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The point of coming out is self-affirmation. After years of repression, you are saying, "I'm not going to take it anymore!" Coming out is liberation for a gay person who has spent most of their life up until that point hiding and pretending to be something he or she wasn't. It is easy to sit comfortably in your alleged straightness and shake your head at those poor idiots who need to flaunt their sexuality. That is simply arrogance on your part. You don't even begin to understand the importance of coming out. Yes, in a perfect world there would be no need because people would accept other people just as they are. Would that we lived in such a world, but we don't. Discrimination is the name of the game, whether you're gay, black, Jewish, Muslim, liberal, conservative, whatever. Wherever people can find some way of feeling superior to others, they will exploit it. Coming out is a way of saying you're not going to be exploited anymore.
Palzang
thank you for posting this. very deep and insightful. you said better what i would have said if i had noticed this thread months ago
i think it is very hard for heterosexuals to understand the role that sexuality plays in every day conversations. it is literally EVERYWHERE. it may sound easy to just "not discuss it" but it's actually impossible. in most cases, to do such would result in one of two options, to either lie or to discuss it.
for example, just yesterday a woman i work with and i were discussing money issues and she says, "well, things will be better for you when you get a husband. do you have a boyfriend?" i could have just said, "no, i do not have a boyfriend." but that would allow her to believe something about me that is a lie, that i am a heterosexual. i don't mind discussing my sexuality anymore. in the past, i have found that "not discussing it" turns into lies which just simply snowball. you have no idea how many times i am put on the spot by people discussing heterosexuality. be it a co-worker asking me bluntly about my life, as the above example, or someone asking my opinion on a "hot guy". national coming out day has a slogan that is something along the lines of "silence is death", because for a lot of us, it is. it means constantly lying about something that is a huge part of who you are. it's very painful.
the situations that homosexuals are born into are still very varied. you might imagine that something like a gay pride parade seems silly and way too "in your face", but try for a second to imagine that you are gay in a small town where there is not ONE other gay person. and in fact, faggot is one of the most common obscenities and it is well known what people do to "faggots". this is the situation i was brought up into. it might sound incredibly silly, but once i got up the courage to be myself and walk into a gay bar for the first time... it was almost a holy experience. the feeling of not being alone anymore was so overwhelming i could have cried.
until this situation stops happening, we will still need gay pride events for all of those people out there who need visibility just to tell them that it's okay to be who you are.
I hear you, sister. No one should have to grow up the way most gay kids have to.
Palzang
I've never really wanted to say I'm gay because people will say I can't know for sure, and they're right. But nevertheless I'm not at all attracted to the opposite sex. I almost burst out laughing when my mum mentioned her future "daughter"-in-law. But I'm only 12 so there's so much time and I don't know how I'll turn out. I understand the point of gay pride parade and coming out now, I obviously didn't read Palzang's words properly.
And there's so much casual homophobia these days in schools it sickens me Not to say my dad's very ignorant to the matter :-/
I've never really wanted to say I'm gay because people will say I can't know for sure, and they're right.
Who cares what people say? If they say you can't know for sure if you're gay, then by the same token they can't know for sure if they're straight.
There will always be someone who won't agree with you, no matter what your orientation is. You don't necessarily need to label yourself one way or the other. I've always felt that there was more to attraction than just gender, race, age, etc. I love people for who they are inside, regardless of what society thinks. Ultimately only you know what makes you happy!
And there's so much casual homophobia these days in schools it sickens me
I can't stand when people disparage the LGBT community; it's not right. There's homophobia everywhere, but it's especially bad in schools. Kids can be especially cruel to those considered "different" or marginalized. Just remember that homophobia is a product of ignorance, and only by using compassionate wisdom can we begin to dismantle the false notions these delusions create.
Who cares what people say? If they say you can't know for sure if you're gay, then by the same token they can't know for sure if they're straight.
