The age thing redux
Jeroen
Luminous beings are we, not this crude matterNetherlands Veteran
I realised a few days ago that this year I am going to be 49… I’ve never been bothered with age very much, but somehow this time around it is different. It’s like 50 is just around the corner and that’s well into middle age, it’s an age one should be respectable.
Instead, I don’t care much about clothes, I watch science fiction, when I go anywhere it’s by bicycle or public transport, I spend time on the internet, I don’t care about money, and I still feel like someone of indeterminate youngish age. I feel like I could still go out and start a new life living somewhere in Europe doing something cool, I feel creatively energetic.
In part its because I never started a family, I think. It just never seemed like the right thing to do. Instead of settling down with a wife and kids I have wandered over the UK and the Netherlands working various creative jobs and occasionally taking sabbaticals.
It’s like I’m still 25 and the previous 25 years never happened. But somewhere I am starting to wonder whether it is entirely appropriate.
A bit of forum history for curious readers:
https://newbuddhist.com/discussion/18245/the-age-thing
Comments
We all seem to draw some comfort in graphing human behavior and predictability in accordance to how many times a human has circled the sun, but that's just us trying to carve out some imagined order from the reality of life's underlying chaos.
Relax deeply enough into an acceptance of life's chaos and each moment can be the entire definition of this life's momentary existence.
Here, what is more appropriate than just being fully present for this momentary expression of it?
I’m a year ahead of you mate (50 in December).
There are times when I love being a father (my kids spend 50% of their time with me) and my kids are a delight.
However there are other times when I wish I had the freedom your life seems to afford.
Be very careful about giving it up.....
I reckon there are pro’s and con’s, sometimes I wish for the settled life. But I think there are already plenty of humans in the world, it doesn’t need me to add more to the total. Life could easily get very empty without a partner and children, though, and so I end up dedicating myself to making the world a slightly better place in whatever small ways I can.
Freedom is fun, but it entirely depends on what you do with it. It is easy to become some kind of mobile corporate wage slave employee, I used to work for a major software company as a kind of mobile developer doing all kinds of tasks such as assessing third party software studio’s. That was interesting, you saw a lot of the world.
That’s a little ways in the past now though. In recent years I have been taking a break due to a health issue, but I’m feeling a lot better again, and maybe I will look at doing some bigger projects again soon. As the world emerges from the prolonged covid lockdown it might be a good time to stretch my legs.
Good on you @Kerome. I’m glad to hear you’re getting better.
As my old mate used to say, “the world is your lobster!”