say when the tears are (s)wept away, the dust beneath our feet is the revelation itself ...
"Arohanui" ...
This made me think of another possible "language". The tender compassion of someone who might patiently sit at the deathbed of someone dying of cancer and the strong compassion of someone who rushes into a burning building to save someone in danger.
Fearlessness or selflessness compassion ?
I don't know that those two are mutually exclusive. Just because someone isn't afraid of a dangerous situation doesn't mean they will care about the well being of anyone in danger.
I can't remember where I heard this being talked about, but one podcast I listened to was talking about these sorts of "heroic" actions, like Wesley Autrey who jumped on top of a man having a seizure on a subway rail while the train drove over them or someone who suffered severe burns himself rescuing another from a burning car. Interviewing these sorts of people they generally talk about how they didn't even think about themselves and had strong empathy for the person in danger. That kind of sounds like the definition of selfless and compassion.
I don't know, maybe these sorts of heroic actions aren't compassion and could be characterized as something else. I'm wondering though if what we consider as the "language" of what qualifies as compassion are too narrow. Like love languages, the way one person expresses love maybe doesn't speak to another's language, but that doesn't mean its not love.
Maybe all our definitions are too narrow and don't really encompass the diversity of human beings. Buddhist hospice work focuses on the ability to be open and present and recognizes how hard it can be to do that without shutting down while society normally thinks of something like hospice work as easy.
exactly. they respond to the need of the situation through our mind-heart.
our mind heart can speak through body language as an act of compassion. a smile and a peace sign is universally recieved--for the most part--without spoken language.
also just being there and listening can be an act of compassion.
It is also about recognising those things that come from the compassionate impulse. I admire people who do volunteering, whether it’s cooking or being at a hospice for the dying.
I actually don't think I know anyone who thinks Hospice work as 'easy'. Admirable, noble, dedicated, yes. Easy? Nope. Never come across that sentiment....
Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.
God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.
(1 John 4:8 and 4:16b)
Some believe introducing Cod is a red herring ...
However this theistic sentiment is the basis of Gnostic teaching in the inner Abrahamic tradition. For example in the Sufi model, it is the softening of the heart to existing forms of love and widening that appreciation that awakens the knowing ...
http://sufiway.net/ar_Sufism_Love_Mahabba.html
Love without reason ...
... and now back to the burst bubbles ...
The term 'mind-heart' is exactly it, when they work together it can be awesome. I feel that 'deep listening' is the most compassionate act we can perform, to be listened to is an amazing experience and so rare that you always know when it happens
I like that, I don't know that compassion languages are a real thing but this sort of thing seems like a good candidate for a language category as what some or many people would resonate with.
hi @kando. our heart beats;our mind pulsate.one is of function,as we know.lets get that heart crculating our brain.the other is potentially of purpose or intention.one of my eurika moment was the heart was not outside the brain but central to our intention and volition.our hero,sidhartha knew about that.for that we are grateful.when someone says you speak to my heart,it could also mean you spoke directly to my mind that moved me in a profound way.the language of sincerity with honest intonation sometimes if present,can move me.
i whole heartedly agree deep listening can bond and connect with each other.sidhartha is keen on friendship when addressing to ananda to bond and support.having good friends to talk to helps us grow--like excerise--our mind-heart central organ in our human body.
Watching the Mind and Life conference today reminded me how much I resonate with the Tibetan approach to mental and emotional suffering. Their compassion language.
...and how much I still have struggles with their metaphysics and maybe epistemology.
I was reflecting on a couple fictional characters, Sherlock Holmes and the Doctor (from Doctor Who). Both of them are often inconsiderate of others feelings or even abrasive, they are highly focused on competence, practicality, effectiveness. But they are both deeply caring characters, spending their lives in the pursuit of helping others.
It seems like that sort of behavior could be considered compassionate.
It's a bit of a paradox to me, they are often harsh or even cruel with others emotions but have a larger picture of being of benefit. And would they be as effective and able to do as much good if they were more considerate of people's emotions?
In the Mind and Life conferences Mattieu Ricard gives a presentation and makes a point of distinguishing two modes of compassion, affective and cognitive. To my mind this was along the lines of some of what I was trying to get at. Normally we only think of compassion as being the affective sort.
In a Buddhist sense Mattieu makes the point that the goal is to have both, like in the analogy of two wings of a bird. But of course we are all human and until we become perfectly enlightened beings we will likely have more of one than the other.
Video highlighting this point, go back a few minutes to around 1:02:00 if you want to see his whole presentation.