There will always be someone who won't agree with you, no matter what your orientation is. You don't necessarily need to label yourself one way or the other. I've always felt that there was more to attraction than just gender, race, age, etc. I love people for who they are inside, regardless of what society thinks. Ultimately only you know what makes you happy!
Bu
Who knows? No need to fret about it. You'll be a great jellybean no matter what
I can't stand when people disparage the LGBT community; it's not right. There's homophobia everywhere, but it's especially bad in schools. Kids can be especially cruel to those considered "different" or marginalized. Just remember that homophobia is a product of ignorance, and only by using compassionate wisdom can we begin to dismantle the false notions these delusions create.
Very apt. The Spanish rebels thought Soviet socialists fight fascism, and they did too. Who doesn't fight fascism? Fascism is, by definition, against everyone and everything else.
I've never really wanted to say I'm gay because people will say I can't know for sure, and they're right. But nevertheless I'm not at all attracted to the opposite sex. I almost burst out laughing when my mum mentioned her future "daughter"-in-law. But I'm only 12 so there's so much time and I don't know how I'll turn out. I understand the point of gay pride parade and coming out now, I obviously didn't read Palzang's words properly.
And there's so much casual homophobia these days in schools it sickens me Not to say my dad's very ignorant to the matter :-/
Jellybean
Wait till puberty properly kicks in my friend, Most kids used to find girls Icky at your age even i did
Joe, I understand where you're coming from. I knew I was gay (or at least different) from as far back as I can remember. I had crushes on boys before I knew what crushes were or what they implied. I don't know how it'll all turn out for you, maybe it is just a passing phase, maybe not. Whatever, the only thing I would recommend is never be afraid of who you are and never let the world decide how you live. That was the big mistake I made, and I've regretted it all my life. You don't have to do that. Like Mugzy said, you'll always be a great jellybean no matter what happens.
I've never really wanted to say I'm gay because people will say I can't know for sure, and they're right. But nevertheless I'm not at all attracted to the opposite sex. I almost burst out laughing when my mum mentioned her future "daughter"-in-law. But I'm only 12 so there's so much time and I don't know how I'll turn out. I understand the point of gay pride parade and coming out now, I obviously didn't read Palzang's words properly.
And there's so much casual homophobia these days in schools it sickens me Not to say my dad's very ignorant to the matter :-/
Jellybean
well, the real question is not whether or not you are attracted to the opposite sex... it's whether or not you are attracted to the same sex. and you are still only 12, it is hard to say. but i definitely wouldn't worry about it. for a long time i didn't want to label myself because i thought that it might keep me from experiencing something. but after a while, i realized that i just really do not have any feelings toward men. for me, this was the eventual decision but it may be different for you. no need to label yourself now.
but if you do believe that you are gay, there is no need to tell others until you are completely ready. sure, 12 is a little young, but i've definitely heard younger. i figured it out at 14, myself.
i know what you mean about homophobia. it is truly quite sad. i used to think that being gay was a curse, but i have since become not just content, but happy that i am how i am. knowing how i suffered in school, i sometimes shudder to think that had i not been gay, i could have been just like the other kids... causing torment to someone for something so stupid. once i realized this, i became thankful that i am gay. so much of the homophobia is caused by christianity and you cannot blame them for simply believing what they are told. there is no real scientific proof and it becomes a debate based upon a book that too many view as indisputable. i consider myself lucky to have the opportunity to know better. this way i have the knowledge and drive to help others instead of causing more suffering.
Wait till puberty properly kicks in my friend, Most kids used to find girls Icky at your age even i did
It's not like that, one of my best friends is a girl and the other's a boy, but I'm not attracted to either or think either are Icky, they're just friends
Joe, I understand where you're coming from. I knew I was gay (or at least different) from as far back as I can remember. I had crushes on boys before I knew what crushes were or what they implied. I don't know how it'll all turn out for you, maybe it is just a passing phase, maybe not. Whatever, the only thing I would recommend is never be afraid of who you are and never let the world decide how you live. That was the big mistake I made, and I've regretted it all my life. You don't have to do that. Like Mugzy said, you'll always be a great jellybean no matter what happens.
