Best Of
Re: What books are you reading?
@person said:
That second post is pretty intriguing. I can very much understand not wanting to go into details and don't think you should.I wonder how connected the two are, looking for acceptance and your father's story. What I'm hearing is largely a lack of internal confidence. Have you looked into the work on self compassion? A lot of it is how to be kind and accepting to oneself even if you don't feel like you're the greatest. It helps learn how to treat yourself as a friend rather than turning the critic on yourself.
I'm always looking for acceptance, the book about my father's story is just something I learned recently about (I already knew about another book written about him). Without going into actual details, if you can believe it, my wife's father is also someone infamous with several books written about him and we had no idea when we've met, so we could say that winning the lottery is less likely than the two of us ending up together in such a small country. But to answer your question naturally, growing up with an absent or abusive father would shape anyone's inner critic and it certainly gives one something to work with in case they wish to silence it and find peace. I think of the inner child sometime, I read books that emphasize how important it is to be kind and accepting to oneself, but it's one thing to acknowledge that and another to feel it, especially when you spiral and feeling hurt blinds you. I am still searching for various ways to just let go of the emotional need of always saying what I want to and be valued for what I say, I'm sure in time I'll get there, but it doesn't hurt if I find some real eye-opener to read. 
RobinH
Re: What books are you reading?
I’ve had similar reactions to the way some Buddhist texts talk about Hell, especially when the language is very absolute or very dramatic. What’s helped me over the years is shifting the frame from “places we go after death” to “realms we move through moment by moment.”
In the older Buddhist cosmology, the hell realms aren’t just locations — they’re descriptions of what the mind feels like when it’s overwhelmed by certain patterns. Anyone who has been caught in rage, shame, or self‑loathing already knows what a hell realm feels like. It’s not somewhere you go, it’s a state you enter, often many times a day, depending on where the mind lands.
From that perspective, the warnings in texts like The Way of the Bodhisattva stop sounding like threats and start sounding like psychological descriptions. “Falling into Hell” becomes “falling into a mental state where suffering becomes intense and self‑reinforcing.” And “walking the Dharma path” becomes “learning how to recognize those states early, soften them, and step out of them before they harden.”
For me, that makes the whole thing much more workable. Instead of imagining some cosmic judge sending people to eternal torment, I can look at my own experience: how anger creates a world where everything feels hostile, how fear creates a world where everything feels dangerous, how craving creates a world where nothing is ever enough. These are realms too — and they shift as quickly as attention shifts.
So when I read strict passages now, I take them as reminders of how dramatically the mind can change the world we seem to inhabit. Not as predictions about the afterlife, but as descriptions of the landscapes we walk through every day.
Re: The AI tsunami
Yes, I heard about Hugging Face, and that they were basically bought out by NVidia to dissuade them from a lawsuit against the makers of the AI agents involved, which would have forced a legal opinion on whether companies creating AI agents are liable for the harm these agents might do.
Jeroen
Re: Compassion in a dark world
“A single candle cannot remove all the darkness in the world,” he said, “but it can still brighten the room around it.”
...And shed light so other might see
Shoshin1
Re: Manifesting: real or hokum?
Manifest, I think, is used as bringing forth or onto perceived reality that which is already within. To reach beyond the veil, beneath the the pool of darkness to bring forth or to "MANIFEST" the true self - the selfless self, the self which is not the self and the not self which is the self as one in the same.
In the Western culture in particular, we are brought up aware that we are separate, unique, apart. Yes, we have family, community bindings, but still unique.
We are each unique, true. But we are also we are interconnected, we are a part of this world, this universe and is within each and all of us. We have separate, individual conciseness, yet we share consciousness.
This manifesting is not through the conscious mind as we know or perceive it, but through the emergence of the Greater Mind, so to speak. Call it what you will.
It is what we may call the bringing forth, the Emergence (Manifestation) of the Buddha state, the awakening, the "Emerging from the fog into the bright sunlight."
That is, naturally, merely my way of putting it, incomplete as it is, but, here we are.
Peace to all
Lionduck
Re: Compassion in a dark world
The realm or worlds are separated for purpose of description.
They are not, in reality separate domains.
They are conditions within which one passes often from moment to moment.
All are within each all the others.
One in the Deva Realm has not divested of the other realms, but the dominant realm remains the Deva Realm.
