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Funny Stuff

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Comments

  • KundoShoshinColinA
  • This is some cross country skiers going up my street. We had a snow storm last night and everything has been closed: schools, my girlfriends work, and my tutoring at the library all closed.

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    edited January 2019

    @Jeffrey , did you mean to post that in 'Funny Stuff'... or was it meant for 'general banter'...?

  • @federica I meant Funny Stuff because I find it funny that day after snowstorm people are skiing up the road

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    @Jeffrey said:
    @federica I meant Funny Stuff because I find it funny that day after snowstorm people are skiing up the road

    To us in the UK, that would bring the whole country to a halt. 1" of snow is critical. 3" would be life-threatening. 6"...? "The End is Nigh!!"

    Kundo
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    Buddhist Economics...?

    JeroenFosdickadamcrossley
  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran
  • personperson Don't believe everything you think The liminal space Veteran

    Shoshin
  • FosdickFosdick in its eye are mirrored far off mountains Alaska, USA Veteran

    Jeffrey
  • Meditative concentration or just old age?

    KundoJeroenShoshin
  • JeroenJeroen Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter Netherlands Veteran

    I’d guess old age... my stepfather is nearly at this stage, he often forgets things.

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    Meditative Old Age.... ;)

  • ShoshinShoshin No one in particular Nowhere Special Veteran

    JeffreypersonKundo
  • ShoshinShoshin No one in particular Nowhere Special Veteran

    JeffreyJeroenfederica
  • personperson Don't believe everything you think The liminal space Veteran

  • personperson Don't believe everything you think The liminal space Veteran

    “More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.”

    ― Woody Allen

    federica
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    ....."Sir"....? With boobs....? That cat needs to be struck off!

  • federicaShoshinKundo
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    VastmindKundo
  • ShoshinKundoadamcrossley
  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran

    Once there was a monk who was an expert on the Diamond Sutra, and as books were very valuable in his day, he carried the only copy in his part of the world on his back. He was widely sought after for his readings and insight into the Diamond Sutra, and very successful at propounding its profundities to not only monks and masters but to the lay people as well.

    Thus the people of that region came to know of the Diamond Sutra, and as the monk was traveling on a mountain road, he came upon an old woman selling tea and cakes. The hungry monk would have loved to refresh himself, but alas, he had no money. He told the old woman, "I have upon my back a treasure beyond knowing -- the Diamond Sutra. If you will give me some tea and cakes, I will tell you of this great treasure of knowledge."

    The old woman knew something of the Diamond Sutra herself, and proposed her own bargain. She said, "Oh learned monk, if you will answer a simple question, I will give you tea and cakes." To this the monk readily agreed. The woman then said, "When you eat these cakes, are you eating with the mind of the past, the mind of the present or the mind of the future?"

    No answer occurred to the monk, so he took the pack from his back and got out the text of the Diamond Sutra, hoping he could find the answer. As he studied and pondered, the day grew late and the old woman packed up her things to go home for the day.

    "You are a foolish monk indeed," said the old woman as she left the hungry monk in his quandary. "You eat the tea and cakes with your mouth."

    federicaVastmind
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    Brings to mind that debate between the Tibetan Lama and the Zen Monk...

    "Doesn't he know what an orange is?"

  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran

    For those unfamiliar the true illustrative story @federica mentions ...
    http://newbuddhist.com/discussion/13919/zen-master-vs-tibetan-lama

  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran

    Something for the Shakespearian and Beatles fans. Richard III meets Dr Strangelove

    Jeroen
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    Classic.

  • personperson Don't believe everything you think The liminal space Veteran

    Just a few things to remember as you head out the door.

    JeffreyShoshin
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    My husband was running an errand for me last night:

    "salad, fries, milk. salad, fries, milk. salad, fries, milk. salad, fries, milk. salad, fries, milk. salad, fries, milk."

    Do you want me to write it down?

    No, it's only fries, milk..... and what else....?

    His mind went blank.

    ~ slaphead ~

    personVastmind
  • Throwback to the scary Easter Bunny!



  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran

    Pro tip saying for when you are trading insults with someone:

    I’m manufactured from Hevea brasiliensis you’re manufactured from Cyanoacralate and your admonition elastically rebounds off of me and adheres to you!

    person
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    Oh yea, rolls off the tongue real easy...

    I like -

    "You are a self-made (wo)man who worships her/his creator...."

  • personperson Don't believe everything you think The liminal space Veteran

    Materially substantial elongated cylinders and small fragments of igneous or sedimentary formations may fracture my skeletal system, but pejorative personal identifiers will never injure me.

    JeffreyShoshinVastmindfederica
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    Oh fuck off.

    :lol:

    personVastmindBunks
  • techietechie India Veteran

    @federica said:
    Oh fuck off.

    :lol:

    I think waste material has hit the air propeller. :p

    federica
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    edited May 2019

    My H always says "The bovine scatology has been in collision with the variable-speed 3-blade rotating ventilator"... To which I replied, "Oscillation optional...?"

    "Oh, mandatory" he would retort, with a wise professor-look on his face...

    Much the same thing...

    JeffreyVastmind
  • ShoshinShoshin No one in particular Nowhere Special Veteran

    federicalobsterpersonBunks
  • BunksBunks Australia Veteran

    Haha, I like that @Shoshin - it's like when you don't want someone to sit beside you on the train you look people in the eye as they get and pat the seat....

    Shoshin
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    @Bunks said:
    Haha, I like that @Shoshin - it's like when you don't want someone to sit beside you on the train you look people in the eye as they get and pat the seat....

    .... with that Jack Nicholson eyes-half-closed grin...

    Shoshin
  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran

    from As Good As It Gets

    <3

    Jeroen
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran

    Lee82Shoshinperson
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    We had that notice up in the Italian Deli I used to run... The amount of parents who were willing to call our bluff was staggering...

  • KundoKundo Sydney, Australia Veteran
    edited June 2019
    • deleted as I can't upload the pic :angry:
    lobster
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    @Kundo said:

    • deleted as I can't upload the pic :angry:

    Patience dear heart, patience....

    Bunks
  • lobsterlobster Crusty Veteran

    @Kundo said:

    • deleted as I can't upload the pic :angry:

    On occasion emptiness is form and the joke is missing.
    Here is a consolation pic, just to rub in the emptiness ... Oh I iz wikid ... o:)

  • KundoKundo Sydney, Australia Veteran

    @lobster said:

    On occasion emptiness is form and the joke is missing.
    Here is a consolation pic, just to rub in the emptiness ... Oh I iz wikid ... o:)

    👊👊👊😋😋😋

    lobster
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