Palzang
Thanks Palzang I've only "fancied" girls but I don't remember really "loving" them and I'm not at all comfortable with physical contact. I quite possibly mistook one feeling for another. It's only know I've started thinking about the...em..."mechanics"...of an... "adult situation"...I'm not physically attracted to girls. But they say when you're between 12 and 15 you become more aware, and since I've been 12 I've been wondering. I broke up with my last girlfriend because I felt like I was suppressing...me Oh well, I'll stay happy and see what happens
well, the real question is not whether or not you are attracted to the opposite sex... it's whether or not you are attracted to the same sex. and you are still only 12, it is hard to say. but i definitely wouldn't worry about it. for a long time i didn't want to label myself because i thought that it might keep me from experiencing something. but after a while, i realized that i just really do not have any feelings toward men. for me, this was the eventual decision but it may be different for you. no need to label yourself now.
but if you do believe that you are gay, there is no need to tell others until you are completely ready. sure, 12 is a little young, but i've definitely heard younger. i figured it out at 14, myself.
i know what you mean about homophobia. it is truly quite sad. i used to think that being gay was a curse, but i have since become not just content, but happy that i am how i am. knowing how i suffered in school, i sometimes shudder to think that had i not been gay, i could have been just like the other kids... causing torment to someone for something so stupid. once i realized this, i became thankful that i am gay. so much of the homophobia is caused by christianity and you cannot blame them for simply believing what they are told. there is no real scientific proof and it becomes a debate based upon a book that too many view as indisputable. i consider myself lucky to have the opportunity to know better. this way i have the knowledge and drive to help others instead of causing more suffering.
I've came across many open minded Christians, Islamic countries seem to be the worse, anyway, enough finger-pointing
Am I attracted to the same sex? Good question and I knew it was coming. Physically? Yes. Emotionally? No idea. But I'll find out sooner or later.
Thanks for the help everyone,
Jellybean
0
zombiegirlbeating the drum of the lifelessin a dry wastelandVeteran
I've came across many open minded Christians, Islamic countries seem to be the worse, anyway, enough finger-pointing
i don't know much about islamic countries. i was speaking based upon my experiences growing up...and there weren't many minorities where i grew up. mostly everyone was white and christian. but that's not to say that i haven't met open minded christians, i went to a very open minded church for several years... but... those people definitely didn't live in the town i grew up in, haha.
but people can change, you know? a good friend of mine who once told me all gay people should be shot in the face with a shot-gun is now very accepting of me and couldn't care less. i guess this stuff tends to happen when you grow up and find things out for yourself.
It's not like that, one of my best friends is a girl and the other's a boy, but I'm not attracted to either or think either are Icky, they're just friends
i don't know much about islamic countries. i was speaking based upon my experiences growing up...and there weren't many minorities where i grew up. mostly everyone was white and christian. but that's not to say that i haven't met open minded christians, i went to a very open minded church for several years... but... those people definitely didn't live in the town i grew up in, haha.
but people can change, you know? a good friend of mine who once told me all gay people should be shot in the face with a shot-gun is now very accepting of me and couldn't care less. i guess this stuff tends to happen when you grow up and find things out for yourself.
Until they become Icky, stop being my friends or I start being attracted to one of them Brittany isn't very attractive and Xander's too immature anyway
Until they become Icky, stop being my friends or I start being attracted to one of them Brittany isn't very attractive and Xander's too immature anyway
Sounds like you need to develop some equnimity young man
A blow to my ego but quite right, thanks Discussion over
Self-Delusion causes extreme suffering, Look how many people cling at these illusions, Sexuality especially...I am Gay, Straight, Bi....Stop. Equnimity we need it for our own and others welfare without a balanced mind that views everyone with a warm heart, Deluded views arise, and when they arise suffering is not far behind.