One who is currently within the Animal Realm may pass, in an instant, into the Human Realm or even the Deva Realm while still within the Animal Realm.
An example drawn from a movie quote (I do not remember the movie title):
While in prison, place considered to the physical manifestation of either the Hell Realm or the Animal Realm, the main character states, "...I have never been freer than I am now.", showing himself to be in the Human or even the Deva Realm while within what can be considered a Hell Realm.
Again, Whether described as The Ten Worlds or as The Six Realms, these worlds or realms are not separate worlds or realms, but life conditions, possessed by each and all of us. And, each world or realm is contains within it all the other life conditions (worlds or realms) which may/will arise depending upon internal and external circumstances.
Peace to all
Lionduck
Compassion in a dark world
HOW CAN I BE HAPPY WHEN THERE IS SO MUCH WRONG IN THE WORLD?
A wonderful answer by a Buddhist monk:
A man once asked an old Buddhist monk:
“How can I allow myself to feel peace or happiness when the world is full of suffering, injustice, pain, and chaos?”
The monk looked at him quietly and asked:
“If your house was dark, would you refuse to light a candle simply because the whole world is not yet bright?”
The man fell silent.
“The suffering of the world is real,” the monk continued. “But if you destroy your own peace completely, you may lose the clarity and strength needed to help anyone.”
“But isn’t being happy selfish when others are suffering?” the man asked.
The monk smiled gently.
“Caring about suffering does not require you to suffer every moment. Compassion needs a steady heart. When you are consumed by despair, it becomes harder to respond with wisdom.”
Then the monk pointed toward a nearby pond.
“When the water is disturbed, it cannot reflect clearly. But when it becomes still, everything becomes easier to see.”
He looked back at the man.
“The same can happen with the mind. A restless mind may react with fear, anger, or hopelessness. A calmer mind has more space for wisdom, compassion, and meaningful action.”
The man lowered his head.
“But the world still feels so heavy.”
“Yes,” the monk replied. “And that is why your peace matters.”
“Do not try to carry the suffering of the entire world in one heart.
Be kind where you are.
Help where you can.
Speak gently.
Protect what you can.
Reduce suffering in whatever small ways are within your reach.”
“A single candle cannot remove all the darkness in the world,” he said, “but it can still brighten the room around it.”
In Buddhism, happiness is not about ignoring suffering or pretending that everything is fine. It is about developing enough inner stability to remain compassionate without being completely consumed by the pain you witness.
You are allowed to feel joy while caring about the world. You are allowed to rest while others are struggling. And you can protect your peace not to escape responsibility, but to have the strength to meet suffering with greater wisdom and compassion.
The monk smiled one final time:
“Do not extinguish your own light because the world is dark.
Keep it burning.
Then use that light to make the small part of the world around you a little brighter.”
Jeffrey
Re: On Christa Pike
@Jeroen said:
I read up on the Wikipedia page, I didn’t know the case. First of all, I think it is somewhat absurd to now keep her in intensive care on a ventilator machine, while first they try to take her life by lethal injection.
I'm sure her doctors feel the same way. Especially knowing that another attempt to execute her is a very real possibility once her health is restored. Her entire life was tragic and although I wish for the family of her victim to find peace too, I wish more people would want to prevent such through humane ways as opposed to just take revenge with extreme cruelty.
RobinH
Re: On Christa Pike
I'm by no means an expert, but I think acceptance of what is would be the choice I would try to take. My heart aches for what's happened, and I am firmly anti capital punishment. I have been all my life since I could understand what it is.
I'm actually quite concerned for the victim's parents as they have made some disturbing (to me) comments on Christa and her current suffering.
Re: Just for fun: the random, useless announcements thread!
I’ve started participating with a TV programme called ‘Nederland in Beweging’, it’s a short 15 minute daily show on Dutch television in which you do exercises in front of your tv, following along with the presenters. It’s a full-body set of exercises, intended to focus on condition and flexibility and coordination.
It starts with a warming up, continues with sections ‘good for your heart’, ‘good for your legs’ and ‘good for your torso’, and then a cooling down. It isn't really a replacement for cardio training or strength training, but as a short programme for the whole body it is very good.
It is very accessible, I do it together with my mother, who is 77 and suffers from deafness and poor balance, so she does a lot of the exercises only halfway. It is aimed more at my age, which is 54, where people are still flexible and capable but might have a few beginning problems.
Jeroen