Meditation Class Dilemma

Seph

I have recently joined a local meditation 'group' or session(s).
It's held/taught by a E-RYT (Experienced Registered Yoga Teacher). (Yes, yes, I know. Not all meditation(s) are the same. It's just that outside of specific religious based local meditation practices, there's little else available here. And I figure practicing within some sort of group of peers with some sort of instructor is better than functioning totally on one's own. Which is what I've been doing for over the past year+ ).

Here's my issue.
I normally practice meditation in the early mornings for about 25-30 minute every sitting.
I normally use a seiza bench. (Sitting cross-legged, tailor-style, Burmese, half-lotus, full-lotus, or regular sitting on a chair, I usually and eventually slouch or my legs fall asleep or I fall asleep). None of these happen with the seiza bench. It simply works best for me.

Now, I'm not a big fan of group meditation, and I believe there's a difference between group meditation and teaching a group to meditation (on their own).

The instructor has said I can bring my seiza bench (I have a portable one) if I prefer.
This group practices sitting on chairs. Everyone within this group (it's about 14 people) are easily 50+ of age, with meditation experience ranging from having never done it before and up.

I really don't want to attract (or distract) attention from this group. (Not to mention using the seiza bench would probably not be good of some of these people's knees. I don't want my personal practice to necessarily set an example).
I'm not opposed to simply sitting in a chair, although it's not optimal for me.

What should I do?

genkaku

Get over yourself -- take the seiza bench.

Cinorjer

Take the bench. People who are making the effort to show up at a meditation class are a pretty self-selected group and the most you'll get is a question or two about what that is, and you can let them try it out.

Seph

genkaku said:

Get over yourself -- take the seiza bench.

Ouch!
Ok. Thanks!

Seph

Cinorjer said:

Take the bench. People who are making the effort to show up at a meditation class are a pretty self-selected group and the most you'll get is a question or two about what that is, and you can let them try it out.

Cool. Thanks for you time.

MaryAnne

As an over-50 gal myself, with very bad knees, I would feel a twinge of envy to see you using a "cool" seiza bench.... for about 5 seconds.
Then I wouldn't think twice about it. You do whatever makes you feel comfortable and don't worry about anyone else judging what you do. That would be their issue...

Seph

MaryAnne said:

. You do whatever makes you feel comfortable and don't worry about anyone else judging what you do. That would be their issue...

Thank you. But that's exactly the issue. I don't want it to be anybody else's issue. It's not something I need to do for this class.

MaryAnne said:

I would feel a twinge of envy to see you using a "cool" seiza bench....

I can't help but wonder if there's an unhealthy part of me that wants to be seen as 'using a cool seiza bench'. (I hope not).

MaryAnne

((((Seph))) You're 'worrying' again darlin'

Seph

MaryAnne said:

((((Seph))) You're 'worrying' again darlin'

Wow.
Even though you don't know me, you know me all too well.
That's what I do.
Worry.
Fear. It's one of the biggest battles I constantly engage in.


Thanks again.

MaryAnne

I read people.... it's what I do.

(besides, it takes one to know one; and it took me a loooong time to ease up on worrying just like you do)

Seph

MaryAnne said:

I read people.... it's what I do.

(besides, it takes one to know one; and it took me a loooong time to ease up on worrying just like you do)

Thanks again.
You rock!

riverflow

I'm a seiza-sitter myself. At the small sangha I participate in and the local monastery I often attend I'm the only one with a seiza bench (everyone else uses a zafu, some sit directly on the mat). I have to use the bench because otherwise my sciatica starts to play up.

To each their own-- do what's best for your practice. Everyone else needs to do what's best for their practice. In doing so, you and everyone else in your group can mutually support one another. Don't fret over the differences but appreciate them!

how

I sit on a small zafu in a tradition that is very particular about meditation posture.
but
while a meditation posture that minimizes physical distractions is helpful,
the real meditation is always about attending to whatever is there.

Dealing with sleepiness while meditating in a chair sometimes requires a small cushion under your ass & tailbone to tilt your pelvis forward/making sure the edge of the seat is not cutting off the circulation to the back of your legs and not leaning against the back of the chair unless you have back problems that require it. In your case (from previous posts) it might also require making sure your hands are able to rest in a way that your arms don't pull your shoulders forward.

Meditating with your group has already introduced you to the questions of meditating with self image which is very valuable lesson to delve into.

I would consider sitting in a chair (yeah I know it will be different than the bench) if I was sitting with a group of folks who's physical limitations didn't allow them to sit on the floor.

I think getting over yourself might well express itself as clearly on your choice of their chairs as your own bench.

This might be a good place to give your brain a holiday and let your meditation make the decision.

Seph

how said:

Dealing with sleepiness while meditating in a chair sometimes requires a small cushion under your ass & tailbone to tilt your pelvis forward

(That's one of the reasons why I like to seiza so much.)

how said:

In your case (from previous posts) it might also require making sure your hands are able to rest in a way that your arms don't pull your shoulders forward.

That's another good point too. I can rest my hand on my lap on the seiza bench, but I can do that too on a chair.

how said:

Meditating with your group has already introduced you to the questions of meditating with self image which is very valuable lesson to delve into.

I would consider sitting in a chair (yeah I know it will be different than the bench) if I was sitting with a group of folks who's physical limitations didn't allow them to sit on the floor.

Thanks. You're the first one to suggest this direction.

how said:

I think getting over yourself might well express itself as clearly on your choice of their chairs as your own bench.

This might be a good place to give your brain a holiday and let your meditation make the decision.

You've lost me here... ?

how

Seph said:

how said:

This might be a good place to give your brain a holiday and let your meditation make the decision.

You've lost me here... ?

Fretting, worrying and mentally masticating over a problem usually panders to the habitual conditioning that defines the self.

Using meditation to review a problem ( allowing it to just be, free of our own fiddeling self interests) often allows for selfless solutions to appear from a wider perspective.

There is the question of whether using a bench is best for you just as their might be an answer that sitting on their chairs might be better for everyone in that particular situation.

I have no opinon or insight on the answer for chairs verses your bench...

just that

the former method of dealing with the question is likely to give you the answer that is best for the self where the latter form may point out solutions that are more in keeping with the purpose of meditation.

lobster

I'm not opposed to simply sitting in a chair, although it's not optimal for me.

I have met few people in the West unable to sit in a chair for half an hour. You might I suspect find yourself more able to stay awake in a group situation . . .
'Optimal' meditation is not required for a group . . .
. . . are you so very different? (no answer required this end)

Whatever you decide. Good luck. :clap:

Seph

how said:

Seph said:

how said:

This might be a good place to give your brain a holiday and let your meditation make the decision.

You've lost me here... ?

Fretting, worrying and mentally masticating over a problem usually panders to the habitual conditioning that defines the self.

Using meditation to review a problem ( allowing it to just be, free of our own fiddeling self interests) often allows for selfless solutions to appear from a wider perspective.

There is the question of whether using a bench is best for you just as their might be an answer that sitting on their chairs might be better for everyone in that particular situation.

I have no opinon or insight on the answer for chairs verses your bench...

just that

the former method of dealing with the question is likely to give you the answer that is best for the self where the latter form may point out solutions that are more in keeping with the purpose of meditation.

Got ya.
Sounds like a good idea. I'll give it a try.
Thanks again.