America seems to be declining at the moment and I frankly don't see things returning to what they were during the boom years any time soon. People have gotten used to a high quality of life and now that's changed for quite a few people and, I suspect, will change for more in the years to come. So there's anger and there's confusion, as well as deep distrust of the system (government, corporations and elites). I expect to see many interesting organizations and ideas come into existence as people try to defend themselves against the difficulties.
"Tea Party" I am sceptical about- it seems like they're driven by the older generations' nonstalgy about the past. Their assumption seems to be that if the government gives people economic freedom by cutting taxes and removing regulations, things will magically fix themselves. However, America's standard of living depends too much on factors outside of America (natural resources and manufacturing) and I doubt that the solution can be purely internal.
Perhaps it is possible to admit that Globalization is not in the interest of Americans and block it, but there are two problems with that. First, that would require strong Government involvement. Second, it would take many years to build a system independend on the outside world and its resources-- and patience isn't one of our virtues...
America seems to be declining at the moment and I frankly don't see things returning to what they were during the boom years any time soon. People have gotten used to a high quality of life and now that's changed for quite a few people and, I suspect, will change for more in the years to come. So there's anger and there's confusion, as well as deep distrust of the system (government, corporations and elites). I expect to see many interesting organizations and ideas come into existence as people try to defend themselves against the difficulties.
"Tea Party" I am sceptical about- it seems like they're driven by the older generations' nonstalgy about the past. Their assumption seems to be that if the government gives people economic freedom by cutting taxes and removing regulations, things will magically fix themselves. However, America's standard of living depends too much on factors outside of America (natural resources and manufacturing) and I doubt that the solution can be purely internal.
Perhaps it is possible to admit that Globalization is not in the interest of Americans and block it, but there are two problems with that. First, that would require strong Government involvement. Second, it would take many years to build a system independend on the outside world and its resources-- and patience isn't one of our virtues...
i have been thinking a lot about this as well. i'm not a poli-sci major or anything, so i'm not really well enough versed to comment on it though (but i will anyways, ha ha ha...).
all i know is that i see this everywhere... so many people i know go to college, get degrees in subjects that don't equate to a job... and then work a minimum wage job, struggling with student loans. i'm so confused at how people can waste their money this way. my only thoughts are that somehow, our generation was raised to believe that everyone MUST go to college. this is such a strong force that people don't even take it seriously anymore. debt has become so natural for us. i am so confused when i hear my friends talk about buying beer on their credit card. SERIOUSLY? how could you think that is an appropriate or good idea?
i've also heard this argument of economic freedom=people putting money back into the economy. a friend of mine is a very strict fiscal republican and this was always his stance. tax cuts so that business owners can offer more jobs, put more into the company, etc. the only problem is that we keep finding these CEOs are actually just embezzling, and it's made me seriously doubt this strategy. and it's not just in the higher ups either, this mentality is all over the lower classes as well (although, maybe it always was?). far too many people get paid under the table and lie just to receive aide.
my second job is as a massage therapist and for the most part, it's very cash in hand and i am simply required to file as an independent contractor. the more i claim, the more the government takes. normally, a job takes these taxes out of every pay check so it doesn't seem as bad, but when you have to pay it all at once, it kinda sucks. so many people have told me to just not claim it at all and i'm sort of bothered by it. if i did that, it would make me no better than the CEOs lying about their profits for a tax break. i guess the only difference is that i work extremely hard at two jobs just to scrape by... and these people have private jets. haha. oh well. c'est la vie, no?
I don't know... I was attracted to girls when I was 7-8 year old. This might not be true for everyone...at 12 you do know who you are attracted to... emotionally - no. but physically yes is the sign enough -- you might want to wait before you break the news -- such new, sadly, are not accepted calmly by others.
I don't know... I was attracted to girls when I was 7-8 year old. This might not be true for everyone...at 12 you do know who you are attracted to... emotionally - no. but physically yes is the sign enough -- you might want to wait before you break the news -- such new, sadly, are not accepted calmly by others.
BTW I hate racists.
I always wondered what your view on GLBT was...
I heard you start becoming aware of your sexuality when you become between 12 and 15.
