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How do I just be?
novaw0lf
Veteran
How do I just be? This is something that I've been mildly criticized about on this forum for years.
“I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry-rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.” ― Jack London
It is not death that I fear, but to die before I'm dead; it's not stillness that I fear, but wasted time, life un-lived.
“I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry-rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.” ― Jack London
It is not death that I fear, but to die before I'm dead; it's not stillness that I fear, but wasted time, life un-lived.
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Or, when you chance to glance up from whatever you're doing, and you see the most spectacular sky, one you would have missed but for that chance distraction from your task - and it's so beautiful all you can do is see, without thinking anything?
Capture those instances.
That's 'being'.
Now, copy them, without the 'waking up' or 'seeing the sky'.
Simple.
The way my teacher explains it is similar to federica. When you breathe out, just before you breathe in again there is a pause. Find it, and stay in it. It allows spaciousness without thought. That doesn't mean the goal of meditation or life is to never have thoughts, that would be silly. We think. We couldn't live well if we didn't. But our thoughts are just as trainable as our muscles and we do not have to constantly be in a place where we are either reminiscing or looking too forward.
The idea that is sold to us that living is something extraordinary is quite false. Just breathing is extraordinary when you consider it. But when we are consistently told to take a vacation, buy a house, have kids, have pets, buy a new couch, buy a big new tv, do or buy whatever to make us happier, it leave us feeling constantly unhappy with *right now* and that is the only place we can be. Thus being.
I've been meditating for six months every night and bringing the teachings into my daily life to the best of my understanding and ability. I'm barely beginning. But these Buddhist 'sound bytes' are starting to make a different kind of sense to me.
It seems silly to even bother trying to apply them to one's life because the sound bytes just happen to be some of the deepest, most profound teachings that make no relative sense until many other layers of ignorance have been peeled away by practice. Otherwise the 'ego' or small self or whatever get's hold of them and does NOT know what to do with them at all but stick them on like a button advertising your religion or political party. Even worse, the ego/small self (if yours is anything like mine) has a big head and THINKS it GETS it all on it's own, and then tries to act like it gets it. And then, ends up frustrated and disillusioned at yet ANOTHER stupid bandaid being paraded around like some cosmic truth.
I remember years ago trying to get a grasp on what 'bare attention' is. WTF? The same with 'pure awareness'. "Just be aware" of the thoughts going through your head (which you canNOT stop anyway). WHAT????
What gives me tremendous faith in Buddhism is that we are to have direct experience of the fruits of the teachings for ourselves, AND a remarkably step-by-step system of guidance toward the fruitions. Meditate and grow your concentration and insight; cultivate, improve and contemplate morality in your daily life (Brahmaviharas, Seven Factors of Awakening, the Ten Paramis, etc etc).
My suspicion is the Buddhist 'sound bytes' will make perfect sense at some point down the road
BTW, I *think* I might have a sense of what 'awareness' is
Now, I could go into the meaning of the verbs 'to be', and 'to do'.
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/to_be.htm
there is an interesting section on fuzzy verb phrases with be, with alternative verbs that can be used an is particularly relevant to this site, and then there are the stative and dynamic forms that I find particularly fascinating. Then when you compare it to the verb, 'to do', which is in fact a self-description, which then becomes a puzzle, the more you think of it. Well I wouldn't want anyone to waste their life on the meaning of such stupid things so I'll just leave it there.
You seem to be yearning after something to do, but obviously you are dissatisfied with what you are doing now? Be mindful, then you will start to be. QED.
Mettha
To just be, to me, speaks of no artifice. And since my artifice manifests as any of my conditioned support for my Skandha's storyline, to just be, represents meditation.
then you give up.
then right there you're being.
a corpse
Soon enough
. . . meanwhile amongst those who can not let it 'just be'
I'll jump up and down and say, 'look at what I am'
How wonderful - living corpse.
:wave:
If wasted time/ life un-lived is another way of saying 'forever missed opportunity', then is death not a line beyond which the opportunities of this life are 'forever' (within the context of this life) ceased?
Examine your fear carefully - it is yours afterall.