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How do you get rid of guilt?
I don't know, I always feel guilty about small things. If I think I said something slightly rude, or if I made an unnecessary comment or even forgot to say 'thank you' when someone holds the door open for me, I feel bad and can't stop thinking about it for hours. So when I actually do/say something rude/mean, I feel bad for days, and apologizing to the person doesn't make me feel much better. I'll try not to think about whatever is bothering me, but that just makes it worse.
How do you get rid of guilt? Did the buddha ever mention anything about it?
How do you get rid of guilt? Did the buddha ever mention anything about it?
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Think about your death.
What matters? Your happiness and the happiness of others. Then make no compromises. Create the momentum so that you can be unconditionally happy.
Then you can actually be of use to people.
Get your shit together. Stop thinking about yourself, which is guilt.
Start carbombing your selfcherishing. Focus completely on your path for happiness so that you can help others.
Life is short and rare. Do not waste this life.
Gratitude and contentment in all worldly things.
Discontent in your practice and study until you attain full enlightenment.
You can do it.
You may be able to get rid of accumilated guilt by forgiving yourself and acting in line with your expectations in the future - you may also be able to adjust your expectations for the future.
in my mind, guilt arises when you are in conflict with yourself - when the self does not exist, there is nothing for guilt to attach to.
Its a worthy goal... keep on it - we'll all get there in the end!
what is it concretely? is it in your body? is it a thought? where is it?
So maybe you could just accept it?
Spiny
put that voice inside your head to sleep.
It is way too hard to get to the bottom of all our fears. It is possible but takes a lot of practice.
The practical way to deal with guilt is renounciation...Renouncing the behavior that causes you guilt.
If you feel guilty about being rude to other people. Develop a method to gradually renounce that behavior. Once you realize what you doing is wrong and accepting it will put a peace in your mind. The next step is to stop it thru renounciation.
ANTIDOTE 1 - Reflect on responsibility. Often it may prove it is/was not my responsibility or fault! Blaming oneself for everything negative that happens is a form of ignorance and self-centredness. Obviously, if I am careless and intended to cause problems, then I should take my responsibility and see to it that I will not repeat this regrettable action. Instead, maybe I can do something to make up for it.
ANTIDOTE 2 - Reflect on motivation. An act done with a positive intention, especially without any self-interest is not negative, although other people may be harmed by it. The suffering experience of others is strictly spoken the result of their own actions (karma), and apparently I just happened to be part of the circumstances that could ripen their negative karma. However, we may have made some mistakes like wrong communication or insufficient attention or so. If this is the case, it should just be a reason to change our habits by improving our communication or mindfulness.
ANTIDOTE 3 - Changing or accepting. If you can change yourself or the situation, change it! If you can't change yourself or the situation for a good reason, accept it! Not acting where we can and could act can lead to frustration and guilt in the long run; just like acting where we actually cannot do anything.
ANTIDOTE 4 - Analyse the use of feeling guilty. For example: Imagine three people coming into a restaurant and ordering the same meal. One of them begins eating first, several minutes later the second begins his meal, and finally the third begins his. After the third person has eaten just a few bites, the first person clutches at his abdomen, crying out in pain; and the second begins to show signs of discomfort.
How does the third person react? Not with guilt, or self-condemnation. Instead, he naturally regrets he has eaten the same food as his two companions, but rather than dwelling on the past he moves rapidly to counter the effects of the poisonous food he has eaten. His remorse is constructive. It is based in the present; it is intelligently concerned with the future effects of his recent actions; and it leads to remedying the damage already done and to caution about repeating such an act.
ANTIDOTE 5 - Forgiving. Making mistakes is an inherent human quality: if you don't make mistakes you are definitely not a normal human being anymore. If we are unable to forgive ourselves, we will never be able to properly forgive others.
ANTIDOTE 6 - Reality check with others. If you can overcome your feelings of guilt and shame somewhat, try to discuss these matters with others and see if your reasons for feeling guilty are really valid.
ANTIDOTE 7 - Emptiness. As ultimate cure for all delusions, realising emptiness will also rid our mind of guilt. See the page on Wisdom.
guilt is self-condemnation, self-hatred.
there is no need for guilt.
it is not necessary and often very detrimental.
- I walk on someone foot,
with guilt: "I'm a piece of crap! why can't i be more mindful!!! Whats wrong with me"
without guilt: "that was a mistake, i shall try to be more mindful" (with a smile on the face)
you can use this example for any scenarios that you imagine someone can feel guilt.
just change - "I walk on someone foot" with something else.
guilt implies someone has lots of attachment with his actions, with his thoughts...
without guilt, only the situation remain. And without this negative automatic emotional reaction clouding the mind, love can shine.
be determine and try not to make the 'same mistake' again
Guilt is a crutch people use to avoid taking responsibility. On the whole, as far as these imagined minor transgressions go, they're probably mostly in your mind. Most likely no one notices, or thinks nothing of it. It's you who's being self-conscious. Think: why are you spending so much time ruminating about this? It sounds compulsive. Try actively practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness of your thoughts, and of your actions. In time both the real rudeness and the imagined rudeness and guilt obsessiveness will dissipate under the lens of mindfulness.