And if I did know I don't think I'd be breaking the news any time soon.
I hate racists too. I actually love lots of different cultures like Native Americans and I like lots of accents like German, Nederlands, Swedish, lots... I love Italian food too and in my experiance Canadians are really nice What would we do without other races?
I always wondered what your view on GLBT was...
I heard you start becoming aware of your sexuality when you become between 12 and 15.
And if I did know I don't think I'd be breaking the news any time soon.
I hate racists too. I actually love lots of different cultures like Native Americans and I like lots of accents like German, Nederlands, Swedish, lots... I love Italian food too and in my experiance Canadians are really nice What would we do without other races?
Hateing people is bad. Just leads to more suffering. Do we fight hatred with more hate...No this is not the way Buddha instructed.
it is very very sad to see that racism is strong in some parts of the world.
The attack against Indian Kids in Australia is very unfortunate. I don't see why we don't see other people as "people" why bring cast and race in between.
if you want to differentiate people - differentiate murders, rapist, psychopaths from normal people.
I always wondered what your view on GLBT was...
I heard you start becoming aware of your sexuality when you become between 12 and 15.
And if I did know I don't think I'd be breaking the news any time soon.
I hate racists too. I actually love lots of different cultures like Native Americans and I like lots of accents like German, Nederlands, Swedish, lots... I love Italian food too and in my experiance Canadians are really nice What would we do without other races?
I have no problem with GLBT... if people like that, who am I to say it is wrong. Who am I to decide what is wrong or right? It's their life, they have the right to live it the way they like.
I became aware of my sexuality when I was 11-12 year old, when I was in 7th grade. that's when I started noticing girls.
and Yeah. don't break the news until you get a job and become financially independent.
it is very very sad to see that racism is strong in some parts of the world.
The attack against Indian Kids in Australia is very unfortunate. I don't see why we don't see other people as "people" why bring cast and race in between.
if you want to differentiate people - differentiate murders, rapist, psychopaths from normal people.
People beat up other people to take attention away from their own insecurities and feelings of worthlessness. It's a coward's way out. And why would you want to differentiate murderers, rapists, etc? They're just sentient beings exactly like you are who are trying to be happy, though obviously with no clue how to do that (and who does?). And are you aware that the teachings state that we've all done far worse than what they have done at some point? We've lived countless times, and we've managed to do every vile thing imaginable (and also every good thing imaginable) during that endless time. Differentiating yourself from any sentient being is not the path taught by Lord Buddha.
I have no problem with GLBT... if people like that, who am I to say it is wrong. Who am I to decide what is wrong or right? It's their life, they have the right to live it the way they like.
I became aware of my sexuality when I was 11-12 year old, when I was in 7th grade. that's when I started noticing girls.
and Yeah. don't break the news until you get a job and become financially independent.
That's my plan, just in case
I went on holiday to the lake district and in a little village there was LOTS of people from different cultures and it was really cool I find Africans quite attractive; my dad's worse nightmare :rolleyes:
People beat up other people to take attention away from their own insecurities and feelings of worthlessness. It's a coward's way out. And why would you want to differentiate murderers, rapists, etc? They're just sentient beings exactly like you are who are trying to be happy, though obviously with no clue how to do that (and who does?). And are you aware that the teachings state that we've all done far worse than what they have done at some point? We've lived countless times, and we've managed to do every vile thing imaginable (and also every good thing imaginable) during that endless time. Differentiating yourself from any sentient being is not the path taught by Lord Buddha.
That's my plan, just in case
I went on holiday to the lake district and in a little village there was LOTS of people from different cultures and it was really cool I find Africans quite attractive; my dad's worse nightmare :rolleyes:
The answer is to develop pure view in which you view all sentient beings without differentiation. Of course, that is not an easy thing to do, but it what we all strive for.
why would you have any problem... it's your decision and your choice. your parents would/might have a problem.... but it really depends on how open minded they are.
The answer is to develop pure view in which you view all sentient beings without differentiation. Of course, that is not an easy thing to do, but it what we all strive for.
