Best Of

I can relate to that. I still think it's valuable to try to sort out the more reliable and likely from the lesser. But from a place that you never really know for sure, can always learn more, much depends on perspective and some things will likely always be out of reach.

Some people describe a spiritual journey as a process of opening yourself up to everything that made us who we are. To a consistent pilgrim on such a journey, that includes an eventual re-visiting of everything we ever tried to hold on to that wouldn't stay around, everything we ever tried to push away that wouldn't leave and everything experienced that we chose to ignore.
They are called attachments because somewhere within us, we still carry them with our true freedom being ever hobbled by their weight.

I think that meditation is that process of preparing oneself for the chance of returning to each attachment, each addition to our hobblings, but where our initiating responses to them were formally mixtures of greed, anger or delusion, they can be potentially re-met again but this time with the compassion, love and wisdom that was missing in our origin stories.
Perhaps your 30 minutes of shower time describes part of this process.