Best Of

There is a more interesting game afoot.
It's call life or existence.
That should be your playground.
It is a game too but the stakes are much higher.

Satta sutta- A Being

"Just as when boys or girls are playing with little sand castles:[4] as long as they are not free from passion, desire, love, thirst, fever, & craving for those little sand castles, that's how long they have fun with those sand castles, enjoy them, treasure them, feel possessive of them. But when they become free from passion, desire, love, thirst, fever, & craving for those little sand castles, then they smash them, scatter them, demolish them with their hands or feet and make them unfit for play.

"In the same way, Radha, you too should smash, scatter, & demolish form, and make it unfit for play. Practice for the ending of craving for form.

"You should smash, scatter, & demolish feeling, and make it unfit for play. Practice for the ending of craving for feeling.

"You should smash, scatter, & demolish perception, and make it unfit for play. Practice for the ending of craving for perception.

"You should smash, scatter, & demolish fabrications, and make them unfit for play. Practice for the ending of craving for fabrications.

"You should smash, scatter, & demolish consciousness and make it unfit for play. Practice for the ending of craving for consciousness — for the ending of craving, Radha, is Unbinding."

@Jeroen said:
Today I came across this, which struck me as relevant…

To transcend, not to win – to transcend. This word is very beautiful. What does it mean, to ”transcend”?

It is just as if a small child is playing with his toys. You tell him to put them away and he becomes angry. Even when he goes to sleep he goes with his toys, and the mother has to remove them when he has fallen asleep. In the morning the first thing that he demands to know is where his toys are and who has taken them away. Even in the dream he dreams about the toys. Then suddenly one day he forgets about the toys. For a few days they remain in the corner of his room, and then they are removed or thrown away; never again does he ask for them. What has happened?

He has transcended, he has become mature. It is not a fight and a victory; it is not that he was fighting against the desire to have toys. No, suddenly one day he sees this is childish and he is no more a child; suddenly one day he realizes that toys are toys, they are not real life and he is ready for the real life. His back is turned towards the toys. Never again in dreams will they come; never again will he think about them. And if he sees some other child playing with toys, he will laugh; he will laugh knowingly... a knowing laugh, a wise laugh. He will say, ”He’s a child, still childish, playing with toys.” He has transcended.

Transcendence is a very spontaneous phenomenon. It is not to be cultivated. You simply become more mature. You simply see the whole absurdity of a certain thing... and you transcend.

Osho, Tantra: The Supreme Understanding

Its a criticism I'm familiar with, I've heard it plenty, "its childish, grow up", etc. It does bring up some of the teenage emotions of being teased or demeaned for my nerdy interests. But by and large I'm over it, I like playing games with people. I think I do it in a more mature way now, than when I was younger. Like engaging with character driven play in RPGs, or using games as a way to socialize and bond with others.

...Children possess a pure innocence that most adults have long lost. They embrace their curiosity, ask questions, and entertain novel ideas with humility and wonder. As adults, we tend to refrain from asking questions, fearing it may expose our ignorance or vulnerability.

To truly appreciate the beauty and enchantment of everyday life, we need to adopt a childlike perspective characterized by wonder and inquisitiveness.

The journey of adulthood is often laden with responsibilities, stress, and challenges, making us yearn for the carefree days of our childhood. We find solace in reminiscing about those days when life was simpler and less complicated...

https://medium.com/a-taste-for-life/innocence-unleashed-why-adults-yearn-for-childlike-joy-11973562ba2b#:~:text=Reconnecting with this childlike perspective,childlike playfulness can be liberating.

Is it pure and perfect? No. Does it have to be in order to have positive value? I don't think so. Do I feel happier after a session, as opposed to after a session of video gaming? Yes. On the whole is it a positive aspect of my life? Yes. Would other people answer these questions the same? Unlikely. Does that make it bad or good? Is insulin good or bad for people to take.

Agree on games aren't reality, they are simplistic models. The real world is much more complex with real stakes. At the same time meditation isn't the real world yet it helps train and prepare our mind to engage with the real world in healthier ways. The majority of games do offer a mode of training that conditions our minds to act in antisocial ways. I don't think that function is inherent to games though, I think it has more to do the design and individual player engagement with them. Games can be used to develop positive qualities too, at least in my experience.

One can play board games with the intent to dominate and humiliate the other players or they can be played as a modality (there's a better word I can't think of) to connect and bond, to laugh and smile with friends, family or complete strangers.

I've played games of D&D where the purpose is to min/max rules and character strategies to kill anything that moves and get loot. And I've played D&D games where the purpose is to explore character and story, to make jokes and explore the spontaneity of improv. Most of the time being some mix along that spectrum.

I know people who have bookshelves full of board games and host weekly game nights for friends. To say that what they're doing is negative and they'd be better off hosting spiritual book club nights or something along those lines doesn't feel like wholesome advice.

@Jeroen said:

@person said:
I'll own up to it, its an attachment of mine. Its good to be reminded of the fact that it does add to delusion. Reflecting, I think I've made the decision (at least for the time being) that trying to live in the world and externally letting go of my attachments leads to me living a miserable life.

This is the passage in particular that has stayed with me @person. Games are something that lends colour and excitement to life in a safe way. If I were to try and find the attributes I mentioned in the above post in the real world, I’d have to become some kind of world traveller to very adventurous places.

Where I am now is coping with a certain ambiguity. On the one hand I’m glad to have had those gaming experiences, and on the other hand I realise that they are spiritually not helpful, that they do add to the delusion.

I recall a long series of dreams I had during my period of Buddhist studies in which I was back in games development and playing games. They were kind of joyful dreams, but also dreams which presented questions, about programming, generalship, combat, computers, machines even. They began when I had been meditating for a while, and these were part of what convinced me that my period in games development had influenced me on a spiritual level.

I think it had to do with my passion, I was pretty total for quite a while in both work and play, to the exclusion of things like starting a family, which I certainly had the financial room to do.

What I mean by that is there is a sort of inner peace and happiness that comes from spiritual work. I've experienced that at times when I've been able to retreat from the world and focus inwardly. Living in the world requires efforts and activities that stir things up and a level of taking in the neurosis of the rest of the world. What that means for me is I go out into the world, take on negativity, come home and doing the spiritual work means confronting, processing and settling all that stuff. Only to go right out back into it, so all of the difficulty with little of the inner reward.

What a regulated and healthier intake of some worldly pleasures gives me is some kind of worldly happiness in my life. A big part of me would like to live that sort of blissed out meditative life, but for various reasons I'm resistant to taking that plunge. I've spent many years of my life on the edge of that leap, but have now decided that I'm probably not going to take it, so I'm attempting live a life of balance between spiritual and worldly.

I'm venting some of my pain and frustration right now, because like I said a part of me would like to let it all go. But my experience so far has been that the inner happiness and peace rewards of a spiritual life aren't really on the table while living in the world, so I'm stuck with worldly pleasures that aren't so toxic and hopefully have some positive benefit too.