Palzang
that is very hard to do... I cannot feel compassionate towards murders/psychopaths who kill innocent people and kids.
And why would you want to differentiate murderers, rapists, etc? They're just sentient beings exactly like you are who are trying to be happy, though obviously with no clue how to do that (and who does?).
Palzang
well I don't murder innocent people to be happy - that is the difference between me and them.
if you don't have any clue to feel happy - killing is not the solution.
I can't even begin to imagine how people would feel peace and happiness by killing innocent kids.
It's hard, but possible, meditate on it Davey Most people who kill are obviously mentally unstable...
Well my dad wouldn't have a problem with me moving out because I don't live with with him and my mum sighs at the slightest thing anyway.
the thing is buddy, I don't want to feel compassionate towards them, I want to hate them for what they did and are still doing. The world would be a much better place without such filthy creatures.
But if you're filled with hatred, what makes you better than them? If a dog bites you and you continue to abuse the dog, the dog is MORE likely to bite you again. People can change, and they can't change unless they are shown compassion.
But I know where you're coming from.
If you nurture hate for them.
You both lose.
Comments
thank you for posting this.
i think it is very hard for heterosexuals to understand the role that sexuality plays in every day conversations. it is literally EVERYWHERE. it may sound easy to just "not discuss it" but it's actually impossible. in most cases, to do such would result in one of two options, to either lie or to discuss it.
for example, just yesterday a woman i work with and i were discussing money issues and she says, "well, things will be better for you when you get a husband. do you have a boyfriend?" i could have just said, "no, i do not have a boyfriend." but that would allow her to believe something about me that is a lie, that i am a heterosexual. i don't mind discussing my sexuality anymore. in the past, i have found that "not discussing it" turns into lies which just simply snowball. you have no idea how many times i am put on the spot by people discussing heterosexuality. be it a co-worker asking me bluntly about my life, as the above example, or someone asking my opinion on a "hot guy". national coming out day has a slogan that is something along the lines of "silence is death", because for a lot of us, it is. it means constantly lying about something that is a huge part of who you are. it's very painful.
the situations that homosexuals are born into are still very varied. you might imagine that something like a gay pride parade seems silly and way too "in your face", but try for a second to imagine that you are gay in a small town where there is not ONE other gay person. and in fact, faggot is one of the most common obscenities and it is well known what people do to "faggots". this is the situation i was brought up into. it might sound incredibly silly, but once i got up the courage to be myself and walk into a gay bar for the first time... it was almost a holy experience. the feeling of not being alone anymore was so overwhelming i could have cried.
until this situation stops happening, we will still need gay pride events for all of those people out there who need visibility just to tell them that it's okay to be who you are.
Palzang
I've never really wanted to say I'm gay because people will say I can't know for sure, and they're right. But nevertheless I'm not at all attracted to the opposite sex. I almost burst out laughing when my mum mentioned her future "daughter"-in-law. But I'm only 12 so there's so much time and I don't know how I'll turn out. I understand the point of gay pride parade and coming out now, I obviously didn't read Palzang's words properly.
And there's so much casual homophobia these days in schools it sickens me
Jellybean
Who cares what people say? If they say you can't know for sure if you're gay, then by the same token they can't know for sure if they're straight.
There will always be someone who won't agree with you, no matter what your orientation is. You don't necessarily need to label yourself one way or the other. I've always felt that there was more to attraction than just gender, race, age, etc. I love people for who they are inside, regardless of what society thinks. Ultimately only you know what makes you happy!
Who knows? No need to fret about it. You'll be a great jellybean no matter what
I can't stand when people disparage the LGBT community; it's not right. There's homophobia everywhere, but it's especially bad in schools. Kids can be especially cruel to those considered "different" or marginalized. Just remember that homophobia is a product of ignorance, and only by using compassionate wisdom can we begin to dismantle the false notions these delusions create.
Thanks, you're right and you've been a great help
Very glad I could help! It brings me great joy :thumbsup:
What is im not following the conversation ?
Wait till puberty properly kicks in my friend, Most kids used to find girls Icky at your age even i did
Joe, I understand where you're coming from. I knew I was gay (or at least different) from as far back as I can remember. I had crushes on boys before I knew what crushes were or what they implied. I don't know how it'll all turn out for you, maybe it is just a passing phase, maybe not. Whatever, the only thing I would recommend is never be afraid of who you are and never let the world decide how you live. That was the big mistake I made, and I've regretted it all my life. You don't have to do that. Like Mugzy said, you'll always be a great jellybean no matter what happens.
Palzang
This is the best advice!
:bigclap:
well, the real question is not whether or not you are attracted to the opposite sex... it's whether or not you are attracted to the same sex. and you are still only 12, it is hard to say. but i definitely wouldn't worry about it. for a long time i didn't want to label myself because i thought that it might keep me from experiencing something. but after a while, i realized that i just really do not have any feelings toward men. for me, this was the eventual decision but it may be different for you. no need to label yourself now.
but if you do believe that you are gay, there is no need to tell others until you are completely ready. sure, 12 is a little young, but i've definitely heard younger. i figured it out at 14, myself.
i know what you mean about homophobia. it is truly quite sad. i used to think that being gay was a curse, but i have since become not just content, but happy that i am how i am. knowing how i suffered in school, i sometimes shudder to think that had i not been gay, i could have been just like the other kids... causing torment to someone for something so stupid. once i realized this, i became thankful that i am gay. so much of the homophobia is caused by christianity and you cannot blame them for simply believing what they are told. there is no real scientific proof and it becomes a debate based upon a book that too many view as indisputable. i consider myself lucky to have the opportunity to know better. this way i have the knowledge and drive to help others instead of causing more suffering.
Sorry, I don't know what I was talking about
It's not like that, one of my best friends is a girl and the other's a boy, but I'm not attracted to either or think either are Icky, they're just friends
Thanks Palzang
I've came across many open minded Christians, Islamic countries seem to be the worse, anyway, enough finger-pointing
Am I attracted to the same sex? Good question and I knew it was coming. Physically? Yes. Emotionally? No idea. But I'll find out sooner or later.
Thanks for the help everyone,
Jellybean
i don't know much about islamic countries. i was speaking based upon my experiences growing up...and there weren't many minorities where i grew up. mostly everyone was white and christian. but that's not to say that i haven't met open minded christians, i went to a very open minded church for several years... but... those people definitely didn't live in the town i grew up in, haha.
but people can change, you know? a good friend of mine who once told me all gay people should be shot in the face with a shot-gun is now very accepting of me and couldn't care less. i guess this stuff tends to happen when you grow up and find things out for yourself.
Early days
Until they become Icky, stop being my friends or I start being attracted to one of them
Sounds like you need to develop some equnimity young man
Stop dwelling on such thoughts of what you maybe...This Self-grasping mind causes pain and confusion
Self-Delusion causes extreme suffering, Look how many people cling at these illusions, Sexuality especially...I am Gay, Straight, Bi....Stop. Equnimity we need it for our own and others welfare without a balanced mind that views everyone with a warm heart, Deluded views arise, and when they arise suffering is not far behind.
"Tea Party" I am sceptical about- it seems like they're driven by the older generations' nonstalgy about the past. Their assumption seems to be that if the government gives people economic freedom by cutting taxes and removing regulations, things will magically fix themselves. However, America's standard of living depends too much on factors outside of America (natural resources and manufacturing) and I doubt that the solution can be purely internal.
Perhaps it is possible to admit that Globalization is not in the interest of Americans and block it, but there are two problems with that. First, that would require strong Government involvement. Second, it would take many years to build a system independend on the outside world and its resources-- and patience isn't one of our virtues...
how lucky for you then
i have been thinking a lot about this as well. i'm not a poli-sci major or anything, so i'm not really well enough versed to comment on it though (but i will anyways, ha ha ha...).
all i know is that i see this everywhere... so many people i know go to college, get degrees in subjects that don't equate to a job... and then work a minimum wage job, struggling with student loans. i'm so confused at how people can waste their money this way. my only thoughts are that somehow, our generation was raised to believe that everyone MUST go to college. this is such a strong force that people don't even take it seriously anymore. debt has become so natural for us. i am so confused when i hear my friends talk about buying beer on their credit card. SERIOUSLY? how could you think that is an appropriate or good idea?
i've also heard this argument of economic freedom=people putting money back into the economy. a friend of mine is a very strict fiscal republican and this was always his stance. tax cuts so that business owners can offer more jobs, put more into the company, etc. the only problem is that we keep finding these CEOs are actually just embezzling, and it's made me seriously doubt this strategy. and it's not just in the higher ups either, this mentality is all over the lower classes as well (although, maybe it always was?). far too many people get paid under the table and lie just to receive aide.
my second job is as a massage therapist and for the most part, it's very cash in hand and i am simply required to file as an independent contractor. the more i claim, the more the government takes. normally, a job takes these taxes out of every pay check so it doesn't seem as bad, but when you have to pay it all at once, it kinda sucks. so many people have told me to just not claim it at all and i'm sort of bothered by it. if i did that, it would make me no better than the CEOs lying about their profits for a tax break. i guess the only difference is that i work extremely hard at two jobs just to scrape by... and these people have private jets. haha. oh well. c'est la vie, no?
BTW I hate racists.
I always wondered what your view on GLBT was...
I heard you start becoming aware of your sexuality when you become between 12 and 15.
And if I did know I don't think I'd be breaking the news any time soon.
I hate racists too. I actually love lots of different cultures like Native Americans and I like lots of accents like German, Nederlands, Swedish, lots... I love Italian food too and in my experiance Canadians are really nice
Hateing people is bad. Just leads to more suffering. Do we fight hatred with more hate...No this is not the way Buddha instructed.
The attack against Indian Kids in Australia is very unfortunate. I don't see why we don't see other people as "people" why bring cast and race in between.
if you want to differentiate people - differentiate murders, rapist, psychopaths from normal people.
I have no problem with GLBT... if people like that, who am I to say it is wrong. Who am I to decide what is wrong or right? It's their life, they have the right to live it the way they like.
I became aware of my sexuality when I was 11-12 year old, when I was in 7th grade. that's when I started noticing girls.
and Yeah. don't break the news until you get a job and become financially independent.
People beat up other people to take attention away from their own insecurities and feelings of worthlessness. It's a coward's way out. And why would you want to differentiate murderers, rapists, etc? They're just sentient beings exactly like you are who are trying to be happy, though obviously with no clue how to do that (and who does?). And are you aware that the teachings state that we've all done far worse than what they have done at some point? We've lived countless times, and we've managed to do every vile thing imaginable (and also every good thing imaginable) during that endless time. Differentiating yourself from any sentient being is not the path taught by Lord Buddha.
Palzang
That's my plan, just in case
I went on holiday to the lake district and in a little village there was LOTS of people from different cultures and it was really cool
Palzang
so what would you suggest?
LOL. poor guy
Me or my dad?
The answer is to develop pure view in which you view all sentient beings without differentiation. Of course, that is not an easy thing to do, but it what we all strive for.
Palzang
that is very hard to do... I cannot feel compassionate towards murders/psychopaths who kill innocent people and kids.
well I don't murder innocent people to be happy - that is the difference between me and them.
if you don't have any clue to feel happy - killing is not the solution.
I can't even begin to imagine how people would feel peace and happiness by killing innocent kids.
Well my dad wouldn't have a problem with me moving out because I don't live with with him and my mum sighs at the slightest thing anyway.
the thing is buddy, I don't want to feel compassionate towards them, I want to hate them for what they did and are still doing. The world would be a much better place without such filthy creatures.
But I know where you're coming from.
If you nurture hate for them.
You both lose.
Jellybean